# Say Something Ketchuppy! Fun for creative minds **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 5, 2002, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161 "2002-09-05T17:42:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/1 "2002-09-05T17:42:59Z")
Recently I was amused to discover that, on the bottle of Heinz ketchup, they’ve begun printing quirky little labels. The two I bought proclaim “Your Fish Stick Improvement System” and “Taller Than Mayonaisse.” hee hee. Cute, Heinz. Then last night I’m eating my tater tots and reading the ketchup bottle and discover the company is having a contest. Think of something fun and witty for us to print on our ketchup labels! > [@](#): > > Say Something Ketchuppy! > Sometimes our label gets tired of saying “Tomato Ketchup” all the time. So it will make a joke about french fries or have some fun at the expense of mustard. Now it wants your ideas. Just come up with something funny to say on a Heinz Tomato Ketchup squeeze bottle. The eight best entries will go on our prestigious front label, and 100 Second Prize winners will get t-shirts personalized with their own phrase on the Heinz Tomato Ketchup front label. Right up my alley! I love writing headlines, making up program titles and generally producing pithy witticisms. (Not that I’m always good at it! I just enjoy it!) So confronted with the contest last night, I come up with a couple right away, the best of which is **It’s Going to the Dogs.** Well, I bet the Teeming Millions could think of a few cute phrases. Maybe we’ll submit them, maybe we won’t. What’s your suggestion? ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/2 "2002-09-05T17:58:57Z")
Not as snooty as tartar sauce. It pours really slow, which is good, because… um… wait, don’t tell me, I know this one… Instant fake blood! Scare your friends! Put this on your buns! ---
**Author:** ![Fibonacci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Fibonacci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibonacci)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/3 "2002-09-05T18:08:33Z")
“Our condiments to the chef!” “Put it on your dog! Don’t be a yellow belly!” ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/4 "2002-09-05T18:33:24Z")
Ketchup - contains 10% Catsup. ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/5 "2002-09-05T18:34:08Z")
Squeeze me…you know you wanna. ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/6 "2002-09-05T18:36:24Z")
Easier to pronounce than Worchestershire Sauce. ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/7 "2002-09-05T19:21:12Z")
It’s what the Mama tomato said when her baby fell behind! ---
**Author:** ![Lisa\_Ann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bc79bd/32.png) [@Lisa\_Ann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lisa_Ann)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/8 "2002-09-05T19:32:55Z")
For use in case of emergency - when you can’t cut the mustard. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/9 "2002-09-05T19:47:25Z")
According to the Government, it’s a vegetable! ---
**Author:** ![Zappo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b3f665/32.png) [@Zappo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zappo)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/10 "2002-09-05T20:00:44Z")
My personal favorite is on the bottle in my fridge at home: “Plays Nice With French Fries.” As for others, well. . . \*Making Scrambled Eggs Better Since 1860 \*Not For Use As A Beverage. \*Made From Happy Tomatoes \*Who Cares About The Other 56 Varieties? ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/11 "2002-09-05T20:11:42Z")
The official contest rules say no more than eight words, so anybody wanting to run the straight and narrow might want to keep it to that. [Contest](http://www.heinz.com:80/jsp/promotion.jsp) I love yours, photopat! Scrambled eggs, Zap?! ::shudder:: 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/12 "2002-09-05T20:19:04Z")
Mine doesn’t sound exciting enough. How about changing it to: Ketchup- now with 10% _more_ catsup! ---
**Author:** ![h.sapiens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e0b2c6/32.png) [@h.sapiens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/h.sapiens)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/13 "2002-09-05T20:40:02Z")
King of the Condiments The reddest thing you’ll ever eat ---
**Author:** ![Fibonacci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Fibonacci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibonacci)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/14 "2002-09-05T21:01:39Z")
“Do it doggie style!” “Apply to weiner. Insert in bun.” “Catsup is for weinies.” “Ketchup Uber Alles.” On the plastic bottles: “Rudest noise wins.” ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/15 "2002-09-05T21:16:24Z")
Thanks Ellen, although I have to say I like “Ketchup Uber Alles” too. By the way, what’s it like being a Tom Robbins character? ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/16 "2002-09-05T21:24:03Z")
Thanks Ellen, although I have to say I like “Ketchup Uber Alles” too. By the way, what’s it like being a Tom Robbins character? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/17 "2002-09-05T21:53:33Z")
Spank our bottom! ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/18 "2002-09-05T22:40:25Z")
Sauce-age for your sausage! If you look up “It” in the dictionary, this bottle is pictured by “ketchup.” Better than throw-up! Wuvs you. Flavor by the squirt. Making things tastier, one food group at a time. As American as apple pie, only red. Buy it locally, use it vocally. Eat me! ---
**Author:** ![h.sapiens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e0b2c6/32.png) [@h.sapiens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/h.sapiens)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2002, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/19 "2002-09-05T23:13:50Z")
Just add hot water: instant tomato soup! ---
**Author:** ![Fibonacci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Fibonacci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibonacci)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2002, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161/20 "2002-09-06T00:38:16Z")
“Lather. Rinse. Repeat.” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/say-something-ketchuppy-fun-for-creative-minds/127161.md?page=2)