# Saying Hot Chick = Being A Misogynist Asshole **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 7, 2018, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925 "2018-09-07T04:12:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/121 "2018-09-07T15:37:18Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > {…} I also get some inappropriate comments about my daughters {…} “Inappropriate comments”? Umm, which side of this do you want to be on again? CMC fnord! ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/122 "2018-09-07T15:38:59Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > Do I really need to explain why it might bother women more than men to be on the receiving end of an unsolicited opinion about the looks of another woman? :smack: > [@Slash1972](#): > > I don’t need you to, no. I’m interested in how you would explain it though, so yeah, give it a try. > [@RTFirefly](#): > > The women here on the Dope, just like women _everyfuckingwhere_, routinely get bombarded in inappropriate situations with unsolicited opinions about their bodies, their looks, their hotness or notness. We guys don’t get that bombardment. > [@RTFirefly](#): > > Opinions by male Dopers about the hotness of women in threads on completely unrelated topics just adds to that bombardment. For us guys, such comments aren’t piling on top of a pre-existing bombardment. So that shit bothers us a good deal less. Any questions? :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/123 "2018-09-07T15:39:53Z")
> [@Stanislaus](#): > > No, those are pretty standard definitions of sexual harassment. I don’t think “Someone making threats to harm you” is covered under the traditional definitions of sexual harassment. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/124 "2018-09-07T15:40:07Z")
> [@Crafter\_Man](#): > > I’ve seen quite a few women I consider to be “hot chicks.” Actress Jenny Agutter, for example. And one of the executive assistants at my workplace. Should I be sent to a reeducation camp now? No, unless for some reason you feel the need to say something out loud about their appearance. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/125 "2018-09-07T15:40:46Z")
**Kimstu** : I agree with those who say you are doing a great job here. I don’t have anything to add to what you’ve already said. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/126 "2018-09-07T15:41:23Z")
> [@Crafter\_Man](#): > > I’ve seen quite a few women I consider to be “hot chicks.” Actress Jenny Agutter, for example. And one of the executive assistants at my workplace. Should I be sent to a reeducation camp now? Let’s try this again: > [@RTFirefly](#): > > _Having_ such an opinion doesn’t make you misogynistic. > > _Sharing_ that opinion with people - especially women - who’d rather not have your opinions about such things inflicted on them: _that’s_ misogynistic. > > Does that help? ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/127 "2018-09-07T15:42:00Z")
> [@crowmanyclouds](#): > > “Inappropriate comments”? Umm, which side of this do you want to be on again? > > CMC fnord! There is a time an place for most things. Many women spend countless time and money to make themselves look “hot”. It is fine to compliment a grown woman in that way but it is not OK for a grown man to say something like that to a 16 year old. I will often tell them they look pretty because they do but context is everything. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/128 "2018-09-07T15:43:36Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > We guys don’t get that bombardment.For us guys, such comments aren’t piling on top of a pre-existing bombardment. So that shit bothers us a good deal less. > > Any questions? :rolleyes: No, no questions. Thanks for letting me know how bothered I am about that shit though. I appreciate it 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/129 "2018-09-07T15:44:53Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > There is a time an place for most things. {…} Really? Could you explain that to the, at this point mostly, guys that ain’t gettin’ it? CMC fnord! ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/130 "2018-09-07T15:46:17Z")
> [@Crafter\_Man](#): > > I’ve seen quite a few women I consider to be “hot chicks.” There’s nothing in the least wrong with that. But contrary to what you may believe, you are not required to be constantly telling people about your opinions of random chicks’ hotness in any and all circumstances in order to prove your manhood. (And thanks for the kind words, various fellow posters: it is very nice of you.) ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/131 "2018-09-07T15:51:09Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > There’s nothing in the least wrong with that. But contrary to what you may believe, you are not required to be constantly telling people about your opinions of random chicks’ hotness in any and all circumstances in order to prove your manhood. > > (And thanks for the kind words, various fellow posters: it is very nice of you.) But we can continue to tell people our opinions of other aspects of a woman in any and all circumstances though, right? As long as we don’t mention hotness? ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/132 "2018-09-07T15:56:46Z")
> [@HeweyLogan](#): > > This is no way a thread on moderator actions/beliefs board related to a question in ABTMB. > > It is, but it isn’t. > > To women, what part of ‘Hot Chick’ is offensive, the hot part or chick? I’m not authorized to speak on behalf of women, but I think you’re missing the point. Let’s use an analogy. Suppose you expressed an interesting thought, and people responded to it _not_ in a way that acknowledged any part of what you had said, but which instead focused on who they thought _you_ were, and that they made lewd or even semi-complimentary (for that matter) comments about _you_ but ignored the content of what you said. Suppose they did that a whole lot. Suppose they did that not only to you but to everyone who shared a categorical characteristic with you. Like let’s say you had little horns, a shock of vertically-oriented hair, and a bulbous nose, and that on that basis of that appearance you were classified along with other folks of similar appearance and given a descriptive term. Something somewhat akin to “Hot Chick” although not quite that. It wouldn’t take long before you resented it, right? ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/133 "2018-09-07T15:58:50Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > But we can continue to tell people our opinions of other aspects of a woman in any and all circumstances though, right? As long as we don’t mention hotness? 😕 Why would you think that? Do you honestly believe that no kinds of comments about another person except sexualizing comments can ever be inappropriate? In this thread we’ve been focusing specifically on inappropriate comments about appearance and hotness, because that’s the particular form of inappropriate behavior that some posters seem to be having trouble understanding. But if we have to go all the way back to kindergarten level of explaining that there are **many different** types of comments about another person that can be inappropriate, depending on the situation… then Lordy, we’re going to be here quite a while. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/134 "2018-09-07T16:04:42Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > 😕 Why would you think that? Do you honestly believe that no kinds of comments about another person except sexualizing comments can ever be inappropriate? > > In this thread we’ve been focusing specifically on inappropriate comments about appearance and hotness, because that’s the particular form of inappropriate behavior that some posters seem to be having trouble understanding. > > But if we have to go all the way back to kindergarten level of explaining that there are **many different** types of comments about another person that can be inappropriate, depending on the situation… then Lordy, we’re going to be here quite a while. :rolleyes: Surely you’re not suggesting a level of decorum that calls back to days gone past? Surely you’re not suggesting a level of decorum that one might expect when talking about one’s own daughters or sisters? CMC fnord! ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/135 "2018-09-07T16:04:46Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > Thanks for letting me know how bothered I am about that shit though. I appreciate it 🙂 Ain’t enough rolleyes. ---
**Author:** ![Stanislaus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stanislaus/32/3391_2.png) [@Stanislaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stanislaus)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/136 "2018-09-07T16:04:57Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > I don’t think “Someone making threats to harm you” is covered under the traditional definitions of sexual harassment. The CDC includes threats of harm via rape or spreading sexual rumours [here](https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/sv_surveillance_definitionsl-2009-a.pdf). I agree that as quoted in the report that item doesn’t explicitly mention a sexual element. However, given that the survey was prefaced by a lengthy statement of the subject matter, and that the rest of the items were explicit about the sexual element, I doubt the respondents failed to put it in context. Even if they did and we felt compelled to strike it out of the data, it would have a negligible effect on the findings. At worst, the 81% lifetime experience of harassment assault would become 77%. So… I guess there’s no problem? ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/137 "2018-09-07T16:06:24Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > 😕 Why would you think that? Do you honestly believe that no kinds of comments about another person except sexualizing comments can ever be inappropriate? > > In this thread we’ve been focusing specifically on inappropriate comments about appearance and hotness, because that’s the particular form of inappropriate behavior that some posters seem to be having trouble understanding. > > But if we have to go all the way back to kindergarten level of explaining that there are **many different** types of comments about another person that can be inappropriate, depending on the situation… then Lordy, we’re going to be here quite a while. :rolleyes: Sure, but only the “hotness” seems to be described as misogynistic. What about comments about intelligence? Would that be misogynistic as well, or just jerkish? ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/138 "2018-09-07T16:11:32Z")
> [@Stanislaus](#): > > The CDC includes threats of harm via rape or spreading sexual rumours [here](https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/sv_surveillance_definitionsl-2009-a.pdf). I agree that as quoted in the report that item doesn’t explicitly mention a sexual element. However, given that the survey was prefaced by a lengthy statement of the subject matter, and that the rest of the items were explicit about the sexual element, I doubt the respondents failed to put it in context. > > Even if they did and we felt compelled to strike it out of the data, it would have a negligible effect on the findings. At worst, the 81% lifetime experience of harassment assault would become 77%. So… I guess there’s no problem? Please don’t assume conclusions that I have in no way advocated. Some of those things I’ve never seen defined as “sexual harassment”. That was one of them. Calling someone a “fag” or “dyke” is another thing I’ve never seen described as sexual harassment. Nor “misgendering” a person, or texting someone in “a harassing way” In any event, I appreciate the link, and this isn’t the thread to discuss the study. But thanks for linking it. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/139 "2018-09-07T16:17:26Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > Sure, but only the “hotness” seems to be described as misogynistic. What about comments about intelligence? Would that be misogynistic as well, or just jerkish? Context. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2018, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925/140 "2018-09-07T16:17:30Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > There is a time an place for most things. Many women spend countless time and money to make themselves look “hot”. It is fine to compliment a grown woman in that way but it is not OK for a grown man to say something like that to a 16 year old. I will often tell them they look pretty because they do but context is everything. Context IS everything, but the point is that even with grown women, if you don’t know them, or know them only as colleagues at work, or just acquaintances, very few contexts allow for even polite compliments on their looks. Obviously if you’re involved with someone or have a sufficiently comfortable friendship for such things, there are a lot more contexts were compliments on their looks are acceptable or even desirable. But we’re talking about a pretty limited number of people here. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saying-hot-chick-being-a-misogynist-asshole/820925.md?page=8)