# SC woman charged with stabbing husband with ceramic squirrel **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 28, 2013, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369 "2013-12-28T20:23:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2013, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/1 "2013-12-28T20:23:08Z")
[Link](http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/12/27/22075945-sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-a-ceramic-squirrel?lite) > [@](#): > > A South Carolina woman was held on a domestic abuse charge for allegedly stabbing her common-law husband with a decorative ceramic squirrel when he came home late on Christmas Eve without any beer. Sounds like a rocky relationship. Still, she could have stabbed him in the nuts. Let’s see… [ul][li]Southern state? Check.[/li][li]Common-law marriage? Check.[/li][li]Beer issue? Check.[/li][li]Tacky decoration? Check.[/ul][/li] Way to perpetuate the stereotype, woman! (I wonder if they live in a trailer?) ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2013, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/2 "2013-12-28T20:24:22Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > [Link](http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/12/27/22075945-sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-a-ceramic-squirrel?lite) > **Sounds like a rocky relationship.** Still, she could have stabbed him in the nuts. > > Let’s see… > [ul][li]Southern state? Check.[/li][li]Common-law marriage? Check.[/li][li]Beer issue? Check.[/li][li]Tacky decoration? Check.[/ul][/li] > Way to perpetuate the stereotype, woman! (I wonder if they live in a trailer?) Only if she threw the squirrel. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2013, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/3 "2013-12-28T20:29:29Z")
I love the last line in the story: > [@](#): > > _The condition of the squirrel wasn’t reported._ ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2013, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/4 "2013-12-28T20:36:08Z")
I guess now TSA will start confiscating ceramic knick knacks before you board an airplane. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2013, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/5 "2013-12-28T21:18:39Z")
Thanks, Obama! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2013, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/6 "2013-12-28T21:22:59Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > I guess now TSA will start confiscating ceramic knick knacks before you board an airplane. :rolleyes: “Start?” ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e4f/32.png) [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_is_the_new_Analog)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/7 "2013-12-29T00:12:17Z")
I’d like to apologize, on behalf of Florida, for not doing this first. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/8 "2013-12-29T00:20:14Z")
I would not approach within a mile of that woman without bringing alcohol. ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/9 "2013-12-29T01:12:40Z")
Why is a ceramic squirrel _sharp_? And, you know, where? An ear? Those tree-rats don’t even have pointy tails. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/10 "2013-12-29T01:16:49Z")
You know who _else_ is associated with [dangerous squirrels](http://s1.b3ta.com/host/creative/82418/1287423452/HitlerSquirrel.jpg)? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/11 "2013-12-29T01:18:55Z")
[QUOTE=NBC News] The man fled to a neighbor’s home to call 911, and when officers arrived shortly after midnight — on Christmas Day by now — they found him covered in blood with cuts on his shoulder and face, according to the report. When he took off his shirt, they found a big gash in his chest, **it said.** [/QUOTE] It said? IT SAID?! Did they interview the squirrel? Really, he’s a victim too here. Just for existing, really. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/12 "2013-12-29T01:21:47Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > You know who _else_ is associated with [dangerous squirrels](http://s1.b3ta.com/host/creative/82418/1287423452/HitlerSquirrel.jpg)? :dubious: [And…](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_xqU8aCV8ADc/TSl44YI-EqI/AAAAAAAAAs8/yp0xmlgBF20/s1600/cve.jpg) Though he’s drinking from a moose (Moose & Squirrel!), there was that scene where the squirrel invades their home. ---
**Author:** ![MikeG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikeg/32/4329_2.png) [@MikeG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeG)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/13 "2013-12-29T01:34:19Z")
Wait, a man made himself a sandwich? I dunno about that. ---
**Author:** ![Iggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iggy/32/3364_2.png) [@Iggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iggy)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/14 "2013-12-29T01:35:36Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > … > Way to perpetuate the stereotype, woman! (I wonder if they live in a trailer?) Checking out Google Street view, most of the homes appear to be stick built but there are a couple of trailers! ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/15 "2013-12-29T01:55:12Z")
Oh, just great. Now this will bring all the ceramic-squirrel-grabbers out of the woodwork. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/16 "2013-12-29T01:59:34Z")
Which part of the squirrel was used to do the stabbing? I’m guessing the tail, but when kitsch is used as impaling weapons, you never can be certain. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/17 "2013-12-29T02:03:04Z")
> [@Tamerlane](#): > > Why is a ceramic squirrel _sharp_? And, you know, where? An ear? Those tree-rats don’t even have pointy tails. Considering the extent of the injuries, I’m wondering if the weapon was, in reality, a ceramic jackalope. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/18 "2013-12-29T02:29:27Z")
From the linked NBC News report: > [@](#): > > When he took off his shirt, they [i.e. police] found a big gash in his chest… Well, at least the squirrel didn’t go for his nuts. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/19 "2013-12-29T02:52:20Z")
> [@Tamerlane](#): > > Why is a ceramic squirrel _sharp_? And, you know, where? An ear? Those tree-rats don’t even have pointy tails. You have obviously never been to South Carolina. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/20 "2013-12-29T04:32:14Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > I guess now TSA will start confiscating ceramic knick knacks before you board an airplane. :rolleyes: “Watch me pull a ceramic squirrel out of a hat…!” “…Again…?” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369.md?page=2)