# SC woman charged with stabbing husband with ceramic squirrel **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 28, 2013, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369 "2013-12-28T20:23:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/21 "2013-12-29T04:49:31Z")
Just like a South Carolinan to bring a ceramic squirrel to a knife fight… ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/22 "2013-12-29T05:03:41Z")
> [@Tamerlane](#): > > Why is a ceramic squirrel _sharp_? And, you know, where? An ear? Those tree-rats don’t even have pointy tails. My guess is it broke on the conking. ---
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 12:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/23 "2013-12-29T12:13:57Z")
You can have my ceramic squirrel when you pry it from my cold dead hands. ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/24 "2013-12-29T12:30:40Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > Sounds like a rocky relationship. Still, she could have stabbed him in the nuts. Well done. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/25 "2013-12-29T16:19:35Z")
> [@Tamerlane](#): > > Why is a ceramic squirrel _sharp_? And, you know, where? An ear? Those tree-rats don’t even have pointy tails. The details were a little fuzzy. ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/26 "2013-12-29T16:56:29Z")
> [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](#): > > I’d like to apologize, on behalf of Florida, for not doing this first. Seriously. I thought Florida was at the forefront of ceramic animal attacks. Oh wait, that was lawn flamingo attacks. Mea culpa. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/27 "2013-12-29T19:42:12Z")
I like that they specified that it was \*decorative \*ceramic squirrel. Not a functional ceramic squirrel. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/28 "2013-12-29T20:08:30Z")
> [@Hypno-Toad](#): > > I like that they specified that it was \*decorative \*ceramic squirrel. Not a functional ceramic squirrel. Yeah, that’s what we need, a bunch of golem squirrels running around. ---
**Author:** ![randompattern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7993a0/32.png) [@randompattern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/randompattern)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/29 "2013-12-29T20:15:19Z")
> [@Count\_Blucher](#): > > “Watch me pull a ceramic squirrel out of a hat…!” > > “…Again…?” Hat? no…Chest ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/30 "2013-12-29T20:30:37Z")
> [@Hypno-Toad](#): > > I like that they specified that it was \*decorative \*ceramic squirrel. Not a functional ceramic squirrel. I guess if you really squint you could see a ceramic squirrel being used as a water fountain or something as a functional ceramic squirrel. I mean, _really_ squint. ---
**Author:** ![Nancarrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c37758/32.png) [@Nancarrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nancarrow)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/31 "2013-12-29T22:23:47Z")
That seems like an awfully specific charge. Just how many laws does South Carolina have? ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/32 "2013-12-30T00:38:07Z")
It’s a slippery slope if you ask me. When decorative ceramic squirrels are outlawed, only outlaws will have decorative ceramic squirrels, right? ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/33 "2013-12-30T01:32:08Z")
And then there’s this, also from South Cackalackey: [Oh, no, you di-int!](http://www.wistv.com/story/24306912/woman-stabs-man-during-domestic-dispute-christmas-day) ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/34 "2013-12-30T02:58:06Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > I would not approach within a mile of that woman without bringing alcohol. that’s a given but I assume most men would CONSUME the alcohol first. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/35 "2013-12-30T03:21:58Z")
_sigh_ That’s about 10 miles from here. Go, South Carolina. Though, I’ll say…on the subject of trailers… There’s a godawful lot of them - some fairly nice - down here. The local weather conditions don’t call for really heavy structures. And I certainly have brokerage clients with significant assets who live in such. It’s weird. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/36 "2013-12-30T03:34:46Z")
> [@Magiver](#): > > that’s a given but I assume most men would CONSUME the alcohol first. Only as an anesthetic while you are stabbed/bludgeoned to death with a ceramic arboreal rodent. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/37 "2013-12-30T13:45:51Z")
I would like to take this opportunity to thank South Carolina for taking the crown of “Craziest Carolina.” We in North Carolina were getting tired of having it hanging around, gathering dust. (The crown, that is.) ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/38 "2013-12-30T13:55:58Z")
> [@Nancarrow](#): > > That seems like an awfully specific charge. Just how many laws does South Carolina have? I am getting very fond of the “criminal domestic violence of a high and aggravated nature” charge myself. As opposed to the low and un-aggravating domestic violence. Although, generally speaking, all violence kinda aggravates me. Huh. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/39 "2013-12-30T17:35:57Z")
> [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](#): > > I’d like to apologize, on behalf of Florida, for not doing this first. Personally, I’m stunned that this didn’t take place in my home state of Wisconsin. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369/40 "2013-12-30T17:41:29Z")
This whole thing sounds like a white trash version of Clue. “It was Amber Tabledance, in the trailer, with the Ceramic Squirrel.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sc-woman-charged-with-stabbing-husband-with-ceramic-squirrel/677369.md?page=3)