Scam (Internet and Otherwise) Omnibus Thread

One of my Japanese friends is chatting online with a scammer.

A couple of days ago, the scammer sent this text:

That’s right, it’s a Tropical vessel on that route. You seem to know shipping lines, which is a good thing. No pirates so far, thankfully. Although we received signal of an attack on a vessel passing through higher-risk areas, our Captain was able to direct us through a safer route. I’ve previously witnessed pirate attacks on different occasions and can confidently say that it’s not a pleasant experience, the most recent attack resulted in the deaths of 5 members of my crew.

We have been busy offloading the product, while the remains are being shared amongst myself and two senior colleagues, that’s how we make extra money each time a shipment is made. I’m sharing this information with you because i trust you, so please keep this a secret between us, okay?

So the senior people get a share.

Today, the message:

Hello dear, i’m doing well and you? Today i met with the local buyer and sold my share of the crude for $1,950,000, but I’m disappointed because the buyer was unable to pay via BTC, which is the standard and safest method and instead, handed me cash because most of the local buyers are uneducated and find it difficult to conduct transactions online. We’ll start sailing back tomorrow and when i return home, i plan on getting you an expensive gift since you make me happy and i want you happy as well.

So the crew member’s share is almost $2 million!! That’s just the “extra money” they make.

My friend knows it’s a scam and is playing with the guy. This isn’t her first rodeo and she strings them along for a while. But it will end soon.

US $2M weighs 4400 lbs.

That can’t be right. Not if you assume $100 bills. Each bill is about 2 grams so about 20 kg, or 44 lbs.

Yeah – I didn’t realize I was calculating for $1 bills. It’s too early in the a.m.!

I know I haven’t posted here for a while, the advance fees scams have moved to asking for payment on first contact. No payment, no further contact.
I have attracted the attention of romance scammers but their messages tend to be insanely long but I can keep them going for weeks. Who knew I could be so good at playing a desperately lonely old man?

I did get a message today from someone wishing a long list a happy new year. (And now the idiots are responding to the email with “reply all”.)
He neglected to make the recipient list a BCC so I went through it all and found some interesting names.

First off, I spotted some obvious references to our own @Mangetout.

mange_trout
John Warosa [john.barosa.xxxxx@xxxxx.com]
Manfred [manfred.barosa@xxxxxxx.com]
Davis Bon [davis.bon@xxxxxxx.com]

Then some that might be potential scambaiters.
Notay Honaypout
maru_kobayashi
Ass McCock
spambox[spambox@xxxxxxxxxxxxx.com]
2 different emails @malspam.uk
scameru@[xxxxxx.com]
'Uge Wanka [simon.hallett@xxxxx.uk]
Samuel Langhorne Clemens van Keamstards
Rob Johnson [spamcollector84685@xxxxxxxx]
penisman
Basil GoLightly [cherkicentral@xxxxxxx]
(Breakfast at Tiffany’s)