# Scary stalker house mates. GRRRRR **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 15, 2002, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854 "2002-11-15T11:11:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Squirebob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Squirebob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squirebob)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2002, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/21 "2002-11-16T12:26:39Z")
Very sorry i was not aware that all posts were required to gramaticaly correct, sorry if I upset your taste i didn’t know your level of pomposity reguarding a light hearted post. My humble appologies of master of the the English Language… ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2002, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/22 "2002-11-16T12:30:26Z")
It’s not pomposity - it’s just that you’re making yourself look thick. “My humble appologies of master of the the English Language” - WTF 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Squirebob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Squirebob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squirebob)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2002, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/23 "2002-11-16T12:37:52Z")
As i said for god sake this isnt a bloody essay if i was posting on a topic that wasn’t meant to be funny then your criticism would bewell founded. I really dont mind if people think i am thick that is their own oppinion and who am I too proove them wrong… ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2002, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/24 "2002-11-16T13:11:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Squirebob \* > \*\*who am I too proove them wrong… \*\* Precisely. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2002, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/25 "2002-11-16T13:16:15Z")
It’s not that I give a flying fuck about your grammar, the truth is I’m worried about you. You can’t communicate for shit. I had to guess at large sections of your story. I got the main point, but mainly through a bit of extrapolation and not because I could understand your point directly. You are like a low functioning Jack Tripper in a demented Three’s Company episode, and I’m worried that burley-woman will take advantage of you. Call your Uncle Waverly if you need help. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2002, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/26 "2002-11-17T03:36:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Squirebob \* > \*\*As i said for god sake this isnt a bloody essay if i was posting on a topic that wasn’t meant to be funny then your criticism would bewell founded. \*\* **Is** this meant to be funny? ---
**Author:** ![cherry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cherry)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2002, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/27 "2002-11-17T03:51:41Z")
So what happened? Did you guys go out and sort it out? ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_The\_Diver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Buck\_The\_Diver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_The_Diver)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2002, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/28 "2002-11-17T04:17:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Squirebob \* > \*\* i am trying to be nice to the scary hose mate \*\* Now she’s a _hose_ mate? I’m confused. I thought you two weren’t hitting it off. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2002, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/29 "2002-11-17T04:41:28Z")
Ouch. I shall offer my best guess as to what the OP intended to communicate. I will try to refrain from correcting style, and merely content myself with rendering it into an approximation of english. This is done not only as a public service, but also as a byproduct of my honest attempts to determine for myself if there is enough information in the post to make independant semiosis a practical possibility. > [@](#): > > Well, Dopers, here is my sad tale: > > I used to be a happy-go-lucky student in the wonderland that is Sunderland, in the UK. That is, until I moved into my new student house with three friends and a girl with whom I was reasonably familiar. > > Sounds like fun, eh…? > > PAH. > > Well, like the soppy-headed fool that I am, I fell for the girl with whom I was reasonably familiar. > > Cunningly, at the same time, my scary, built-like-a-small-developing-nation beast of a house-mate, (one of my original friends,) [list=a][li]Decided she liked me.[_]Decided she wanted to try to jump me at any given moment. [_]Lost the ability to recognize when a cause is lost.[/list]To make things easier to explain: I am crazy about girl #1, and I fear girl #2 like Satan himself.[/li] > We go out together a fair bit as a household, and three weeks ago there was a theme-night at our local student club. Whoooo! My friends and I arranged to meet girl #1 in the club, and when we met her, I started dancing with her. It was nice, kinda-leading-up-to-a-kiss dancing. Just as I moved in for the smooch, a hand with the power of steel grabbed me 'round the neck and dragged me away, arms outsretched toward the lovely girl #1. I turned to see my abuser, and there she was: the towering form of girl #2. At first I thought that there was a power-cut, but then I realised that the light that she didn’t block out was being forced to orbit her, pulled in by forces unknown. [ed. note-- “gravity” may be indicated.] This went on for the next four hours, making it completely clear to me that I wouldn’t go near girl #2 with a shitty stick. She still wasn’t allowing me near girl #1. > > Now, I am not a heartless guy-- I was, and still am, friends with girl #2, but she is making it very hard to spend time with her, as she keeps trying to violate me. > > In the weeks since then, girl #2 has been trying to put girl #1 off of me by saying that I’m nasty to women, (which I’m not at all,) and that I only go for Norwegian women. (I admit to a liking for my ex, who was from that Scandinavian country, but that hardly constitutes a fetish.) As a result, girl #1 has been distant, and not her usual flirty self. > > I know that it would be hard for girl #2 if I established a relationship with girl #1, and I’ve tried sitting her down and explaining myself to her, but it’s like trying to explain economic policy to George Bush. > > Well, this is my stalemate. > > Hopefully, tonight, as girl #2 is away, and me and girl #1 have managed to arrange to go out, things may change-- but I’m not optimistic. **Squirebob** , you should know that folks are expected to meet a certain _minimum_ standard of communications skills to post here, or they’ll likely be hooted off the boards. That’s not to say we’re _all_ completely “anal” about language, (although I’ll readily admit that _I_ am,) but I think a good rule-of-thumb is that if people have a hard time figuring out what you’re trying to say, a good percentage of them are going to get their backs up, and many more will simply ignore you. Do take a _little_ care, or take it to the Yahoo! chat rooms, where that sort of abuse of the English language won’t raise any eyebrows. That being said, I sincerely hope that you find true love, or at least get a little action. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Lucki\_Chaarms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lucki\_Chaarms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucki_Chaarms)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2002, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/30 "2002-11-17T04:52:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Buck The Diver \* > \*\* > > Now she’s a _hose_ mate? I’m confused. I thought you two weren’t hitting it off. :eek: \*\* I read that typo and thought “Psycho Hose Beast” a la _Wayne’s World_ LC ---
**Author:** ![JonScribe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3be4f8/32.png) [@JonScribe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JonScribe)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2002, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/31 "2002-11-17T06:14:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Larry Mudd \* > \*\*Ouch. > > I shall offer my best guess as to what the OP intended to communicate. > 😉 \*\* Thanks, Larry. That was clear as Mudd. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2002, 10:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/32 "2002-11-17T10:45:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Squirebob \* > \*\*As i said for god sake this isnt a bloody essay if i was posting on a topic that wasn’t meant to be funny then your criticism would bewell founded. I really dont mind if people think i am thick that is their own oppinion and who am I too proove them wrong… \*\* Wah diddle bedoit. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2002, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854/33 "2002-11-17T10:46:17Z")
Good Lord, through the filter of **Larry** , the OP takes on a fair degree of wit. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scary-stalker-house-mates-grrrrr/136854.md?page=1)