# Scenes From a Second Grade Cafeteria (in two colors!) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 4, 2004, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444 "2004-10-04T11:37:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/1 "2004-10-04T11:37:04Z")
Hey Soupo! I saved you a seat! Come on over and eat lunch with me!" “OK Jack, I will! I should really eat lunch with Katie like I told her I would, but since I haven’t hit puberty yet your offer sounds better.” “That’s just great. Hey Soup’ old buddy, whatcha got for lunch today?” “My Dad packed me a good lunch today. Toast! I got toast for lunch.” “Wow, you’re lucky! What do you have to drink with that toast?” “Drink? And dilute my enjoyment of this toasty goodness? It is to laugh!” “Yeah, I guess you’re right… So, how’s about a lunch trade?” “I dunno… I mean I have _toast_ today! Whatchu got to trade with that?” “Umm… let’s see… to start with I have a Thermos™ of Beef Consomme with Fall Vegetable Julienne…” “With carrots and parsnips?” “Yeah.” “What else?” “It looks like a Cornish Game Hen stuffed with wild rice.” “Cornish Game Hen, or _Rock_ Cornish Game Hen?” “They’re both the same thing.” “Really?” “Yeah.” “Oh. I wasn’t sure.” “And for dessert I’ve got some ‘tarte au chocolate et aux framboises’ and a black cherry Kool-Aid® juice pouch to wash it all down with.” “Wow, that sounds… French. The ‘tarte’ thing anyway. The Kool-Aid® sounds normal enough.” “Doesn’t it though?” “Yeah. So that’s your lunch?” “Yeah.” “You poor bastard.” “I _know_! So, do you think we can trade?” “I’m not sure… I mean I _do_ have toast for lunch. I think I’ll just eat what I brought. But don’t look so glum, chum. I’ll ask my Dad to make a second piece for tomorrow and I’ll give it to you.” “You will?” “Yeah, sure.” “Wow Soupo, you’re the _best_ friend a guy could ask for.” “Yeah, I know… I know.” Soupo never does trade his lunch away. I just pack a good one I guess. -Rue. _I’d like to thank **Javamaven** for all her help with this week’s MMP. Java is so pretty and helpful and nice and stuff. I secretly love her._ ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/2 "2004-10-04T11:39:55Z")
> [@Rue DeDay](#): > > _I’d like to thank **Javamaven** for all her help with this week’s MMP. Java is so pretty and helpful and nice and stuff. I secretly love her._ I’m guessing she’s the one who helped you with the coloring. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/3 "2004-10-04T11:44:52Z")
**Rue** what I need to know is, is this fresh toast or old toast you leave sittin’ in the toaster. You are know to do that ya know. Also, is it plain toast or toast with butter? Or is the butter just for special occasions. Jack’s parental units should be dragged off and shot for pawning parsnips off on the poor little feller. No seven year old should have to endure such abuse. The color’s were real purty. I second what **Shibb** said. **Javamaven** musta helped with the coloring cause we all know you have trouble staying within the lines. -swampbear (have I told y’all I’m going on a Carribbean cruise next week? It’s my midlife crisis) ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/4 "2004-10-04T11:55:10Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > -swampbear (have I told y’all I’m going on a Carribbean cruise next week? It’s my midlife crisis) You scheduled your midlife crisis? Now that’s efficient. I’ll be in Cincinnati later this week. Maybe I’ll pop up to **Rue** ’s and steal his toaster. ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/5 "2004-10-04T12:22:06Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > I second what **Shibb** said. **Javamaven** musta helped with the coloring cause we all know you have trouble staying within the lines. Hey! That was _my_ joke! You stole my joke! Bastard. and you can have my toaster **Shibb** , when you pry it from my cold, dead hands. Although my dead hands won’t be all that cold if I forget I’m carrying around my toaster again, and take it into the shower with me. ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/6 "2004-10-04T12:32:12Z")
Well, since **Rue** was able to color in two colors AND stay between the lines, I think he should get a **Gold** Star for the day! Now if we could only stop him from playing doctor at recess. ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/7 "2004-10-04T12:36:11Z")
As if playing Post Office would be much of an improvement. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/8 "2004-10-04T12:37:13Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > You scheduled your midlife crisis? Now that’s efficient. I’ll be in Cincinnati later this week. Maybe I’ll pop up to **Rue** ’s and steal his toaster. **Shibb** you are cruel and heartless! If you steal **Rue’s** toaster what’s poor **Soupo** gonna have for lunch? Just a plain old piece of bread? He’ll be the laughingstock of second grade! He’ll probably wind up homeless somehwhere on a street corner eating parsnips out of dumpsters. Do you want that on your conscious? Yep, me and three friends all scheduled our midlife crisis’s (crisises?) for next week. Actually, we intend on this being part one of our collective midlife crisis. The next part will be a trip to Cancun sometime next year. It’s all ingenious really. We go off somewheres have our crisis, come back home and no one’s the wiser. Exept that I just announced it on a public message board, so the possibility of lots of people knowing I’m having a midlife crisis is now pretty good. So what! I deserve a midlife crisis and I’m gonna have one. So There! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/9 "2004-10-04T12:42:32Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > -swampbear (have I told y’all I’m going on a Carribbean cruise next week? It’s my midlife crisis) Goin’ solo, **Swampy**? How about a consumer report on the cruise when you get back? I’ve been thinking of a cruise myself whenever I get some money built back up; previous unemployment and present poverty sucks, ya know. 'Cept, if I went on a cruise, I’d leave from Nawfick becuz it’s across the river, and VunderWife hates to fly. I would also like to announce that I, too, will not be around next week. I’m not going to say exactly why. Every other time I tried to brag about closing out a recurrent soap opera-esque element of my life, the deal fell through. Therefore, I’ll stay mum until it’s over. **Rue** , we’ll be passing through Cinncinnati Monday afternoon. Be sure to listen for us honking at you. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/10 "2004-10-04T12:44:34Z")
Oops, simulpost… **Swampy** and 3 buds… ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/11 "2004-10-04T12:48:30Z")
> [@welby](#): > > Now if we could only stop him from playing doctor at recess. - GASP \* Don’t stop him from playing doctor! I was just thinking it was time to get a new toaters. We have had ours for almost 10 years, since the start of this school year we use it every morning, three times. Yesterday I noticed it takes a long time for the bread to even get tan. Tomorrow when I go get groceries, I will probably stop and look at new toasters. ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/12 "2004-10-04T12:51:16Z")
[QUOTE=misstee] toaters. QUOTE] toa_S_ter ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/13 "2004-10-04T12:52:32Z")
It is sooo Monday. You guys will forgive me, won’t you? ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/14 "2004-10-04T12:55:12Z")
> [@misstee](#): > > - GASP \* > Don’t stop him from playing doctor! Doctor’s for nap time when the teacher’s not looking. He should be running around and playing and what-not when he’s at recess. ---
**Author:** ![Francesca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/15 "2004-10-04T14:02:34Z")
I still have my toast bonnet. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/16 "2004-10-04T14:04:31Z")
> [@Francesca](#): > > I still have my toast bonnet. :dubious: WTH is a toast bonnet? Put bread in the front of the car, and it toasts while you drive? ---
**Author:** ![Francesca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/17 "2004-10-04T14:05:38Z")
It’s a bonnet hat made of toast. Tcha! Who doesn’t know _that_? ---
**Author:** ![merrily](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@merrily](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/merrily)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/18 "2004-10-04T14:18:18Z")
If…Soupo got toast in his lunch box, And…if Mrs. De Day had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in her briefcase, Then…what did Rue have on his breakfast plate? ---
**Author:** ![JavaMaven1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@JavaMaven1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JavaMaven1)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/19 "2004-10-04T14:33:37Z")
Aw, shucks. Now I understand the Kool-Aid question. And here I was giving you all kinds of lovely wine suggestions… ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2004, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444/20 "2004-10-04T15:06:18Z")
**Rue** , my dear… …admit this to me. You designed this whole OP to bring our dear **Francesca** out of lurkerdom, didn’t you? Toast bonnet, indeed. 🙂 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scenes-from-a-second-grade-cafeteria-in-two-colors/267444.md?page=2)