# Sci-fi inventions the world is better off without **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 22, 2005, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815 "2005-12-22T16:55:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/41 "2005-12-23T05:33:34Z")
> [@Diceman](#): > > Replicators, as seen in Star Trek. We are led to believe that, because of this technology, nobody has to work anymore. But think about that for a minute. What would you do with your life if you didn’t have to work anymore? You might enjoy hiking in the woods, but would you really want to spend every day doing that? You might enjoy travelling, but after a couple of years of constant travel, wouldn’t the places all start to look the same? It seems to me that life would get to be pretty boring and unsatisfying. I know that many people who retire find that they hate it, and get a part-time job at Wal-Mart or something just because they can’t stand sitting around the house all day. > > Life in the Federation must be a constant stuggle to fend off boredom in any way possible. What you have just said is that you are only happy when you are doing what someone else has told you to do. I can’t agree that the undoubted good of a replicator as seen in Star Trek® should be dispensed with because you can’t take responsibility for your life. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/42 "2005-12-23T05:41:34Z")
X ray glasses. Oh, yeah, they LOOK like fun. Undress all the women you see with them, all unknown to them. But sooner or later, you’re going to want to get REALLY intrusive and look beneath their skins, and THEN you’ll realize that no matter how attractive an exterior a woman may have, all of them are full of disgusting lumpy organs bathed in goo (just like men). THAT’LL put a damper on things. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/43 "2005-12-23T11:18:09Z")
> [@wevets](#): > > I was just thinking today about Leinster’s (spelled poorly - my apologies) _A Logic Named Joe_ and how close we’ve come to that with PCs and the Internet. But at least your PC doesn’t figure out all the possible ways you could get caught and only choose the method of murder described on the internet that won’t let them ever figure it out. > > So I’m gonna go with superhuman AI. > BTW, Niven’s organlegging and wireheading - is that from a story called _Gil the ARM_ or something like that? I loved that story. They’re the major plot elements in the “Gil the ARM” stories, of which Niven wrote three IIRC. Also “The Jigsaw Man”, which charts the course of a condemned criminal trying to escape consignment to the organ tanks on a charge of red light violation. See, once society has the chance of living forever on the back of condemned criminals’ organs, there’s going to be a lot of condemned criminals, on whatever crimes can be put on the books. ---
**Author:** ![TPWombat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbce88/32.png) [@TPWombat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TPWombat)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/44 "2005-12-23T11:45:18Z")
> [@Fish](#): > > My vote is for those automagical bone-knitting devices and tissue repairererer thingies the Star Trek doctors always have. Wave a blue glowie over a patient and their bones are healed and their extravasations and aneurysms are fixed. Scott Adams observed that if these existed people would sneak up behind you and seal up your ass. ---
**Author:** ![Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sophistry_and_Illusion)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/45 "2005-12-23T11:59:33Z")
Ice-9. But that’s kind of cheating, since the whole point of Ice-9 is that it was a terrible idea to make it in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/46 "2005-12-23T12:00:32Z")
Niven mentions wireheading in some of his ‘known space’ universe short stories and it features prominently in the _Ringworld_ series, because The main character, Louis Wu, is a reformed wirehead; the mental fortitude he gained by his triumph over this seemingly inescapable addiction allowed him to resist the lure of the PAK root, as well as generally instilling him with stoicism ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/47 "2005-12-23T12:26:02Z")
> [@Podkayne](#): > > Goin’ 'way back to the Gaslight Era: food pills. They’d be cool for disaster situations, or for convenience on those days when you’re too busy to stop for lunch, but imagine what it would be like if food pills displaced _actual food_! How awful! Who wrote the old, old, short, short story where food pills had replaced food, and the whole family was gathered around a table (why?) for the Thanksgiving division of the pill, which was a Wonka-esque gimmick that would give each family member the sensual experience and nutrition of a lavish feast. As dad gets ready to “carve” the pill with a razor, he slips up and the pill rolls down the table to the infant, who grabs it and swallows it whole. The entire family looks on in horror as the baby looks momentarily pleased and then explodes. I remember a teacher reading that to the glass in grade three or four. Made quite an impression. ---
**Author:** ![mojave66](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@mojave66](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mojave66)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/48 "2005-12-23T13:34:48Z")
“jacking” into a computer network by using direct neural contact (a UPS port in your head! 2.0 even!) There isn’t a firewall that could be created to make it safe enough. The idea of your brain on Windows Thetan… brrrrr. ---
**Author:** ![crazyjoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f14d63/32.png) [@crazyjoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crazyjoe)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/49 "2005-12-23T16:03:35Z")
You think Star Trek Replicators are bad, wait till you see the ones from Stargate SG-1. ---
**Author:** ![Sweetums](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Sweetums](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sweetums)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/50 "2005-12-23T17:29:45Z")
I always thought the good old Star Trek transporter was one of those “good idea, but bad in practice” things. Think about it. Every season of every show seems to have at least one episode where the transporter goes haywire and creates an evil duplicate, or de-ages someone, or plunks them into an alternate reality. ``` Think about this, if it is that comon for thais kind of weirdness to happen on the ships we are seeing, (usally the "best in the fleet") how often does this stuff happen in the rest of starfleet? This is supposed to be established, everyday tech, but if these sort of mishaps are as comon as we see on the show, why isn't the Federation overrun with the nightmarish results of transporter malfunctions? ``` ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/51 "2005-12-23T17:38:17Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > Woody Allen’s Orgasmatron. > > Not that I wouldn’t give my left hand to own one. Because you sure as hell wouldn’t be needing it anymore… unless you’re a “righty” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![chrisk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@chrisk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chrisk)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/52 "2005-12-23T17:54:28Z")
> [@Sweetums](#): > > ``` > Think about this, if it is that comon for thais kind of weirdness to happen on the ships we are seeing, (usally the "best in the fleet") how often does this stuff happen in the rest of starfleet? This is supposed to be established, everyday tech, but if these sort of mishaps are as comon as we see on the show, why isn't the Federation overrun with the nightmarish results of transporter malfunctions? > > ``` Oh, but a lot of the time the weirdness happens because they’re the first ship off exploring some strange bit of technobabble, so a lot of the ships that are just on routine supply runs or whatever would have significantly less chance of running into them. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/53 "2005-12-23T18:07:02Z")
> [@cbawlmer](#): > > Maybe video would be a nice option, like a webcam, but I never want it to be automatic. I predict that this technology will eventually be combined with motion capture such that you can project a different face on the other party’s screen. You’ll be in front of your video pickup; your computer will read the position of your eyes, mouth, eyebrows, etc., and map this onto a 3D model of a head and face. When you answer your call, the other party will see you as a gorilla, or Homer Simpson, or Julius Caesar (Civ III version). You’ll show your actual face only to friends and family, people you know and trust; everybody else gets Jar-Jar Binks. Today we download ring tones; tomorrow we’ll download phoneheads. ---
**Author:** ![Cornelius\_Tuggerson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/13edae/32.png) [@Cornelius\_Tuggerson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cornelius_Tuggerson)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/54 "2005-12-23T18:09:55Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Besides, they’d have to have some sort of rudimentary intelligence, and what if they somehow developed self-awareness and a sense of enslavement? Nobody needs another Cylon War. Little known fact - the first [published work](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rossums_Universal_Robots) to popularize the word “robot” dealt with that very scenario. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/55 "2005-12-23T18:27:10Z")
> [@Sweetums](#): > > I always thought the good old Star Trek transporter was one of those “good idea, but bad in practice” things. Think about it. Every season of every show seems to have at least one episode where the transporter goes haywire and creates an evil duplicate, or de-ages someone, or plunks them into an alternate reality. > > ``` > Think about this, if it is that comon for thais kind of weirdness to happen on the ships we are seeing, (usally the "best in the fleet") how often does this stuff happen in the rest of starfleet? This is supposed to be established, everyday tech, but if these sort of mishaps are as comon as we see on the show, why isn't the Federation overrun with the nightmarish results of transporter malfunctions? > > ``` I think ST transporters were so weirdness-prone because the writers used them as plot devices. If the technology were possible in the real world (which I seriously doubt), I don’t believe Kirk-type weirdness would happen with any regularity, simply because we’d wise up and not use the transporter as much till the kinks were out. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/56 "2005-12-23T18:32:07Z")
> [@cbawlmer](#): > > I realize these already exist to a certain extent, but I hope they never become the norm: the videophone. The last thing I want is to have to get dressed to answer the telephone, and I like the option of telling the caller that I’m really busy, just walking out the door, have something on the stove, etc. if I’m done talking. Videophones would also make the “tell im I’m not here” game more difficult if you’re visible in the background. Maybe video would be a nice option, like a webcam, but I never want it to be automatic. I recall an issue of the Avengers from the late 80s-early 90s in which the team got a message in the middle of the night; the Wasp, then team leader, flew straight from her bedroom to answer the video-phone. When Hercules (or possibly the Black Knight) pointed out that she was in her nightie, she shrugged it off, saying that the phone was programmed to always show them as being in costume no matter what they were actually wearing. We won’t see video-phones in wide use till we can do THAT. ---
**Author:** ![Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bc8723/32.png) [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/57 "2005-12-23T18:38:50Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > Today we download ring tones; tomorrow we’ll download phoneheads. Already being worked on, actually. Ooo, I thought of another tech we would do better without: full voice-recognition for computers. a) emails and message board posts would become even more insulting, with more flames, until _nuance_ recognition became available — and the problem would now extend to business letters, official government correspondence, and so on b) spying and wiretapping would become automated c) everybody and his brother would suddenly have to dictate the Great Um, American Book Thingy, and the publishing market would be flooded with evidence of _why those people weren’t writing before_ ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/58 "2005-12-23T19:00:10Z")
What’s a Shrike? ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/59 "2005-12-23T19:11:22Z")
Whoops. That last post should have been in response to : > [@Mr. Blue Sky](#): > > I’d hate to have to deal with a Shrike. ---
**Author:** ![Pazu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pazu/32/15522_2.png) [@Pazu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pazu)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2005, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815/60 "2005-12-23T20:09:34Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Robots/androids to do all the nonintellectual work, for the same reasons **Diceman** mentioned regarding replicators. The boredom for many people with nothing to do would be stifling. Besides, they’d have to have some sort of rudimentary intelligence, and what if they somehow developed self-awareness and a sense of enslavement? Nobody needs another Cylon War. cf. “With Folded Hands”, by Jack Williamson. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sci-fi-inventions-the-world-is-better-off-without/336815.md?page=4)