# Science fiction idea I had
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Tags:** books-writing-myths
**Created:** [November 15, 2022, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921 "2022-11-15T02:20:02Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/1 "2022-11-15T02:20:02Z")
So, I had an amusing idea for a science fiction short story. At long last, we discover that we are not alone in the Universe: There’s a sentient species on a planet orbiting Vega. And it turns out they’re a lot like us. Their biochemistry is even based on more or less the same amino acids as ours.
Well, as so often happens when cultures meet, some humans eventually go to live on their world, and vice-versa. One enterprising immigrant to Earth decides to set up a restaurant serving xis people’s cuisine, which is based on the flesh of organisms about as closely related to them as pigs and cows are to us. And of course, xe bills it as an authentic Vegan restaurant.
But PETA gets wind of this, and sues him for false advertising, since it’s meat, not vegan. It goes to court, and the restauranteur eventually wins… not because “Vegan” means “of Vega”, but because Vegan organisms are alien to Earth, with a completely different ancestry than anything here, and so they can’t be a member of kingdom Animalia. So all of the food in that restaurant is, in fact, technically vegan.
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### Author:  [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/2 "2022-11-15T02:53:26Z")
Following that line of thinking. The Earthlings could ask a whole lot of Vegans to come visit, and then cook them as “authentic Vegan cuisine.”
Of course, the big finish to the story is when one of the Vegans, about to board the ship to Earth, finally gets a translation of the Earthlings’ manual and screams, “TO SERVE VEGAN - IT’S A COOKBOOK!”
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### Author:  [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/3 "2022-11-15T03:27:26Z")
I’d read it!
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### Author:  [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/4 "2022-11-15T05:10:25Z")
Yes, but how much space dust is on that book?
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### Author:  [@Dr.Strangelove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Strangelove)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/5 "2022-11-15T05:39:56Z")
Where is the FDA in all of this? Vegan food won’t fit any of their classifications. Maybe they can call it a “supplement” instead of a food product.
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### Author:  [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/6 "2022-11-15T06:56:54Z")
Then it comes to light that the restaurant owner isn’t even from the Vega system, he and his staff are all Tau Cetis! So social media rallies against them and shuts their Tau asses down.
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### Author:  [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/7 "2022-11-15T07:15:36Z")
> [@Chronos](#):
>
> Well, as so often happens when cultures meet, some humans eventually go to live on their world, and vice-versa.
Wouldn’t the Vegans be considered “aliens” under US immigration law? How did they manage to not only gain residency, but set up a restaurant business?
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### Author:  [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 8:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/8 "2022-11-15T08:50:24Z")
There would be a reciprocity system presumably, whereby earthers could be legal residents of the alien planet and vice versa.
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### Author:  [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/9 "2022-11-15T11:47:49Z")
> [@Dr.Strangelove](#):
>
> Where is the FDA in all of this? Vegan food won’t fit any of their classifications.
Hm, that part hadn’t occurred to me… But if it doesn’t fall into any FDA classifications, maybe it wouldn’t even be in their jurisdiction?
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### Author:  [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/10 "2022-11-15T14:16:03Z")
Does the guy running the Vegan diner have a third eye under his cap?
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### Author:  [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/11 "2022-11-15T15:12:14Z")
This idea made me think of the short story “The R-Strain” by Harry Turtledove about a genetically engineered pig that chewed its cud. A rabbi was asked if it was kosher. The rabbi ruled yes, because it had both cloven hooves and chewed its cud. However, since it couldn’t interbreed with regular pigs, it wasn’t a true pig. Note that this story was written before a wild swine that chewed its cud was discovered.
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### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/12 "2022-11-15T15:30:05Z")
> [@Chronos](#):
>
> But PETA gets wind of this, and sues him for false advertising, since it’s meat, not vegan. It goes to court, and the restauranteur eventually wins… not because “Vegan” means “of Vega”, but because Vegan organisms are alien to Earth, with a completely different ancestry than anything here, and so they can’t be a member of kingdom Animalia. So all of the food in that restaurant is, in fact, technically vegan.
You know, I used this as the basis for one of my sig lines on this board over fifteen years ago.
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### Author:  [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/13 "2022-11-15T15:59:57Z")
Is Vegan meat kosher? Is Vegan meat even meat? This is an existential question. Do Vegans dream of electric sheep? Do they sing the body electric? If Vegan Samsa woke up one morning transformed into a giant cockroach, would Samsa be cockroach or Vegan? And would Vegan cockroach be high in protein?
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### Author:  [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/14 "2022-11-15T17:59:02Z")
> [@Kent\_Clark](#):
>
> Do Vegans dream of electric sheep?
Do Vegans dream of electric meat?
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### Author:  [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/15 "2022-11-15T18:57:37Z")
“They’ll get Campbell’s and like it!”
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### Author:  [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/16 "2022-11-15T22:42:18Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#):
>
> You know, I used this as the basis for one of my sig lines on this board over fifteen years ago.
Oh, yeah, I remember your sig lines, those were classic!
Do you happen to have the text of this one still?
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### Author:  [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/17 "2022-11-15T22:56:07Z")
“SOYLENT GREEN IS VEGANs”
Vegetarians: “Oh, cool.”
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### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/18 "2022-11-15T22:57:11Z")
> [@Chronos](#):
>
> Oh, yeah, I remember your sig lines, those were classic!
>
> Do you happen to have the text of this one still?
Why, thank you for that.
I did record some of my sig lines in a file, including this one:
> [@](#):
>
> Ironically, the inhabitants of the planets in the star system of Vega turned out to be carnivorous, and especially liked eating people from Earth.
Unfortunately, I didn’t record the dates this one was up.
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### Author:  [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/19 "2022-11-15T22:58:20Z")
Except, in the original, Soylent Green was… soy and lentils. Just like the name suggests.
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### Author:  [@Dr.Strangelove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Strangelove)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2022, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/science-fiction-idea-i-had/974921/20 "2022-11-15T22:59:27Z")
Can we eat the Vegans themselves? It’s a well-established fact that the smarter the meat, the more delicious it is. See: insects-\>fish-\>poultry-\>mammals. Intelligent Vegans are probably very tasty but without the problem of giving me a nasty prion disease.
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