# Scientifically inaccurate songs
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [October 12, 2005, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882 "2005-10-12T12:54:04Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 9
### Author:  [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2005, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/161 "2005-10-16T21:14:21Z")
Come on, now, love’s fantastic, but can it _really_ put you “at the **Top of the World**?”
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### Author:  [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)
#### Post date: [October 17, 2005, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/162 "2005-10-17T04:02:06Z")
> [@Case Sensitive](#):
>
> Not to mention an awesome command of esoteric bad rock lyrics. This is definitely one of the best threads in a long time.
Glad to hear that the voices that keep me awake in the middle of the night can serve as inspiration to you all, too.
Keep 'em coming!
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### Author:  [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)
#### Post date: [October 17, 2005, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/163 "2005-10-17T04:38:03Z")
> [@OtakuLoki](#):
>
> **Scott Plaid** , you have to give The Police credit for not “Walking on Starshine.” At least they were describing walking on a real surface.
Do you mean “Walking on Sunshine”?
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### Author:  [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)
#### Post date: [October 17, 2005, 9:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/164 "2005-10-17T09:23:05Z")
> [@Superdude](#):
>
> Glad to hear that the voices that keep me awake in the middle of the night can serve as inspiration to you all, too.
They’re driving you insane? Those men inside your brain?
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### Author:  [@mamboman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mamboman)
#### Post date: [October 18, 2005, 8:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/165 "2005-10-18T08:38:38Z")
Not strictly _scientifically_ impossible, but how does one shoot a man in Reno (for whatever reason, but “just to watch him die” is as good as any) and end up in a California State Prison? Am I missing something?
mm
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### Author:  [@Corner\_Case](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corner_Case)
#### Post date: [October 18, 2005, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/166 "2005-10-18T19:20:36Z")
I do not believe it is possible to leviate and be _walking with my feet ten feet off of Beale._
Even the most gullible of Papa’s should be able to distinguish between a clear and an opaque substance. _And if that diamond ring turns brass_ then one should definitely report a case of fraud - or consult a metalurgist.
The tree top, being the outermost of secondary branches, is probably not structurally sound enough to support the weight of a cradle. While a cradle might be placed in equilibrium, I do not believe any appreciable wind could be tolerated. However, the breaking of the bough and subsequent actions are consistent with the physics of the situation.
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### Author:  [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)
#### Post date: [October 18, 2005, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/167 "2005-10-18T19:31:41Z")
> [@Max Carnage](#):
>
> “Fly Me To The Moon”
There’s another inaccuracy in that song:
> [@](#):
>
> Let me see what spring is like on Jupiter and Mars
[Jupiter is inclined at an angle of only 3.13 degrees to the plane of its orbit](http://nssdc.gsfc.nasa.gov/planetary/factsheet/jupiterfact.html). That means that Jupiter wouldn’t have noticeable seasons like Earth does, unless you were at one of the poles.
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### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [October 18, 2005, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/168 "2005-10-18T20:31:02Z")
> [@](#):
>
> I do not believe it is possible to leviate and be walking with my feet ten feet off of Beale.
Maybe not, but you could easily be ten feet off to either side. That’s still “ten feet off of Beale”.
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### Author:  [@kidchameleon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidchameleon)
#### Post date: [October 18, 2005, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/169 "2005-10-18T21:09:58Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#):
>
> Neither the Rockin’ Pneumonia nor the Boogie Woogie Blues is generally accepted in the medical community as an actual malady.
What about Cat Scratch Fever?
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### Author:  [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)
#### Post date: [October 18, 2005, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/170 "2005-10-18T22:41:07Z")
> [@mamboman](#):
>
> Not strictly _scientifically_ impossible, but how does one shoot a man in Reno (for whatever reason, but “just to watch him die” is as good as any) and end up in a California State Prison? Am I missing something?
>
> mm
_[Cough](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=306241)_
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### Author:  [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)
#### Post date: [October 18, 2005, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/171 "2005-10-18T22:50:49Z")
“There’s a skeleton choking on a crust of breeeeeaaaad…”
Um…skeletons don’t have a throat, much less an epiglottis. Sheesh.
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### Author:  [@panamajack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panamajack)
#### Post date: [October 18, 2005, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/172 "2005-10-18T23:57:25Z")
> [@kidchameleon](#):
>
> What about Cat Scratch Fever?
Of course [Cat Scratch Fever](http://www.winnfelinehealth.org/health/csd.html) is real, but upon further review of the lyrics, there are other issues.
At the time he wrote the song, its cause was indeed unknown (“I don’t know where they come from”), though the bacteria resposible has since been discovered. It is indeed mild in most people (“nothing dangerous”). It is unlikely to cause insanity as he suggests, however.
His claim that after the doctor gave him the cure, he “got it some more” is unclear. If the treatment was antibiotics, this wouldn’t prolong the illness, but it is possible that the same kitty that lived next door to him still had the bacteria after he was treated, and repeated contact caused a later infection.
On the other hand, repeated experiments have shown that guitars used at a distance of 60 paces have little to no effect on rhinoceros testicles.
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### Author:  [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)
#### Post date: [October 19, 2005, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/173 "2005-10-19T13:13:01Z")
> [@Bryan Ekers](#):
>
> How the _fuck_ did Janet get an autograph _from the sun?!_ That paper would’ve burned right up!
She went at night, obviously.
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### Author:  [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)
#### Post date: [October 19, 2005, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/174 "2005-10-19T13:16:20Z")
I’ve been to the desert, and there _was_ someone for to give me no pain.
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### Author:  [@Caricci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caricci)
#### Post date: [October 19, 2005, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/175 "2005-10-19T14:09:57Z")
> [@zagloba](#):
>
> And Stonehenge is not, in fact, 12 inches tall.
Or 18, for that matter.
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### Author:  [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)
#### Post date: [October 19, 2005, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/176 "2005-10-19T14:12:23Z")
> [@5que](#):
>
> I’ve been to the desert, and there _was_ someone for to give me no pain.
“40,000 men and women every day.”
When Donald Roeser wrote this in 1976 or so, he was guessing at the worldwide death rate. From the sources I coud find, the death rate per day in the 1970’s was roughly 3 times that number.
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### Author:  [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)
#### Post date: [October 19, 2005, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/177 "2005-10-19T14:13:25Z")
I didn’t intend to quote 5que’s post.
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### Author:  [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)
#### Post date: [October 19, 2005, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/178 "2005-10-19T15:14:14Z")
(1) _The lock upon my garden gate’s a snail, that’s what it is._
The properties of snail mucus and foot structure allow snails to adhere to vertical and inverted surfaces, even while moving. However, this adherence is not strong enough to serve as an effective lock.
(2) _Caterpillar sheds his skin to find a butterfly within._
A caterpillar sheds its skin as its grows, but the transformation to a butterfly requires a metamorphosis within a cocoon.
> [@](#):
>
> [cite](http://www.amnh.org/exhibitions/butterflies/metamorphosis.html) The butterfly begins life as an egg, emerges as a caterpillar, and then undergoes a complete change in body form during development – a dramatic metamorphosis.
>
> After hatching from the egg, the young caterpillar spends most of its time eating leaves and gaining weight. The caterpillar undergoes several molts of its skin until it becomes full grown and has accumulated enough body mass to carry it through the entire life cycle, including the adult phase.
>
> The caterpillar then enters the pupal stage, when it neither feeds nor moves. From the outside, it appears as though the pupa, also known as the chrysalis, is resting. In reality, though, the larval tissues completely break down and reorganize within the pupal skin. What emerges from the chrysalis is a fully formed adult – a butterfly.
(3) _First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is._
While this phenomenon may have occurred in specific places over a period of time sufficient for significant geological changes, I can think of no reasonable circumstances that would result in the appearance, disappearance, and reappearance of a mountain during a person’s lifetime.
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### Author:  [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)
#### Post date: [October 19, 2005, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/179 "2005-10-19T15:19:43Z")
> [@Corner Case](#):
>
> I do not believe it is possible to leviate and be _walking with my feet ten feet off of Beale._
_I have often walked down this street before,
But the pavement always stayed beneath my feet before._
Look a little closer, putz. Unless you’ve climbed down past the grating into a storm sewer, the pavement is still beneath your feet. Even if you’re lying on your back, drunk as a skunk. And it doesn’t freakin’ matter who lives on that street, _they’re all the same in that regard_. Got it? Okay, snap out of it, Freddie - she’s just another girl, there’s plenty of others, many of whom have money too.
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### Author:  [@Corner\_Case](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corner_Case)
#### Post date: [October 19, 2005, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scientifically-inaccurate-songs/325882/180 "2005-10-19T16:48:56Z")
_Inch worm, inch worm; Measuring, the marigolds_.
The inchworm is a geometer moth (or Geometridae, a family of the order Lepidoptera). Size varies and cannot be guaranteed to be exactly 25.4 mm. In addition, the cognition required to measure and retain information on the structure of genus Calendula has not been shown. Neither has an explanation been put forth as to what use the geometer would make of this information.
> [@wikipedia](#):
>
> The name Geometer (earth-measurer) refers to the means of locomotion of the larvae or caterpillars. Equipped with claspers at both ends of the body, a caterpillar will clasp with its front legs and draw up the hind end, then clasp with the hind end and reach out for a new front attachment. The impression that it is measuring its journey is inescapable. The caterpillars are accordingly called loopers or inchworms.
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