# Scratching your crotch **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 3, 2016, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003 "2016-07-03T15:39:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2016, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/21 "2016-07-05T22:15:40Z")
> [@Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](#): > > It’s cool as long as you don’t sniff your fingers. But that’s the best part! ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2016, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/22 "2016-07-06T03:11:40Z")
> [@spamforbrains](#): > > I don’t think women get itchy there as a general rule unless there is a health issue. At least, I don’t personally experience that problem. You must never have washed your underwear with the wrong detergent. Sensitive skin really sucks. However, despite reacting to detergent several times over the years I don’t think I was even in kindergarten yet when I got scolded by an aunt for scratching in public. Only took one scolding before I learned to not scratch when there are other people around. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2016, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/23 "2016-07-06T13:29:20Z")
In my experience, I prefer to scratch someone else’s crotch. (with their consent, of course) ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2016, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/24 "2016-07-06T14:32:22Z")
> [@epbrown01](#): > > Wrong. I won’t dispute that balls occasionally itch, but you don’t _have_ to scratch. “Didn’t Scratch Balls” has never been cited as cause of death in a single coroner’s report in all of human history - you can check. > > The discomfort you feel from not doing so will pass. The impression you make doing so in public lingers. ::arms folded across chest:: hmmmmmmm…_really?_ You have never scratched the ole the nutbag in public before? Ever ever?:dubious: > [@epbrown01](#): > > “Didn’t Scratch Balls” has never been cited as cause of death in a single coroner’s report in all of human history - you can check. Obviously there was a Quincy episode you missed. > [@epbrown01](#): > > The discomfort you feel from not doing so will pass. The impression you make doing so in public lingers. Which brings me to another junk-itch-relief scenario: ever scratched and scratched and scratched away at it, and it’s _still_ itchy, however, as soon as you stop, it’s all of a sudden like - voila - no longer itchy? > [@TriPolar](#): > > If it’s really bad I gotta take 'em out to do it right. Then it’s a big pain in the butt because I have to explain to people that they’re not swollen, they’re just naturally that big. :eek: Meaning - you actually unzip, then, in front of (possibly Presbyterian) folk? (as they clutch nervously at their satchels and other personal effects.) As long as you don’t do that around people who might end up, um…arousing you, I spose. ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2016, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/25 "2016-07-06T16:03:55Z")
There are two kinds of people who scratch their crotch. One kind occasionally has a need to, and tries to do it surreptitiously if possible. The other kind looks around to see how many admirers have observed his proud exhibition of whatever manhood or virility he thinks worthy of displaying in that manner. ---
**Author:** ![ripply](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f4b2a3/32.png) [@ripply](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ripply)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2016, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/26 "2016-07-06T16:35:50Z")
My partner is always scratching his bits and his excuse is something about how they ‘move about and get stuck in places’?? Apparently he’s just rearranging things down there and if he didn’t do it, he’d be very uncomfortable and/or painful. Since I don’t have those parts, I can’t really judge, so I’ve just accepted it. I’m beginning to think he’s talking nonsense and just likes doing it. No one else has given that as their reason here. Myself, I’ve never had any interest in scratching down there. I thought it was just a man’s thing. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2016, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/27 "2016-07-06T20:45:12Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > If it’s really bad I gotta take 'em out to do it right. Then it’s a big pain in the butt because I have to explain to people that they’re not swollen, they’re just naturally that big. > [@Eddie The Horrible](#): > > :eek: Meaning - you actually unzip, then, in front of (possibly Presbyterian) folk? (as they clutch nervously at their satchels and other personal effects.) Alas, 'tis true. I saw **TriPolar** at the ocean once. I thought for a minute he was playing with a pair of fuzzy beach balls. The worst part was when he was finished. One could literally hear the fabric of his Speedo screaming as it was stretched to it’s limits. I don’t think he’s allowed back in Hawaii. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2016, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/28 "2016-07-06T21:08:32Z")
> [@ripply](#): > > My partner is always scratching his bits and his excuse is something about how they ‘move about and get stuck in places’?? Apparently he’s just rearranging things down there and if he didn’t do it, he’d be very uncomfortable and/or painful. Since I don’t have those parts, I can’t really judge, so I’ve just accepted it. I’m beginning to think he’s talking nonsense and just likes doing it. No one else has given that as their reason here. > > Myself, I’ve never had any interest in scratching down there. I thought it was just a man’s thing. TMI! No, it’s true. I Don’t remember it being such a problem when I was younger when my ball sack stayed closer to home. But these days, they tend to roam around all over the place. And yes, at times, it can be very uncomfortable. Also, my balls are freakishly huge. average size penis, but freakishly huge balls, which I imagine, makes my problem worse than your average male. Perhaps, that’s your guy’s problem too. And that’s also why, you probably haven’t heard that excuse before. ETA: I felt compelled to respond to this post as I’ve had this same discussion with my GF. Hope you’re not her!! ---
**Author:** ![OffByOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/45deac/32.png) [@OffByOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OffByOne)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2016, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/29 "2016-07-08T19:09:00Z")
> [@Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](#): > > It’s cool as long as you don’t sniff your fingers. If I can’t sniff my fingers, what’s the point!? ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2016, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/30 "2016-07-08T22:58:03Z")
> [@ripply](#): > > My partner is always scratching his bits and his excuse is something about how they ‘move about and get stuck in places’?? Apparently he’s just rearranging things down there and if he didn’t do it, he’d be very uncomfortable and/or painful. Since I don’t have those parts, I can’t really judge, so I’ve just accepted it. I’m beginning to think he’s talking nonsense and just likes doing it. No one else has given that as their reason here. > > Myself, I’ve never had any interest in scratching down there. I thought it was just a man’s thing. He’s telling the truth. Not only do guys have parts that are always moving around, they’re also always changing size. (not just erections either; the scrotum tightens up in cold and relaxes in warmer temperatures). There are things he might consider, like different underwear styles, but it’s a problem you’re not going to solve without the occasional readjustment. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2016, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/31 "2016-07-09T01:33:55Z")
But don’t worry, dudes - if there’s a bustle in your hedgegrove, don’t be alarmed now. ---
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2016, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/32 "2016-07-10T10:16:25Z")
> [@Eddie The Horrible](#): > > ::arms folded across chest:: > > hmmmmmmm…_really?_ You have never scratched the ole the nutbag in public before? Ever ever?:dubious: What, exactly, do you think would happen that would make this impossible to believe? Have you ever tried simply not doing it? It’s a temporary sensation - ignore it and it will pass. ---
**Author:** ![Beelzebubba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Beelzebubba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beelzebubba)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2016, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/33 "2016-07-10T22:44:25Z")
I try to find a restroom or at least somewhere out of sight to take care of these sorts of things. If I wasn’t so discrete, it would be my luck that someone would see it and I’d end up as a registered sex offender! Just for readjusting the boys… ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2016, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/34 "2016-07-11T02:59:42Z")
> [@epbrown01](#): > > What, exactly, do you think would happen that would make this impossible to believe? An insanity-inducing urge to scratch (an especially prolonged) itch is what would happen that would make that impossible to believe.😛 ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2016, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/35 "2016-07-11T03:50:03Z")
Reading this thread is making my balls itchy. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2016, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/36 "2016-07-11T07:59:00Z")
I don’t have time to waste scratching my crotch. I employ Bambi and Destiny for that job. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2016, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/37 "2016-07-12T18:46:16Z")
My willy needed adjusting. It was all out of whack after chasing down FOC. ---
**Author:** ![Jennshark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Jennshark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennshark)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2016, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/38 "2016-07-12T19:13:48Z")
> [@spamforbrains](#): > > I don’t think women get itchy there as a general rule unless there is a health issue. At least, I don’t personally experience that problem. However, once we had a house full of churchy relatives of an in-law and my left nipple started itching so badly that I pretended to be looking in the fridge for something so I could scratch it behind the door. Don’t EVER, if you’re prone to folluculitis/in-grown hairs, go all girl Brazil down there. Indescribably itchy as it sprouts back :eek: ---
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2016, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/39 "2016-07-13T11:09:18Z")
> [@AncientHumanoid](#): > > My willy needed adjusting. It was all out of whack after chasing down FOC. _Man_, that was a bad run of films for Martin (he had a seven film contract to one studio, iirc). The only thing I took away from **Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid** was that Rachel Ward was hot. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2016, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003/40 "2016-07-13T14:36:56Z")
> [@AncientHumanoid](#): > > My willy needed adjusting. It was all out of whack after chasing down FOC. I googled FOC and got things like Father of the Chapel, and then Steve Martin entered the picture, so now I’m really all out of whack. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/scratching-your-crotch/759003.md?page=3)