# Screw Greg Abbott {Texas Governor} **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 2, 2021, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141 "2021-03-02T21:00:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 20
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2021, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/382 "2021-12-15T23:39:08Z")
> [@DavidNRockies](#): > > How do you think he’d hold up on cross ? I admit, I didn’t see that coming! Should have… ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2021, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/383 "2021-12-16T03:07:14Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > I thought he was just an asinine troll against the Democrats, but he’s a bipartisan troll. How the fuck did he get elected?! [![](https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-2c5eQOk6_Nw/V06Qf56gimI/AAAAAAAAEiA/tqj0skOAUlERB_EGkJFBwJseUGy3_KxHQCLcB/s1600/NICE.jpg) ](https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-2c5eQOk6_Nw/V06Qf56gimI/AAAAAAAAEiA/tqj0skOAUlERB_EGkJFBwJseUGy3_KxHQCLcB/s1600/NICE.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2021, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/384 "2021-12-16T03:12:37Z")
How the fuck did trump get elected? ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2021, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/385 "2021-12-16T03:16:07Z")
Courtesy of Mr. D. Vermin: [![](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRp3jDXZMzfVjpHSUWdkfs3s5qVyk7eJ71KuA&usqp=CAU) ](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRp3jDXZMzfVjpHSUWdkfs3s5qVyk7eJ71KuA&usqp=CAU) ---
**Author:** ![flurb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@flurb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flurb)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2021, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/386 "2021-12-16T03:54:06Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > How the fuck did he get elected?! That’s a good question. In 2014, when Rick Perry decided he was bored with constantly getting elected Governor, Abbott managed to clear the Republican field. I myself am not quite sure how he managed that – there hadn’t been an open race for the Governor’s office since 1994, the state was packed with ambitious Republicans, and Abbott himself didn’t really have much name recognition or political reputation despite being the AG. I think mostly it was a transitional time in the party - Ted Cruz had just been elected the cycle before, and every other statewide Republican officeholder would end up being replaced by a more conservative successor within the next couple of years. By this point the Republican nomination effectively was the election for Governor in Texas, but Democrats made it easier by nominating Wendy Davis. As for why he keeps getting reelected, he’s a weed in the wind of conservative politics. Conservatives don’t really like or trust him, but they know he’ll bend to whatever they want if they make enough noise. Better him than a more principled, strong-willed conservative who might prove stubborn over some future disagreement. In the absence of a Democratic opposition, that’s all that matters. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2021, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/387 "2021-12-16T14:26:58Z")
IIRC, Abbott was kind of a shoo-in, in Perry’s wake. At voting time, the Republican primary consisted of Abbott, a hispanic woman, a loon secessionist, and a young black woman. He won with 91% of the primary votes. Most of the big guns at the time didn’t run (Pauken withdrew and Dewhurst did not run). In the general election, it was him vs. Wendy Davis, whose primary claim to fame at that point was a filibuster vs. an abortion restriction law in 2013. Abbott won 59% to 38% in the general election. So not as screwed up as how Ted Cruz got elected - he actaully lost the primary, but by a close enough margin to force a runoff, and then he won the runoff by basically capturing all the non-runoff candidates’ voters. (Dewhurst got roughly 44% of voters in both the primary and the runoff, while Cruz got 34% and then 56% respectively.) The big problem is that sometime in the late 90s/early 2000s, the Republicans managed to get a stranglehold on the political process, and basically whoever wins the runoff has gone on to win the election. It’s such a problem that it’s not at all uncommon for Democrats and others who aren’t big party functionaries to go vote in the Republican primaries to either try and get the lesser of the evils, or to try and have a less strong candidate versus a strong Democrat. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/388 "2021-12-23T15:28:46Z")
> **[Gov. Greg Abbott has touted the state’s efforts to build a border wall, but...](https://www.texastribune.org/2021/12/21/texas-border-wall-abbott-secrecy/)** > > Abbott unveiled the first 900 feet of border barrier Saturday. But the state has been mum on where it plans to build additional barriers and how many miles it can afford. > On Saturday, Gov. [Greg Abbott](https://www.texastribune.org/directory/greg-abbott/) unveiled **nearly 900 feet** of newly constructed border barrier on state-owned land near the Rio Grande in Starr County, six months after he promised to finish what President Donald Trump started. > > It was the first section of what’s expected to be a nearly 2-mile stretch of wall, and it followed a series of smaller-scale state attempts to block immigrants with [chain-link fences](https://www.texastribune.org/2021/08/13/texas-border-wall-greg-abbott/), a row of [shipping containers](https://www.texastribune.org/2021/11/18/texas-border-shipping-containers-eagle-pass/) and even a [boat blockade](https://www.borderreport.com/hot-topics/border-crime/texas-lines-up-boats-to-stem-flow-of-undocumented-immigrants-over-rio-grande/) on the river. > > But after the **Trump administration managed to build just 21 miles of new border barrier on the 1,254-mile Texas-Mexico border over four years** (and also replaced 34 miles of older barrier), the state hasn’t publicly disclosed some basic information about Abbott’s wall-building plans. > > Texas has set aside $1.05 billion for border barriers but hasn’t revealed where it plans to build them, how much each mile will cost or how it’s addressing the challenge of acquiring enough private land to fulfill Abbott’s promise. > … My bold. REAL good use of funds, Greg! 'Cause Texas doesn’t have any other problems that could be helped by throwing some a billion dollars at them, amirite? Where’s the emoji that shows the Guv playing with himself? On second thought… _never mind_… ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/389 "2021-12-23T17:04:15Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > Where’s the emoji that shows the Guv playing with himself? 🍄 👋 ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/390 "2021-12-23T17:22:48Z")
😲 Good one! ---
**Author:** ![flurb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@flurb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flurb)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/391 "2021-12-23T18:34:41Z")
Abbott can’t say anything about where the wall will be built because he’d have to use eminent domain to seize private property to build it. He says that he’s in “talks” with landowners to donate their land for the wall, but if they weren’t willing to sell or donate their land to Trump for his wall why would they do so for Abbott? ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/392 "2021-12-23T18:58:38Z")
That is specific to Trump. For most males it is: 👋🍆 ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/393 "2021-12-23T19:11:37Z")
General purpose. 👖 🐍 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/394 "2021-12-23T19:16:02Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > 🍄 👋 You misspelled 🦼🍄 👋 (Which also works for Madison Cawthorn) ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/395 "2021-12-23T19:52:21Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > You misspelled 🦼🍄 👋 > > (Which also works for Madison Cawthorn) 'Specially inasmuch as he going to be going solo now. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/396 "2021-12-23T23:22:06Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > That is specific to Trump. This is what I’d have done for Donny: 🐛 👋 ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/397 "2021-12-23T23:54:19Z")
There are some creative people here. I’m glad you’re using your powers for good and not for evil. ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2021, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/398 "2021-12-24T01:54:16Z")
⚱ 🐛 🤏 (The urn is the “earthen vessel” he’s missing). ---
**Author:** ![flurb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@flurb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flurb)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2021, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/399 "2021-12-24T16:57:44Z")
Reading between the lines, Abbott forced the Board of Pardons and Paroles to reverse its unanimous recommendation that he posthumously pardon Geoge Floyd for a misdemeanor drug conviction in 2004. Allegedly the reversal is due to “procedural errors” in the original recommendation, but I don’t believe that for a second. Abbott just didn’t want to be in the position of having to make a decision one way or the other, so he pushed his lackeys to make it go away. He’s such a weasel. > **[Texas board rescinds recommendation for posthumous pardon of George Floyd](https://www.texastribune.org/2021/12/23/george-floyd-texas-pardon/)** > > The Texas Board of Pardons and Paroles cited a procedural error for the decision but seemed to leave open the possibility that it would reconsider the issue in the near future. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2021, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/400 "2021-12-26T15:41:55Z")
If history is any guide, all Abbott really **needs is** 900 feet of wall at/near the border and an outsized “MISSION ACCOMPLISHED” banner hanging on it. And a handful of press with cameras. It worked for Shrub … ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2021, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141/401 "2021-12-26T18:47:01Z")
I suggested a mile-long potemkin wall for Trump and quietly syphon the rest of the money off for something important years ago but with a Republican majority in both houses it was just a fantasy, [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141.md?page=19) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-greg-abbott-texas-governor/934141.md?page=21)