# Screw the Bieber and Go to Jail. Priceless **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 3, 2011, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716 "2011-11-03T05:06:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2011, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/121 "2011-11-07T16:26:04Z")
Maury Povich should offer Beiber $1 million to come on his show to have the paternity test results revealed. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2011, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/122 "2011-11-07T16:48:17Z")
I heard from someone who heard from someone who heard that his Christmas DVD has Bieber dressed as Santa surrounded by cute little babies dressed as Santa’s elves. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2011, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/123 "2011-11-07T21:00:48Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > It more complex than that. Mariah Yater hired a look-alike to go fuck Justin Bieber, but her look-alike was confused by _his_ look-alike. She ended up buying one of those babies stolen by the Catholic Church, so the baby isn’t related by blood to either of them. \ mmmmm… needs more Illuminati. ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2011, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/124 "2011-11-07T21:04:54Z")
She’s still not backing down. She’s sticking with her story that she has absolute proof. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2011, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/125 "2011-11-07T21:06:05Z")
> [@Death\_of\_Rats](#): > > \ > > mmmmm… needs more Illuminati. You can never really go wrong with throwing in a healthy chunk of Illuminati. ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2011, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/126 "2011-11-07T21:18:06Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > You can never really go wrong with throwing in a healthy chunk of Illuminati. On that page that claims it was a rape the second photo of him (holding his hand in front of his eyes) is labeled: > [@](#): > > Justin Bieber at Staples Center Concert Oct. 25, 2010 Gesturing Alleged Representation of Illuminati New World Order Eye of Horus :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2011, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/127 "2011-11-07T21:27:21Z")
Illuminati is truly the Bacon salt of CTs. > [@Infovore](#): > > I feel sorry for the poor kid in a few years. Can you imagine what kind of schoolyard hell a boy named “Tristyn” is going to have to endure? > > Seriously, “Tristyn”? :rolleyes: The only way this could be worse is if he actually is Tristyn Bieber. At that point he is morally obligated to beat himself up on the playground and to swishy himself at least once a day. on the plus side he can still eat after he takes his own lunch money. ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2011, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/128 "2011-11-07T21:32:18Z")
> [@Death\_of\_Rats](#): > > Illuminati is truly the Bacon salt of CTs. > > The only way this could be worse is if he actually is Tristyn Bieber. At that point he is morally obligated to beat himself up on the playground and to swishy himself at least once a day. on the plus side he can still eat after he takes his own lunch money. Hahahahaha “Stop Bieberin’ yourself. Stop Bieberin’ yourself.” ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2011, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/129 "2011-11-11T18:51:09Z")
> [@Infovore](#): > > I feel sorry for the poor kid in a few years. Can you imagine what kind of schoolyard hell a boy named “Tristyn” is going to have to endure? > > Seriously, “Tristyn”? :rolleyes: Tristan (the usual spelling) has been a top 100 boy’s name in America since 2006. I doubt anyone in his class will think it’s weirder than names with a similar current popularity like Hayden, or Cody. ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/130 "2011-11-12T00:30:50Z")
> [@Omar\_Little](#): > > Maury Povich should offer Beiber $1 million to come on his show to have the paternity test results revealed. He’s trying to! [http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2011/11/11/maury-would-like-to-help-bieber-out-with-his-paternity-problem/](http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2011/11/11/maury-would-like-to-help-bieber-out-with-his-paternity-problem/) ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/131 "2011-11-12T01:07:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Screw the Bieber and Go to Jail. Priceless care about the Bieber when you’re older than 11. Pathetic. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/132 "2011-11-12T02:14:33Z")
> [@rhubarbarin](#): > > Tristan (the usual spelling) has been a top 100 boy’s name in America since 2006. I doubt anyone in his class will think it’s weirder than names with a similar current popularity like Hayden, or Cody. I didn’t say “Tristan” (which is a perfectly acceptable name). “Tristyn,” on the other hand, is horrible. It might be cute for a girl, but not for a boy who doesn’t want to get teased by classmates. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/133 "2011-11-12T03:31:50Z")
The name Trystyn will serve as a reminder that he is allegedly the result of a tryst. ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/134 "2011-11-12T07:21:05Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > The name Trystyn will serve as a reminder that he is allegedly the result of a tryst. I’ve seen several articles that spelled it that way. 😏: ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/135 "2011-11-12T12:48:41Z")
> [@jz78817](#): > > care about the Bieber when you’re older than 11. Pathetic. What does that make people who care about those “pathetic” people’s opinions? ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/136 "2011-11-12T13:39:00Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > What does that make people who care about those “pathetic” people’s opinions? Thank you. Unhelpful post is unhelpful. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/137 "2011-11-12T16:42:20Z")
> [@Infovore](#): > > I didn’t say “Tristan” (which is a perfectly acceptable name). “Tristyn,” on the other hand, is horrible. It might be cute for a girl, but not for a boy who doesn’t want to get teased by classmates. I’m telling you, it’s perfectly normal these days to have a faddishly misspelled name. No one is going to make fun of a boy for having a Y instead of an A. I know a 10-year-old boy named (I’m serious!) Kailyb (his mom calls him Kai), it has not interfered with his social status one whit. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/138 "2011-11-12T17:06:27Z")
Jeez, how many of these kids are ever going to learn to spell correctly anyway? ---
**Author:** ![Greg\_Charles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/839c29/32.png) [@Greg\_Charles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greg_Charles)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/139 "2011-11-12T17:09:16Z")
Tryst? Y/N It’s the paternity test unpunctuated. ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2011, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716/140 "2011-11-12T19:48:15Z")
> [@Greg\_Charles](#): > > Tryst? Y/N LOL Has anyone seen the interview of her breaking down in sobs when showed the clip of Justin claiming he’s never even met her? Like she hadn’t seen that already! What a frikkin’ phoney! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/screw-the-bieber-and-go-to-jail-priceless/601716.md?page=8)