# SDMB book contest! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 30, 2004, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408 "2004-03-30T21:57:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Antnee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/919ad9/32.png) [@Antnee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antnee)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/241 "2004-04-02T06:01:05Z")
Minnow = Convicted Clueless Poster (CCP? …Hmm) Parolee = obvious… idinit? Likely Candidate = Newbie Guppy = been around a short while (hey, I can’t even qualify as a Guppy!) Worm = (Better than LC, but not very appealing, is it?) Little Fish = gett’n smarter all the time Big Fish = always baiting somebody bigger than them Come to think of it…I’m not sure I undrstand the Contest all that well. I hope I did good! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![DaveW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9d8465/32.png) [@DaveW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaveW)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/242 "2004-04-02T06:59:28Z")
Pre-4/22 Members: **Nyaah-Nyaah** Post-4/22 Members: **I Paid How Much?** Guests: **Thinking About It** As I’ve said elsewhere, I think any elitism which is found will be self-imposed by those who wish to be seen as “lower-class victims.” Thus, my tongue-in-cheek suggestions to make the distinctions _absurdly_ extreme. To continue the “theme”: Mods: **Pbbbbbbbbbbbt!** Admins: **Above the Bickering** Oh, and… Banned people: **Didn’t Bring Pie** ---
**Author:** ![shijinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@shijinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shijinn)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/243 "2004-04-02T07:36:35Z")
**SDMB** cecil - **perfect master** admins - **adminstrator** mods - **moderator** sdsab - **advisor** all others - **doper** fewer than 1 post per day - **lurker** guests - **visitor** banned - **whatever** _or_ **BDSM** cecil - **perfect master** admins - **master** mods - **mistress** sdsab - **sub** all others - **slave** fewer than 1 post per day - **voyeur** guests - **virgin** banned - **exile** ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/244 "2004-04-02T08:00:10Z")
**Charter Member** Bright. Annointed one. **Member** Thrall. Teemingite. Fodder. **Ranchoth** Coward, Bully, Cad, and Thief. Mad Goat of the Fens. Designated Ghoul. ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 8:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/245 "2004-04-02T08:41:40Z")
I’ll second shijinn’s post, and add for charter members only; Dope Head Doper (not sure who to give credit to, it’s late, and I should be sleeping) All the variations on Cecilian Rank and File (banned could be just plain rank) (paying) Customer Freeloader (for guest, again, credit to whoever came up with it first) Member of the Flock Follower Devotee (banned could be Schmuck, Putz, undesireable, miscreant, malcontent etc.) ---
**Author:** ![Noone\_Special](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/noone_special/32/2863_2.png) [@Noone\_Special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noone_Special)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/246 "2004-04-02T14:14:19Z")
Since the complaint seems to be that “charter member” is too snooty, let’s go the other way, and instead of the still-somewhat-formal “member” let us each and all be called **Dick** [sup]\*[/sup] Dani [sup]\*[/sup]Those opposed to this title may choose **Peter** instead Oh, and I stilll don’t know what to do about the ladies! ---
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/247 "2004-04-02T14:32:26Z")
> [@Padeye](#): > > Charter Member - **Plank Owner** : an old navy term for the original crew on a ship who are given deck planks when the ship is decomissioned. May that day never come for SDMB. This is great. It’s got my vote even though my vote doesn’t matter. ---
**Author:** ![Algernon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a183cd/32.png) [@Algernon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algernon)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/248 "2004-04-02T14:35:25Z")
First I want to reiterate what I’ve said before, that I dislike the idea of having an exclusive group (Charter Members) whose membership is forever closed. Why create a culture that labels some people as second class citizens? I know it doesn’t seem like a big deal right now, but think of where we’d be in a couple years when we’d have some idiot like **Algernon** having a title of Charter Member, and new people come along who are knowledgeable and erudite and well respected, yet have to forever live with “lower” titles. Early in this thread **DDG** articulated it better than I can, so I’ll just say “me too”. The only situation where I could be content with the Charter Member title, is if it were granted to 1999 joiners, as **DaveRaver** suggested. In addition, I’d prefer to avoid labels based on post count. I know it’s common practice on most message boards, but I’d be happier without it. My suggestions are similar to **shijinn’s** (and other’s). I have simple taste. Cecil - Perfect Master Ed - Master Jerry - Tech God Admins -Adminstrator Mods - Moderator SDSAB - Advisor all others - Doper guests - Guest I disagree with the suggestion of “fewer than 1 post per day - lurker.” Lurking, though the word is pretty accurate, has too sinister of a connotation for my taste. I like **Alan Smithee’s** suggestion of using “Fighting ignorance since:” rather than join date. I like **LolaBaby’s** suggestion of Banned Dopers being labeled as “Does Not Play Well With Others.” Though if we use the term Member for regular Dopers, then **Sturmhauke’s** suggestion to use “Dismembered” as the label for banned Members is quite clever. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/249 "2004-04-02T14:55:56Z")
Mods: Smiter Banned: Smoten ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/250 "2004-04-02T17:03:47Z")
First: I like the idea of letting everyone provide their own titles. Second: I don’t think much of the Charter Member/Member distinction. The fact that some of us got here first is no measure of our contribution–even a post count distinction (which I also don’t care for) would be better. Third: I like the idea of distinguishing posters by the fora they frequent most. This would probably require letting people choose their titles from a list, as the overhead of tracking which forum everyone has the most posts in would send the hamsters into cardiac arrest. Some possible forum-based titles: GQ: Inquiring Mind Querent Dumb Looks Still Free Mod–Interlocutor CS: Socialite Fanboy/Fangirl Would-be Critic Espresso Croissant Mod–Social Coordinator IMHO: Opinionated! Humble? Mod–Nothing To Be Humble About MPSIMS: Imp TMI Provider Chatterbox Mod–Kindergarten Cop Pit: Pitizen Demon Briquette Mod–Spatula of Removal, Made of Asbestos, Retard Flamant ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/251 "2004-04-02T17:12:40Z")
BANNED: **Total Dipstick** Members/Charter Members: Should be allowed to pick their own! Guests: **Guest** Cecil: I like **The Master Speaks. Hush.** Another vote for **"Fighting Ignorance Since:"** ---
**Author:** ![sperfur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9adbd/32.png) [@sperfur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sperfur)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/252 "2004-04-02T20:15:01Z")
These are my favorites: > [@Nekosoft](#): > > **MirrorImageegamIrorriM** > egamIrorriMMirrorImage > [@FisherQueen](#): > > **Esprix** > I’m gay! Ask me how! ---
**Author:** ![Jayn\_Newell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jayn\_Newell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayn_Newell)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/253 "2004-04-02T20:18:51Z")
If we want a HHGTTG theme, here’s a couple more: Cecil: Knows the question to 42 Banned: Marvin ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/254 "2004-04-02T20:39:07Z")
I didn’t realize SDSAB was a possible category. So they should be referred to as **Scientist,** and persons between 7501 and 10000 posts can become **Post-Graduates.** > [@RickJay](#): > > I propose a heirarchy of titles based on a combination of post count and position, with an educational theme. > > Regular Posters > > Not registered: **Unwashed Mass** > \<100 posts: **Kindergartener** > 101-250 posts: **Pupil** > 251-500 posts: **Student** > 501-1000 posts: **Frosh** > 1001-2000 posts: **Senior** > 2001-3500 posts: **Scholar** > 3501-5000 posts: **Candidate** > 5001-7500 posts: **Graduate** > 7501-10000 posts: **Scientist** > 10001-20000 posts: **Doctor of Letters** > 20001 posts or more, if it ever happens: **Laureate** > > Staff > > Moderators: **Principal** > Ed Zotti: **Genius** > Cecil Himself: **The Master** - of course! > > Others > > Banned: **Reprobate** > Suspended: **Purgatist** ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/255 "2004-04-02T20:56:06Z")
> [@Algernon](#): > > Though if we use the term Member for regular Dopers, then **Sturmhauke’s** suggestion to use “Dismembered” as the label for banned Members is quite clever. Well, I’m flattered, but you have to say it right. If you just toss “Dismembered” out there by itself, it lacks a certain… violent aspect. You have to do it like this: \*_DISMEMBERED! | : \ : :|: : ! :: \_\__ \_=- \* \_- ^ \*\* ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMule](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc348/32.png) [@MonkeyMule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMule)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/256 "2004-04-02T21:37:05Z")
Wow. I never thought this little contest would get this much reponse. 😃 I’m glad you guys are having fun, but down to buissnes. I just finished packing up the boxes, and i have to say You can really fit alot of books in those suckers. I say the Grand prize winner is going to walk away with 40 books or so, and snd place isn’t that far behind. ANywho, **TubaDiva** told me that this thread is being locked down tomorrow morning, so I say get off your asses and get yoru ideas in. Time’s a wasting. Also, while ed said we aren’t collecting money Any gold statues you’d like to erect in our likenesses would go along way 😉 Enjoy the fun and I’m glad I could bring such joy to my future minions ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMule](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc348/32.png) [@MonkeyMule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMule)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/257 "2004-04-02T21:39:20Z")
> [@MonkeyMule](#): > > Wow. I never thought this little contest would get this much reponse. 😃 I’m glad you guys are having fun, but down to buissnes. I just finished packing up the boxes, and i have to say You can really fit alot of books in those suckers. I say the Grand prize winner is going to walk away with 40 books or so, and snd place isn’t that far behind. ANywho, **TubaDiva** told me that this thread is being locked down tomorrow morning, so I say get off your asses and get yoru ideas in. Time’s a wasting. Also, while ed said we aren’t collecting money Any gold statues you’d like to erect in our likenesses would go along way 😉 > > Enjoy the fun and I’m glad I could bring such joy to my future minions Also, I wanted to say that sadly, once of the Beyond Infinity books snagged for some office function. I’ve replaced it with an Advance Reading copy. Hopefully i’ll be able to get a new full copy by the time these get mailed. To whom ever wins this prize, my apologies in advance ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/258 "2004-04-02T23:38:00Z")
Here’s a themed set of titles… Ed Zotti: **Judge** Moderators **Jury** Lynn Bodoni **Executioner** Paying Members **Still Breathing** Guests **On Borrowed Time** Banned **Pushing Up The Daisies** ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2004, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/259 "2004-04-02T23:58:38Z")
Oh, and for Monstre **The Beast, Devourer of Words** ---
**Author:** ![ZebraShaSha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/eada6e/32.png) [@ZebraShaSha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZebraShaSha)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2004, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408/260 "2004-04-03T00:00:50Z")
Lyn Bodoni: **Why else would trolls live under a bridge?** [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-book-contest/237408.md?page=14)