# SDMB is so hostile these days (not just the pit) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 18, 2004, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005 "2004-03-18T08:08:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/41 "2004-03-18T15:05:15Z")
Is there a hostile way I can tell **Lib** I’m sending happy vibes his way? ---
**Author:** ![Genghis\_Bob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/45deac/32.png) [@Genghis\_Bob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Genghis_Bob)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/42 "2004-03-18T15:15:53Z")
> [@iampunha](#): > > . . . where I might previously have invoked the Beauteous and Worthy “goat-felching ass-licking bastard son of a syphillitic Babylonian sewer rat”. . . Babylonian sewer rat . . . mmmm . . . spicey. . . ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/43 "2004-03-18T15:19:26Z")
> [@Arcite](#): > > But do you (or Coldfire, who posted a similar “rebuttal”) go around flaming people with ridiculously over-the-top profanity? Not that I can recall. Well, I do. I am 5’10", 195, weightlifter, black belt, contact lenses, distinguished graying dark hair. And my daughter picked out my shirt, so it matches. But this is the Pit, and over-the-top abuse is a tradition, and often highly entertaining. And GD wouldn’t be any fun if people weren’t arguing as hard as they can, and to win. That’s the fun of it. If everybody agreed to disagree, nobody learns anything. Consider the ignore list, if you can’t just learn to skip over some posts. Regards, Shodan PS - I have a note on my PC to pray for you, **Libertarian**. May God comfort you in what you are going thru now. ---
**Author:** ![Nametag](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nametag/32/406_2.png) [@Nametag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nametag)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/44 "2004-03-18T15:20:45Z")
> [@World Eater](#): > > Is there a hostile way I can tell Lib I’m sending happy vibes his way? Of course! “Listen, you goat-felching ass-licking bastard son of a syphillitic Babylonian sewer rat, I’m sending happy vibes your way. Deal with it.” 😉 Granted, it’s a little schizoid, but whaddya want for free? ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/45 "2004-03-18T15:25:39Z")
> [@World Eater](#): > > Is there a hostile way I can tell **Lib** I’m sending happy vibes his way? “Yo, I’m sending good thoughts your way, motherfucker!”–does that help? And, yeah, two of the most notorious bigots on the board think that they draw negative comments because their critics are just unhappy people. If that’s what they need to think to get through the day, more power to them. AS for **Skutir’s** comments, this board soes not intend to be cliquish, but there are definitely different levels of interaction here. Some folks spend time on IRC, they Live Journal, and they call and e-mail each other, so, yes, some folks have more intimate connections with each other that may seem to be exclusive to others. I pretty much limit my participation to the board and the occasional Dopefest, but I don’t feel bad about missing in-jokes or not being in any of the so-called cliques. As for the pack mentality, hey, welcome to the Internet and human nature. The Dope is acutally a pretty fair-minded place–if you want to see examples of groupthink and packs of wild posters being vicious to one another, check out the fundy boards like Rapture Ready or Baptistboard. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/46 "2004-03-18T15:27:04Z")
> [@Nametag](#): > > Of course! > > “Listen, you goat-felching ass-licking bastard son of a syphillitic Babylonian sewer rat, I’m sending happy vibes your way. Deal with it.” 😉 > > Granted, it’s a little schizoid, but whaddya want for free? Sounds good to me. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/47 "2004-03-18T15:27:49Z")
I don’t pray, **Lib** , but I am having good thoughts for you. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/48 "2004-03-18T15:31:11Z")
Just don’t go mass-inviting them to GD to state their case(s). We’ve got enough bullshit and bigotry in GD masquerading as previously unknown race theory (complete with -oid endings and capital letters for each race) without having to deal with people who sincerely believe we’re in a theocracy. Oh. Forgot to mention my black belt, too. I don’t lift much (if, really, ever), but I’m somehow not so much the weakling. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/49 "2004-03-18T16:06:54Z")
I’m sorry to the OP that I hijacked his thread, but I really do appreciate the good wishes and prayers from everyone. I’ll be leaving in about an hour to go to the neurologist. I’m sure everything will be fine. It’s only atoms. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/50 "2004-03-18T16:09:56Z")
> [@Arcite](#): > > I think you’re on to something. Often, while reading the latest flame war, I’ve suspected that the people (specifically men) whose posts are littered with things like “suck the maggot-infested dickcheese off a dead goat’s necrotized cock, you asshatted fucktard” are in real life nerdy accountants who are 5’3" tall, wear Coke-bottle glasses, have male pattern baldness, and would shuffle away wringing their hands and whimpering if you told them you didn’t like their shirt; and they’re venting their real-life frustrations on a internet message board because that’s the only place they feel they can do it. Why would you tell someone you don’t like his shirt? That’s pretty rude. ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/51 "2004-03-18T16:29:25Z")
> [@Otto](#): > > Why would you tell someone you don’t like his shirt? That’s pretty rude. You call yourself a gay man and you don’t comment on other people’s tacky fashion choices? Mind you, to their face is a bit much, but _still_ . . . **Lib** , you’re going to be fine. Hopefully, you don’t have MS, but if you do, it’s manageable. One of my sisters has it (the evil, bitchy one) and she still mamages to raise a family and keep house. I’m holding out positive thoughts for you. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/52 "2004-03-18T16:37:30Z")
> [@ThatGuy](#): > > I just wonder if anyone will agree there are some serious egos here 'Tain’t the egos that worry me. It’s the ids. Several of the posters in the Trek threads have the most, elaborate, and bizarre Yoshi fantasies. A few Dopers secretly yearn to be the filling in a Hobbit sandwich. But, it all pales in comparison to lecherous hungers of **TroyMcLuresf**. I’d heard rumors of course. But I never thought people actually did that with fish. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/53 "2004-03-18T16:40:41Z")
> [@skutir](#): > > I think this reflects the culture of the board pretty well… I wouldn’t call it hostile, but it is somewhat exclusive, with lots of inside jokes amongst old timers, cryptic messages, threads that degenerate into ritualistic exchanges, etc., and a general alpha-dog and/or pack mentality where posters either try to eviscerate their opponent or several posters “pile on” one unfortunate fuck (who may or may not deserve it). This board prides itself on being smarter/more intellectually rigorous, but to some extent that is undermined by the alpha dog/pack mentality… I don’t know I’ve seen a friendly exchange of ideas or mutual respect among parties with different opinions… it’s hardly a lyceum, or even a structured debate, and the tone is often belligerent and arrogant. I would think that a public forum could have intellectual rigor and a higher minded debate. Not that I have exemplified this, but I’m just saying generally that I know where the OP is coming from, even though I wouldn’t use the word “hostile.” > > I’m fairly new here, and I am sure every old timer will now say that I’ve got it all wrong, but I assure you that this is not the most hospitable or inviting board, as is evidenced by ETF’s name calling and tough-guy posturing above. I have friendly exchanges of ideas with people with different opinions quite often here. Attack the argument, not the poster is the best rule of conduct for any forum here. I will disagree with the OP, too, because the level of hostility you experience here is most likely in proportion to what you’re doing yourself. I have very rarely had hostility directed at me, because I have rarely directed hostility at others. When people are doing their pile-on thing, I don’t participate, and try to re-direct it if it seems appropriate. Otherwise I just close the thread and don’t go back. This is not the most inviting board, that’s true. It also isn’t a closed community - if you stick around long enough, and don’t post shite every time you post a reply, you’ll be as welcome in the community as anyone. No one’s going to come out and give you a basket of cookies as a welcome gift here, though. And just ignore the ritual exchanges and in-jokes; I do. (And it’s the Canadians, not the Aussies who are the most intelligent posters. Silly sun-soaked wankers. :D) ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/54 "2004-03-18T17:30:49Z")
> [@skutir](#): > > I’m fairly new here, and I am sure every old timer will now say that I’ve got it all wrong, but I assure you that this is not the most hospitable or inviting board, as is evidenced by ETF’s name calling and tough-guy posturing above. Cripes, you’ve been here a year longer than I have, and you feel left out by the inside jokes? If you don’t get something, just ask – there are plenty of Dopers who’ll be happy to inform you, and not with condescension, either. Every so often, someone starts a MPSIMS thread asking “What does \*\*\*\*\* mean?” and helpful Dopers chime in with explanations, links to the threads where it started, useful tangents, and so on. As to my “whiners” comment being “name-calling and tough-guy\* posturing”? Whoo-wee, little child, whatever are you doing in the Pit if you think my feeble contribution is bad? There are masters of invective here who make me look like a kindergartener. **Shodan** , just for one among many, could eviscerate you with wit and style without breaking a sweat. Am I a mean-spirited elitist who disembowels newbies for sport? Ask **Starving Artist** about that. I’d say **gobear** and **featherlou** have nailed it. Except, **featherlou** , that it’s New Englanders who constitute the smartest posters here – the climate weeds out the unfit, you know. \*BTW, I’m a broad, so kindly phrase your epithets accordingly. ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/55 "2004-03-18T17:55:05Z")
New Englanders? I thought it was us mongrel, hybrid immigrant types who don’t know which culture we’re using at the moment who were the best and brightest! 😉 (Note to **EddyTeddyFreddy** : what part of New England? I’ve got friends and family up there and I’ve been known to head that direction once in a while.) Right now, I’m a little more on edge than usual thanks to recent events in Great Debates. I’ve already deleted one very nasty post before hitting Submit this week, and I have a feeling I may be tempted to do so again. There are also people who have a habit of posting vitriol and cruelty who may see more of such things on this board because it’s returned to them, sometimes in spades. It’s a case of reaping what you sow, I’d say. **Libertarian** , you’re in my thoughts and prayers as well, of course. I think you’ve got my phone number; use it if you need to. Have I covered all the major points in this thread? CJ ---
**Author:** ![Chicago\_Faucet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chicago_faucet/32/13910_2.png) [@Chicago\_Faucet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chicago_Faucet)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/56 "2004-03-18T18:21:33Z")
> [@iampunha](#): > > And of course it’s entirely their doing that their lives could be better. The posters who are assholes to you are all unhappy, too, and their quality of life is completely their doing as well. > > Was that all the strawmen, or did I miss one? This right here is a perfect example of the subject of this thread. (BTW, love 'ya Libertarian. I am really interested in your politics. Get better now!) I am assuming that this was not sarcasm on your part. iampunha, you accused SnoopyFan of creating a Strawman, when you yourself created one. SnoopyFan said nothing of what you accused her of saying, or even alluding to. ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/57 "2004-03-18T19:40:56Z")
I find it interesting that in a thread about how hostile everyone is now… there is an outpouring of support for a doper in trouble. Health and longevity to you, **Libertarian**. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/58 "2004-03-18T19:56:36Z")
> [@Siege](#): > > New Englanders? I thought it was us mongrel, hybrid immigrant types who don’t know which culture we’re using at the moment who were the best and brightest! 😉 (Note to **EddyTeddyFreddy** : what part of New England? I’ve got friends and family up there and I’ve been known to head that direction once in a while.) Hey, I’m a mongrel hybrid immigrant\* New Englander (Yankee, French, German) who DOES know what culture she happens to be using at the moment – doesn’t that trump you? I’m resident on the North Shore of Massachusetts, superior\*\* to Boston. > [@](#): > > There are also people who have a habit of posting vitriol and cruelty who may see more of such things on this board because it’s returned to them, sometimes in spades. It’s a case of reaping what you sow, I’d say. I agree. Sometimes folks get blindsided out of the attacker’s malice or personal agenda, or because what they’ve said in all innocence gets taken the wrong way. But my observation is that anyone who consistently draws hostile fire is doing something to invite it. \*Okay, so the Yankee goes back to DAR vintage – it’s still immigrant, if you ask the descendants of Powhaten. And the German part meandered over in the late 19th century, so there. I’m not sure when the French sidled in. 😉 \*\*Geographically, of course – what else did you think I meant? ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/59 "2004-03-18T21:22:18Z")
> [@Arcite](#): > > I think you’re on to something. Often, while reading the latest flame war, I’ve suspected that the people (specifically men) whose posts are littered with things like “suck the maggot-infested dickcheese off a dead goat’s necrotized cock, you asshatted fucktard” are in real life nerdy accountants who are 5’3" tall, wear Coke-bottle glasses, have male pattern baldness, and would shuffle away wringing their hands and whimpering if you told them you didn’t like their shirt; and they’re venting their real-life frustrations on a internet message board because that’s the only place they feel they can do it. Yes, because everyone knows that shortness, nearsightedness, and receding hairlines are the _antithesis_ of confidence and politeness.:rolleyes: I’m guessing you’re a flat-chested, big-hipped, frigid woman who is upset because she dinged her SUV due to lack of driving skill.😃 ---
**Author:** ![dinoboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dinoboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dinoboy)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2004, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005/60 "2004-03-18T21:42:05Z")
This is like a bad 7th Heaven family reunion… :rolleyes: But as to the OP, I have never taken anything said here (all boards) as anything more than sarcastic, or short-term, venting. I’m like this in real life too. 🙂 Of course, I have never been the _target_ of such flaming. 😉 I guess I just asked for it now though… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-is-so-hostile-these-days-not-just-the-pit/235005.md?page=4)