# SDMB poster Shodan put his hands on his own adopted child **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 16, 2018, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639 "2018-11-16T19:39:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2018, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/61 "2018-11-17T16:43:43Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > That said… leave the goddamned kids out of it. That’s not remotely okay. Sayin’. Shodan really ought to stop putting his hands on them. ---
**Author:** ![sps49sd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@sps49sd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sps49sd)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2018, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/62 "2018-11-17T19:11:22Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > I think there’s also a bit of confusion here between the phrases “putting his hands on” and “laying a hand on”.\* > > “To lay a hand on” is routinely used, typically with a negative construction, as synonymous with “to hit” or “to hit even slightly”. As in _“But officer, I didn’t lay a hand on him! He got those bruises when he tripped and fell!”_ I read that as “I didn’t even touch them at all, so the assertion that I hit hard enough to injure is preposterous!” ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/63 "2018-11-18T00:28:43Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > That said… leave the goddamned kids out of it. That’s not remotely okay. This isn’t really about his kids. Plus, if he has no problem with the thread title, I don’t see why anyone else should. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/64 "2018-11-18T00:36:47Z")
> [@Lance\_Turbo](#): > > I’m good. > [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > Your OP isn’t. Bam! Humor, simplicity, brevity, it has it all. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/65 "2018-11-18T00:43:12Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > I think you misunderstand. It’s not about whether they laid hands on you, but about whether you laid hands on them. > > To clarify: > > Sarah sees you waving at a friend with your left hand while you hold a sandwich in your right hand. Sarah is hungry. She reaches across your body to try to grab the sandwich. Surprised, you stop waving, and lower your left hand and bring it close to your body. In the process, your wrist, or maybe the base of your hand, lightly brushes the elbow of Sarah’s arm, the arm she’s trying to grab your sandwich with. > > The question isn’t, did Sarah lay hands on you? > > The question is, did you lay hands on Sarah? > > Shodan claims you did, because he’s a dumbass troll. Could be the alcohol, but that logic is bewildering. No, neither would be laying hands on someone, at least not in my experience. While I don’t think the term necessarily means beating someone up, it generally means grabbing them in an aggressive way, again, in my experience with the rather archaic term. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/66 "2018-11-18T01:00:16Z")
> [@XT](#): > > Could be the alcohol, but that logic is bewildering. No, neither would be laying hands on someone, at least not in my experience. While I don’t think the term necessarily means beating someone up, it generally means grabbing them in an aggressive way, again, in my experience with the rather archaic term. Exactly. It’s idiomatic. But Shodan is choosing, for trollish reasons, to interpret it as though the word “lay” has the same literal meaning as “touch,” and to lay a hand on someone means to touch them, however briefly or unintentionally, with any part of the hand. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/67 "2018-11-18T05:37:48Z")
Uh, guys? Those arrows beside quoted posts that let you see the context are still there. No need to ask what he meant. ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/68 "2018-11-18T14:14:29Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Uh, guys? Those arrows beside quoted posts that let you see the context are still there. No need to ask what he meant. Thanks man. Very helpful. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/69 "2018-11-18T15:03:55Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Uh, guys? Those arrows beside quoted posts that let you see the context are still there. No need to ask what he meant. These lessons in messageboard navigation are priceless! ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/70 "2018-11-18T17:38:07Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Uh, guys? Those arrows beside quoted posts that let you see the context are still there. No need to ask what he meant. > [@Lance\_Turbo](#): > > Thanks man. Very helpful. > [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > These lessons in messageboard navigation are priceless! BigTsplaining! ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/71 "2018-11-18T17:43:57Z")
FWIW, my post was sincere. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/72 "2018-11-18T17:50:31Z")
Is it just me or is this thread just a nothing-burger? ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2018, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/73 "2018-11-18T18:00:57Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Is it just me or is this thread just a nothing-burger? Just you. ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2018, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/74 "2018-11-19T17:06:52Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Since **Lance** wants to be a passive aggressive dick today… Every day. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/75 "2018-11-20T02:08:01Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > These lessons in messageboard navigation are priceless! Do you have some sort of personal problem with me? Because I have no beef with you. I defend you when people are unfair to you, and generally respect what you have to say, even when we disagree (which is actually not all that often). Because this post is just weird. Look at the start of this thread. Multiple posters didn’t understand the OP. Some were even so bold as to attack Lance for not making sense. All because they didn’t click that link and find out what he was talking about. At first I was going to be condescending about it, defending **Lance** from these unfair posts. I was going to call people too lazy to click a link. (One they know is safe, so that excuse doesn’t fly.) But then I realized some of them just might not know. They might be using the new mobile theme where the arrow is harder to see. Or maybe they just never learned about it or forgot It’s happened many times before. So I made a nice, friendly post for them, rather than being an ass about it. But, in the back of my mind, I knew someone would find an excuse to mock me over it. Just didn’t expect it to be a poster I respected. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/76 "2018-11-20T02:11:24Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Do you have some sort of personal problem with me? Because I have no beef with you. I defend you when people are unfair to you, and generally respect what you have to say, even when we disagree (which is actually not all that often). > > Because this post is just weird. > > Look at the start of this thread. Multiple posters didn’t understand the OP. Some were even so bold as to attack Lance for not making sense. All because they didn’t click that link and find out what he was talking about. > > At first I was going to be condescending about it, defending **Lance** from these unfair posts. I was going to call people too lazy to click a link. (One they know is safe, so that excuse doesn’t fly.) But then I realized some of them just might not know. They might be using the new mobile theme where the arrow is harder to see. Or maybe they just never learned about it or forgot It’s happened many times before. > > So I made a nice, friendly post for them, rather than being an ass about it. But, in the back of my mind, I knew someone would find an excuse to mock me over it. > > Just didn’t expect it to be a poster I respected. Relax, he was just making a little joke. No big deal. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/77 "2018-11-20T03:57:52Z")
**BigT** it was a bad OP. Sure we could have clicked on the link (I did, actually), but a little effort is always nice. In many forums, it’s a requirement even. Here, in the Pit, **Lance** got about what he should have expected. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/78 "2018-11-20T04:07:41Z")
> [@BlankSlate](#): > > Is Shodan the Trumptard still pretending not to be a trumptard? Coz he’s running all around the board defending Trump like some kind of fucking trumptard. > > ETA: Shodan is lying. He’s telling lies. He knows perfectly well that Acosta didn’t “put his hands” on the intern, so he’s chosen to deliberately lie about it. Liar. Yeah, by now we’ve ALL seen the original video, and the “doctored” one. We know it’s bulfuckingshit. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/79 "2018-11-20T05:05:40Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Do you have some sort of personal problem with me? Because I have no beef with you. I defend you when people are unfair to you, and generally respect what you have to say, even when we disagree (which is actually not all that often). > > Because this post is just weird. > > Look at the start of this thread. Multiple posters didn’t understand the OP. Some were even so bold as to attack Lance for not making sense. All because they didn’t click that link and find out what he was talking about. > > At first I was going to be condescending about it, defending **Lance** from these unfair posts. I was going to call people too lazy to click a link. (One they know is safe, so that excuse doesn’t fly.) But then I realized some of them just might not know. They might be using the new mobile theme where the arrow is harder to see. Or maybe they just never learned about it or forgot It’s happened many times before. > > So I made a nice, friendly post for them, rather than being an ass about it. But, in the back of my mind, I knew someone would find an excuse to mock me over it. > > Just didn’t expect it to be a poster I respected. Jesus, you are just fucking _endlessly_ tedious. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2018, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639/80 "2018-11-20T05:17:09Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Jesus, you are just fucking _endlessly_ tedious. What do you think the “T” stands for? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sdmb-poster-shodan-put-his-hands-on-his-own-adopted-child/824639.md?page=5)