# Sealemon88 Names Your Fish! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 28, 2000, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553 "2000-04-28T15:26:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Tally-Ho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@Tally-Ho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tally-Ho)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2000, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/41 "2000-05-01T16:25:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > > Chrisbar: The chamelionfish. This clever little “roleplayer”, hailing from the Med. Sea, changes color to fit in with other schools of fish. This creature is a speedy breeder, going out of its way to make sure its “count” is as high as possible. > > \*\* I love it, Sealemon! Just perfect! 😃 Chrisbar ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2000, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/42 "2000-05-02T08:19:07Z")
Can I get a fish too? Please? ---
**Author:** ![Spiritus\_Mundi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Spiritus\_Mundi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiritus_Mundi)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2000, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/43 "2000-05-02T17:01:13Z")
> [@](#): > > Spiritus Mundi: The Ghost. This old legend describes what is possibly the last of its kind. Reports describe the Ghost as an etherial serpent that haunts the coast of Florida. Either this creature is an urban legend, or it is too intellegent to be captured for further study. Thank you. I am slithering of immediately to hceck out my entry on [http://www.snopes.com](http://www.snopes.com) ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2000, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/44 "2000-05-03T15:09:29Z")
Howzabout the Bump Fish? 😃 Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2000, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/45 "2000-05-03T22:13:51Z")
Arnold Winkelried: The Swiss Army Turtle. This fresh water reptile hails from the rivers of Swizterland, although it can be found in other Europena contries as well. The Swiss Army Turtle is omniverious, and has one claw designed for gutting fish and one scoop like claw designed for digging up roots. It is equally at home on dry land as it is in the frozen lakes and rivers. Otto: The Sea Zepplin. This deep water fish is a true behemouth, weighing in at several tons. Mottled grey, this 60 foot-long fish must spend all its time “assimulating” other fish, as its metabolism is unusually fast. The plus size to this is that the Sea Zepplin swims much fater than its bulk would suggest. It has a heightened low-light vision, which is so sensative, it can even navagate by starlight when it surfices(sp). ChiefScott: The Leviathan. This creature is possibly the largest animal on the planet. It moves very slowly, scanning the waters with its exceptionjal sonar. When prey (I.E. any other creature) is found, it sends out a swarm of Shrikefish to attack. The leviathan has a symbiotic relationship with the shrikefish, as it offers the protection of its razor-sharp flukes and saber-like teeth, in echange for the food retreval service. MoosieGirl: The Ontario Otter. This cute little critter is very playful and mischivious. It is known for teasing and seducing beavers, other ottors ,racoons, and the occasional Canadian Mountie into bringing it food, leaves for shelter, ect. Its slick fur coat keeps it warm in the winter, and it almost frictionless surface means this ottor _moves_ through the water. ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2000, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/46 "2000-05-03T22:38:07Z")
I think I should be reeled into this topic. I would like a fish too. When you are done with me just release me and I will swim away from this topic. Keith ---
**Author:** ![brittainy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a88e4f/32.png) [@brittainy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brittainy)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2000, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/47 "2000-05-03T22:42:23Z")
Hey, I’ve always wanted to be a fish! ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2000, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/48 "2000-05-03T23:17:19Z")
Gonna get to the rest soon sealy? Or have you about run outta gas? ( you’re doing great so far ) ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/49 "2000-05-04T00:26:55Z")
Fine, he “gets to the rest” and ignores me… _SOB!_ ---
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/50 "2000-05-04T00:38:47Z")
Yeah, I throw no less than nine aquatic puns into one post… and still no fish… _snif_☹ …or maybe it’s because of all those puns that I haven’t gotten a fish… 😕 ? ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/51 "2000-05-04T05:14:47Z")
Sealemon called me fat and grey. I don’t think I like this game anymore. ---
**Author:** ![DVous\_Means](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@DVous\_Means](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DVous_Means)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/52 "2000-05-04T05:36:16Z")
Sealy, do you have a name for me? ---
**Author:** ![SanibelMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@SanibelMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanibelMan)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/53 "2000-05-04T05:41:49Z")
How’d I miss out on this before? I want in. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/54 "2000-05-04T13:07:15Z")
> [@](#): > > Fine, he “gets to the rest” and ignores me… > > _SOB!_ You know better than that, Falc… Falcon: The Chat Runner. The discovery of this amazing little fish has solved one of the great mysteries of marine biology: How those schools of fish always seem to know when to turn as one. The chat runner is almost microscopic, and close observation shows that they will swim up to the larger fish, and vocalize almost inaudible tones into the ear canals of their larger brethern. without fail, the school of fish will change direction seconds after recieving the instructions (Bet ya thought I was gonna call you a Sea Hawk or something, huh?;)). weirddave: The melting rainbow. This relative of the rainbow trout is very bright and colorful. Its rearward oriented gills are the cause of its distinctive backwards swimming. However, no one has a working theory for the fish’s practice of occasionally swimming upside down and humming. wevets: The wevet. This small river fish is fairly nondescript. About 3-5 inches, light grey to dark grey. It is a pretty decent food fish, tasting somewhat like haddock. Of course, most will remember the fish’s claim to fame: The terrorist incident that took place on April 1st, 1996, when a disgruntled fisherman carted 15 boxes of dynamite onto his small boat, and set off a series of explosions along the Rio Grande. After he was finally caught and arrested, he explained that he had been trying to catch a fish, through any means necessary: “I weally, weally want that fish”, the speech-impaired fisherman explained. “And I’m gonna get that little so-and-so, too. Now be vewy quiet. I’m hunting wevets. Ah huh huh huh huh.” red\_dragon60: The Mexican Firebrand. This fish extrudeds a chemical over its skin for protection. However, unlike the psychotropic properties of certain exotic frogs, The Firebrand depends on its incredably spicy excretions to keep from being eaten. Unfortuantly, it is this natural spiceness that causes the Firebrand to be fished as a delacacy. It has been rated to be five times hotter than a poblano pepper. The popularity of this fish has caused it to be ratedas the number one cause of heartburn in Texas, Mexico, and Louisiana. ---
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/55 "2000-05-04T14:14:16Z")
Woo Hoo!! Thanks, Sealemon! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![brittainy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a88e4f/32.png) [@brittainy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brittainy)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/56 "2000-05-04T14:23:47Z")
Hey I still haven’t been fished yet. ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/57 "2000-05-04T22:47:58Z")
I thing I’m being ignored too. P.S. This post was just a traw(ler). Keith ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2000, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/58 "2000-05-04T22:57:42Z")
The Swiss Army Turtle! I love it! On my next trip back home, I will be scanning the rivers and lakes for a sight of this elusive creature. I’ll bring back photos. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2000, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/59 "2000-05-05T12:59:05Z")
> [@](#): > > Me, me, me. Not a catfish, please, or I’d have to hurt you, though. You’ve got it! Kat: the fish cat. This feline hybrid normally disturbing looking (with its scaly hide, gills in place of ears, and dorsal fin), but when it swims in the water, it TRULY looks…really silly. Tengu: The Snoper. this fish does NOT exist. No. Really. I’m serious. Nothing to see here, now move along. Talkinsquirrel: The ummm…squirrelfish (Sorry). This eel-like piscine is so named for its habit of squirreling away shrimp and crawfish for the winter, which is especially strange since it lives mainly in the Gulf Of Mexico. I _will_ get to the rest, as soon as I can jump start my senile brain. Esprix, my vengence will be mighty. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2000, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553/60 "2000-05-05T13:24:20Z")
> [@](#): > > Esprix, my vengence will be mighty. Oh, no no no - you can’t take vengeance on vengeance, dear boy. We’re _even_. If you take another stab at me, then you’ll owe me one _again_, so I’d be careful if I were you. 😃 Esprix [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sealemon88-names-your-fish/16553.md?page=4)