# Secret shame...
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [September 27, 2001, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207 "2001-09-27T23:09:08Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Lodrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lodrain)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2001, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/1 "2001-09-27T23:09:08Z")
I… Like to jump onto my bed, full out, arms spread, and hit hard with my chest. I do this without regard to the carefully-smoothed sheets I laid out when I woke up, and sometimes even do this on others’ beds!
I’m so ashamed…
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### Author:  [@Kamandi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamandi)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2001, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/2 "2001-09-27T23:44:52Z")
I like to sing _There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly_ whenever I cook dinner. In a Burl Ives kind of voice. It drives my wife out of the kitchen every time.
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### Author:  [@Myrnalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrnalene)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2001, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/3 "2001-09-27T23:50:10Z")
I have a mystery snail in my aquarium. He goes around and around, sucking all the algae off the sides. He’s very cute. I like to kiss his snaily mouth through the glass as he goes by.
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### Author:  [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2001, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/4 "2001-09-27T23:58:04Z")
Just one word change here…let’s see:
“I like to kiss his snaily ass through the glass as he goes by.”
There- that’s better!
I don’t know if I have a secret shame…I don’t have many secrets.
Ummmmm…I don’t floss.
Zette
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### Author:  [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/5 "2001-09-28T00:00:48Z")
Sometimes when I shop for groceries, I’ll get a treat just for me and not tell the family about it - I may even eat it in the car before I get home.
But I deserve an occasional treat, right? After all the things I do for them, right??
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### Author:  [@Reeder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeder)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/6 "2001-09-28T00:06:16Z")
I like Pauly Shore.
Go ahead hate me.
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### Author:  [@Myrnalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrnalene)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/7 "2001-09-28T00:34:54Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zette \*
> \*\*Just one word change here…let’s see:
>
> “I like to kiss his snaily ass through the glass as he goes by.”
>
> There- that’s better!\*\*
Duh! His snaily ass is all tucked up under his shell, on the side facing away from me. I can’t reach it.
Otherwise, I probably would.
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### Author:  [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/8 "2001-09-28T00:44:14Z")
I like you, Myrnalene. Thanks for taking that well and giving it right back!
Zette
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### Author:  [@Myrnalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrnalene)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/9 "2001-09-28T00:54:51Z")
Hey Snail! **Zette** likes us! \
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### Author:  [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/10 "2001-09-28T01:15:34Z")
I like Barry Manilow.
And Sonny and Cher.
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### Author:  [@NerdBoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NerdBoy)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/11 "2001-09-28T01:18:22Z")
I…
I…
Well, umm…
I’m that guy at all the stoplights in the car next to you, picking his nose.
Oh, for shame!
_hides face_
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### Author:  [@Jet\_Jaguar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jet_Jaguar)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/12 "2001-09-28T01:19:54Z")
I listen to Art Bell via streaming internet audio at work.
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### Author:  [@TheOtherOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheOtherOne)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/13 "2001-09-28T01:20:38Z")
For about two years I was convinced that a “Longaberger” was “one who eats deoderant and makes a hobby out of looking up other people’s noses”. Thanks to my brother 🙂
That was a long time ago, I swear…
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### Author:  [@Nonny\_Mouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nonny_Mouse)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/14 "2001-09-28T01:34:54Z")
I think Jar Jar Binks is a hottie!
Okay, just kidding, but I’m one of the few people who liked the character.
Nonny
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### Author:  [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/15 "2001-09-28T02:14:12Z")
I like to post to this message board, see, and there’s this forum on it … and it’s called MPSIMS … an’ I get to call myself something COMPLETELY different from my RL name … like Ice Wolf.
Sometimes, I am so ashamed by it all …
Okay, okay, I’m going …
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### Author:  [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/16 "2001-09-28T03:07:16Z")
I bought the Olethlings[sup]TM[/sup] both a Carpenters and ABBA greatest hits CD last summer as a prelude to driving to visit my brother. I just couldn’t take the full bore kiddie songs anymore. Now I get to listen to _Mama Mia, Super Trouper, Fernando_ and _Money Money Money_ whenever the kids are in the car. I have only myself to blame.
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### Author:  [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/17 "2001-09-28T03:37:17Z")
When nobody was looking, I ate most of the French Silk filling out of a pie.
With my fingers.
Then I put the empty crust back in the fridge.
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### Author:  [@papergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/papergirl)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/18 "2001-09-28T03:50:54Z")
When MrBodyPoet and the older kids are getting ready for work/school, I get up and do housework. Very industrious.
Then after they all leave, the babies and I go back to bed and nap until lunchtime.
Ahhhh, bliss!
~k
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### Author:  [@Eternal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eternal)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/19 "2001-09-28T04:39:27Z")
I strangle streetpeople in alleys.
But then again I’m not so ashamed by it as seduced by the power that I feel it instills in me.
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### Author:  [@Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soul_Brother_Number_Two)
#### Post date: [September 28, 2001, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-shame/84207/20 "2001-09-28T04:53:39Z")
i scratch my balls and sniff my fingers. and then i help myself to popcorn.
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