# Secret Underpants Gnome **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 3, 2001, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585 "2001-09-03T23:25:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2001, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/1 "2001-09-03T23:25:01Z")
I was going to call this the “White Underpants Exchange” after **thinksnow** ’s sterling effort. But the underpants don’t have to be white and I think it would be better if it wasn’t actually an exchange. So, this is like a “Secret Santa Exchange” only not at Christmas and it’s all about underpants. Send an e-mail to [pantsofunder@yahoo.com](mailto:pantsofunder@yahoo.com) Let me know your real address (who wants virtual underpants?) and what size underpants you wear. If you specifically _do_ or _do not_ want a thong, note that too. If you feel extra crazy, and think you’ll get lucky you can tell me all your sizes, and I’ll pass the info on to your Special Underpants Gnome. It works like the “White Elephant Exchange”. You get a name, and send them underpants. Whatever you want. Big, little, boxers, briefs, bikini, whatever. Keeping it gender-traditional is encouraged, but it’s not really a requirement. Sign up and play. You could live the thrill of Underpants in the Mail from someone you may not even know. What could be better? The sign up ends around the end of the week, so don’t think too hard before you send your info. -Rue. (the Head Underpants Gnome for this game.) ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2001, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/2 "2001-09-03T23:27:04Z")
Oh, if your name is a little… androgenous, you might want to say “boy or girl” too. Or you could just take your chances. It’s your call. You don’t even have to give your real name. You could have underpants sent to an alias. ---
**Author:** ![Elenfair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cc9497/32.png) [@Elenfair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elenfair)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2001, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/3 "2001-09-03T23:43:11Z")
I think someone forgot to take his medication, hmm? Come on, Rue, the guys in the white coats are here to bring you “home.” You have to take those blue pills, dear one. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2001, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/4 "2001-09-03T23:58:21Z")
Do not mock the Head Underpants Gnome, for he is cruel. If you mock, you may not get your underpants _at all!!_ Bwahahahahaha!!! ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2001, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/5 "2001-09-03T23:59:42Z")
**Cranky** , we’ve created a monster…er, a Gnome, anyway. Well, I’m in. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/6 "2001-09-04T00:08:20Z")
Can I have **thinksnow** ’s underpants? ---
**Author:** ![ladyfoxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ad7895/32.png) [@ladyfoxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ladyfoxfyre)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/7 "2001-09-04T00:13:28Z")
I think I’ll just get in touch with **bean\_shadow** and **ShibbOleth** myself. **Beanie** needs to get some crazy underpants and it makes **Shibb** happy when I buy new underpants. I could kill two birds with one stone…er, one pair of underpants. **Elenfair** , look out. Nothing’s more embarassing than coming up short in an underpants transaction. :::shudder::: ---
**Author:** ![Elenfair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cc9497/32.png) [@Elenfair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elenfair)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/8 "2001-09-04T00:20:18Z")
Yeah, but what about those who don’t even wear 'em? Err… Yeah. ::: sticks her tongue out at Rue :::: ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/9 "2001-09-04T01:11:34Z")
Something Underpant This Way Comes to the Straight Dope, I swan. I can’t open a thread, it seems without underpants staring me in the face. :::crossing legs demurely::: ---
**Author:** ![Albert\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Albert\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Albert_Rose)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/10 "2001-09-04T04:53:09Z")
Do I need to specify _Clean_ or _Already Worn_? I’d really like to wear someone’s plaid lacy cotton… Uh. That’s not how it works, is it? Oh, dear. **Elenfair** , if you get a box from me, don’t open it. Just refuse to pay the postage due and they’ll send it back. ---
**Author:** ![Corrvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bbce88/32.png) [@Corrvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corrvin)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/11 "2001-09-04T05:11:02Z")
AlbertRose writes, " Do I need to specify Clean or Already Worn? I’d really like to wear someone’s plaid lacy cotton… Uh. That’s not how it works, is it?" It’d have to be something special to talk me out of my Most Favoritest Plaid skivvies. Do we have any words of inspiration? Would I get something groovy in return? Corr ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21825_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/12 "2001-09-04T10:34:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Elenfair \* > \*\*I think someone forgot to take his medication, hmm? > \*\* My thoughts exactly… Followed by a mental image of **Rue** in a room full of random underpants. Mrs. Rue should be informed of these nefarious goings-on… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Elenfair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cc9497/32.png) [@Elenfair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elenfair)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/13 "2001-09-04T10:38:37Z")
Fairychatmom, I agree… wholeheartedly. AlbertRose, I can send you a lesson plan for the “History of Underpants” which, by the way, was a kick-ass lecture series I gave a few years back. MrsRue must be made aware of this… before Rue starts running wild & streaking on the boards… Oh. Wait. Too late. ---
**Author:** ![Francesca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 10:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/14 "2001-09-04T10:49:30Z")
I’m with you **FairyChatMom** , except that I imagine him standing in room full of underpants suddenly looking bewildered, blinking owlishly and saying “What… what am I doing here?” ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21825_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/15 "2001-09-04T10:51:04Z")
Streaking? He was streaking and I missed it?!? Dang, turn away for a few minutes and you miss the good stuff. I’m starting to think that **Unlce Rue, Story Guy** might just be a dirty old man… or a dirty young man… which would explain why I keep having those dreams… but I digress… [sub]Can’t believe I missed the streaking… ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/16 "2001-09-04T12:12:00Z")
let us discuss this intrest you have in dirty underpants… :rolleyes: On second thought, let’s not. Go ask \*\*Hiyruu \*\* for his dirty underpants. I’m sure he’d be _happy_ to help. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/17 "2001-09-04T13:06:47Z")
Hey, **Rue** , is the Head Underpants Gnome in touch with the Head Socks Gnome? 'Cause I _really_ need to have a word with that guy about the umpteen-thousand unpaired socks I have around here … ---
**Author:** ![beckwall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b487fb/32.png) [@beckwall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beckwall)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/18 "2001-09-04T16:04:32Z")
I don’t know if I want to participate, but I did love the episode of South Park with the underpants gnomes. That kid Tweek, all frazzled out on too much coffee - genius! And the little underpants gnome who’s been beaten on by Cartman saying, “That all you got, pussy?” Too much fun. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21825_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/19 "2001-09-04T16:58:23Z")
I’ve been puzzling over this since I first opened this thread - is this a sneaky way for **Rue** to find out how big our butts are?!? I’m thinking he’s a seriously sick puppy… 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Rue\_DeDay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/41988e/32.png) [@Rue\_DeDay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rue_DeDay)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2001, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585/20 "2001-09-04T17:37:26Z")
I’ve been out of the loop for too long to answer all of the questions raised so far. So, as always, I’ll just do whatever I want and you can figure the rest out for yourself. **How the Underpants Exchange works** You send me an e-mail to the address in the OP. If you send it to my regular e-mail address, who knows what will happen. I send you a Underpants Partner. It could be a straight swap, one on one, as it were, or it could be more random. _It depends on if anyone actually wants to play._ ( **thinksnow** ’s in and now he can’t back out. Bwahahahaha!) You go _buy_ a pair of _new_underpants and send them to your Underpants Buddy. (That makes you an Underpants Gnome. If you don’t put your name in the return address you are a Secret Underpants Gnome.) You can buy lots and lots of underpants and shower your Underpants Buddy with various and sundry underpants. But you only have to send one pair. And they don’t have to be white. See? What could be easier? The whole point of this is to spread a little Underpants Joy. (Or “Little Underpants Joy” if your Gnome is feeling sexy.) Truthfully, who wouldn’t be happy to get underpants in the mail. Even if you never wear them, they make for a great story. “Well, this one time, I got underpants in the mail…” And don’t think of it as a big butt. Think of it as more wonderfulnes than average. Or something. Be proud of your butt, and your randomly sent underpants. -Rue. (who’s getting a little steamed that no one wants to play.) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secret-underpants-gnome/79585.md?page=2)