# Secrets to happiness

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [August 3, 2022, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034 "2022-08-03T16:15:32Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 9\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\
**Post date:** [August 5, 2022, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/21 "2022-08-05T15:27:02Z")

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I think that’s a big one. If you don’t expect much but you get more, that’s a pleasant surprise. Otherwise you get the satisfaction of knowing you were right. 😉

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**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\
**Post date:** [August 5, 2022, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/22 "2022-08-05T17:12:17Z")

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In the last month,

- Water heater went out
- Heat stove went out
- A water leak caused a shit load of damage. Drywall and all of our laminate wood floor (not related to the above)
- Let’s see, My Wife got COVID
- I got COVID (only a mater of time IMHO)
- My mother needs much more help than I can provide. She went downhill fast. She lives 100 miles away.

For myself, the secret is attitude. None of the above is the end of the world. Sure it sucks, but we’ll get by. I’m happy.

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**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [August 5, 2022, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/23 "2022-08-05T21:17:24Z")

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Beer.

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**Author:** ![Dr.Strangelove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.strangelove/32/6613_2.png) [@Dr.Strangelove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Strangelove)\
**Post date:** [August 5, 2022, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/24 "2022-08-05T21:29:14Z")

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> [@control-z](#):
>
> I think that’s a big one. If you don’t expect much but you get more, that’s a pleasant surprise.

I think it’s important to not be pessimistic or cynical, though. It’s a bit of a trick, I suppose. Keep your expectations low, but also don’t assume everything sucks by default. Mainly, don’t tie your happiness to exceeding some arbitrary, high level of “success”.

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**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2022, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/25 "2022-08-06T14:01:08Z")

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Don’t grow up and lose faith.

That right there contains ALL the secrets to happiness(maybe even beer)

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**Author:** ![peedin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peedin/32/14095_2.png) [@peedin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peedin)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2022, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/26 "2022-08-06T14:54:03Z")

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1.Control is an illusion.  
2. It’s them, not you.  
3. There is no number 3 at this time.

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**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\
**Post date:** [August 7, 2022, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/27 "2022-08-07T14:00:21Z")

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A healthy balance of work and play.

Too much work and not enough play, you get stressed out and miserable.

Too much play and not enough work, great fun at first, but you eventually feel aimless, dissipated and useless.

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**Author:** ![Zyada](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zyada/32/3028_2.png) [@Zyada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zyada)\
**Post date:** [August 7, 2022, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/28 "2022-08-07T20:07:39Z")

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The Happiness Project  
[https://gretchenrubin.com/blog?order=asc](https://gretchenrubin.com/blog?order=asc)

This is a blog by a woman who decided to try every recommendation for how to be happier and what worked and what didn’t. What I really like about her is that she doesn’t the “my way is the only way” approach that many others do.

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**Author:** ![Al128](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/al128/32/16541_2.png) [@Al128](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Al128)\
**Post date:** [August 7, 2022, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/secrets-to-happiness/969034/29 "2022-08-07T22:08:20Z")

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happiest is not the one who has the most, but the one who needs the least.

may I suggest taking this phenomenal yale class on “science behind happiness” … free on coursera - and well worth your time!

> **[The Science of Well-Being](https://www.coursera.org/learn/the-science-of-well-being)**
>
> Learn The Science of Well-Being from Yale University. In this course you will engage in a series of challenges designed to increase your own happiness and build more productive habits. As preparation for these tasks, Professor Laurie Santos ...

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