# Seen on a sign across from Wal-Mart. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 6, 2006, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630 "2006-05-06T01:28:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/41 "2006-05-07T02:32:24Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > If she refuses to so, call her a Pharisee. Repeatedly. Appear to become very angry. Then, take a hold of your rage and say “I pray that you may come to truly know Jesus and not just his law.” Very excellent post, **DocCathode**. 🙂 Sometimes a chink in someone’s religious armor might let a little ray of reason through. Even Bible-based reason would be an improvement over blind dogmatism. ---
**Author:** ![Daffyd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daffyd/32/8923_2.png) [@Daffyd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daffyd)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/42 "2006-05-07T04:17:51Z")
> [@Harborwolf](#): > > WILDLIFE BIRDS AND DOGS LICK THEM AND CAUSE DISEASE… Now I’m worried… I have reason to believe she meant to put a dash between “dogs” and “lick”. I’ve been licking birds and dogs in my free time… What disease will I cause in my dogs if I lick them? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/43 "2006-05-07T04:42:58Z")
If that road has a lot of traffic, that’ll cause an accident when somebody tries to read the whole damn thing. Also - “DNA That Condom?” HUH? ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2006, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/44 "2006-05-07T04:50:03Z")
I think that part of the message is a call to the local police to take the condoms and use those tests you see on CSI to identify the littering fornicators/sodomites and put them behind bars where they belong. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Punkyova](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@The\_Punkyova](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Punkyova)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/45 "2006-05-08T00:20:52Z")
Off topic question - What’s an outlot? ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/46 "2006-05-08T01:41:57Z")
> [@Least Original User Name Ever](#): > > It smells like…like…victory… Yeah there she was Like disco superfly I smell sex and candy here Who’s that lounging in my chair Who’s that casting devious stares In my direction… ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/47 "2006-05-08T13:46:23Z")
Wait- someone blew up a used condom? Ewwwww. It’s bad enough that one of the individuals involved in “using” it was the one to blow it up, but does she mean that someone wandering by stumbled across a used one, and decided to inflate it by placing the base of it around their lips, then expelled their own air into it, then tied it off like a carnival balloon? Double ewwwww. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/48 "2006-05-08T13:50:56Z")
> [@McNew](#): > > Wait- someone blew up a used condom? Ewwwww. It’s bad enough that one of the individuals involved in “using” it was the one to blow it up, but does she mean that someone wandering by stumbled across a used one, and decided to inflate it by placing the base of it around their lips, then expelled their own air into it, then tied it off like a carnival balloon? > > Double ewwwww. You assume that the wearer of the condom was the one who inflated it (two ways). It could be a form of \*American Bukkake. Sounds like a new show on the Discovery Channel. I’d be watching that one. \*band name! ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/49 "2006-05-08T15:37:49Z")
Uh… Shouldn’t she be off supervising her kid? You know, the one who likes to pick up used condoms and use them as balloons? Eye, meet beam. ---
**Author:** ![Madd\_Maxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Madd\_Maxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Madd_Maxx)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/50 "2006-05-08T16:08:41Z")
> [@Least Original User Name Ever](#): > > \It could be a form of \*American Bukkake.\ There are different types of bukkake? What distinguishes American bukkake from, oh say, Brazilian or French bukkake? Is Polish bukkake as horrible as I imagine? ---
**Author:** ![Cub\_Mistress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea666f/32.png) [@Cub\_Mistress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cub_Mistress)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/51 "2006-05-08T16:21:21Z")
> [@The Punkyova](#): > > Off topic question - What’s an outlot? Outlots are those smaller bits of property on the outskirts of a shopping center development, usually. They aren’t part of the shopping center or mall proper but are accessible from the parking lots or entrance/exit roads. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/52 "2006-05-08T17:01:34Z")
> [@Harborwolf](#): > > GAH! Nut joke…Overload… > > [Here’s](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v737/Harborwolf/May2006095.jpg) the [pictures](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v737/Harborwolf/May2006094.jpg). Now you can see the full text. the woman is the unabomber like figure perched on the box. You can see the second sign laying on the ground next to the first. You might not want to mess with her. She looks a heckuva lot like [this guy.](http://www.theatlantic.com/images/printcover/200604.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/53 "2006-05-08T18:09:21Z")
> [@McNew](#): > > Wait- someone blew up a used condom? Ewwwww. It’s bad enough that one of the individuals involved in “using” it was the one to blow it up, but does she mean that someone wandering by stumbled across a used one, and decided to inflate it by placing the base of it around their lips, then expelled their own air into it, then tied it off like a carnival balloon? I know. The thing has been on the _ground_, for Og sakes! ---
**Author:** ![Velma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/85e7bf/32.png) [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/54 "2006-05-08T20:58:39Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > I’m confused. It’s possible a stray dog would eat a condom. Dogs eat all kinds of things. Semen has a high salt content and dogs (like most mammals) are attracted to salt. > > But, I can’t picture a bird species that would be interested in used condoms. It’s those perverted Barn Swallows, you take my word for it. They will put anything in their mouths. Actually I would like to see a wildlife bird lick anything. I have a picture in my mind of a bird quietly sneaking up on a condom and tentatively sticking its tongue out for a little lick. Or maybe they use them to waterproof their nests? ---
**Author:** ![whole\_bean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/96bed5/32.png) [@whole\_bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whole_bean)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2006, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/55 "2006-05-08T21:29:46Z")
“Clean up fornication” huhu? I find that a condom does a hell of a job at keeping fornication clean(er) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Punkyova](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@The\_Punkyova](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Punkyova)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2006, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/56 "2006-05-09T06:01:15Z")
> [@Cub Mistress](#): > > Outlots are those smaller bits of property on the outskirts of a shopping center development, usually. They aren’t part of the shopping center or mall proper but are accessible from the parking lots or entrance/exit roads. Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![ladybug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/46a35a/32.png) [@ladybug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ladybug)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/57 "2006-05-10T00:00:18Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > If that road has a lot of traffic, that’ll cause an accident when somebody tries to read the whole damn thing. That was my first thought when I saw the photo. Most drivers probably wouldn’t get past the first few words. ---
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/58 "2006-05-10T03:25:17Z")
In all fairness to the woman, it’s too bad her religious rant is so annoying and invites ridicule. Her basic purpose, to raise awareness of a public health issue, is laudable. She could have found a less demented way to go about it, but her civic-mindedness is a good thing for the community, if it could be channeled in a way that’s actually helpful. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630/59 "2006-05-10T03:54:12Z")
> [@Johanna](#): > > In all fairness to the woman, it’s too bad her religious rant is so annoying and invites ridicule. Her basic purpose, to raise awareness of a public health issue, is laudable. I don’t think that is her basic purpose. I think what she really wants is for people to see how holy and righteous she is. If she was really interested in public health there are much more effective ways to go about it. But those don’t give her the chance to condemn sinners from on high. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seen-on-a-sign-across-from-wal-mart/355630.md?page=2)