# "Seinfeld"/Festivus Question **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 13, 2002, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499 "2002-12-13T14:34:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/1 "2002-12-13T14:34:27Z")
My first kid was born in 1990 and that pretty much was the end of the light-hearted viewing of television situation comedies for me, so bear with my ignorance here. What was the idea behind the invention of “Festivus” on the _Seinfeld_ show? Was it supposed to be a winter holiday for non-Christians, non-African-Americans, and non-observant Jews? Or was it supposed to supercede Christmas, Kwaanza, and Hannukah altogether? This merry holiday season, when the calendar has decreed that Hannukah is already over and Christmas is still two weeks away, has left me in a salutations bind…my usual “Happy Holidays” won’t work, because I am afraid someone will say “Hannukah is OVER ALREADY and we DON’T CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS, you ANTI-SEMITIC SON OF A BITCH!!!” So I’m left with a weak “Enjoy the rest of the holidays,” or, even worse, “Happy New Year.” (I used to say “Happy Solstice,” but people started breaking out the garlic and crucifixes when they saw me coming.) So I’m kinda liking the idea of a catch-all holiday for EVERYONE. ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/2 "2002-12-13T14:41:34Z")
Remember, it is a festivus for the restofus! Now, let me air my grievances, Ike, explaining how you have disappointed me over the past year. And prepare for the feats of strength! ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/3 "2002-12-13T14:50:00Z")
I think it was supposed to supercede all of the holidays that occur this time of year, but especially Christmas: > [@](#): > > JERRY: When George was growing up… > > GEORGE: (Interrupting) Jerry, No! > > JERRY: His father… > > GEORGE: No! > > JERRY: Hated all the commercial and religious aspects of Christmas, so he made up his own holiday. > > ELAINE: Ohhhh… and another piece of the puzzle falls into place. From the horse’s mouth: > [@](#): > > FRANK: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reach for the last one they had - but so did another man. As I rained blows opon him, I realized there had to be another way! > > KRAMER: What happened to the doll? > > FRANK: It was destroyed. But out of that, a new holiday was born. “A Festivus for the rest of us!” > > KRAMER: That musta been some kind of doll. > > FRANK: She was. Don’t forget about the aluminum pole: > [@](#): > > FRANK: And at the Festivus dinner, you gather your family around, and you tell them all the ways they have disappointed you over the past year. > > KRAMER: Is there a tree? > > FRANK: No. Instead, there’s a pole. It requires not decoration. I find tinsel distracting. > > KRAMER: Frank, this new holiday of yours is scratching me right where I itch. > > FRANK: Let’s do it then! Festivus is back! I’ll get the pole out of the crawl space. …and the Feats of Strength: > [@](#): > > KRAMER: Well, Happy Festivus. > > GEORGE: What is that? Is taht the pole?! > > FRANK: George, Festivus is your heritage - it’s part of who you are. > > GEORGE: (Sulking) That’s why I hate it. > > KRAMER: There’s a big dinner Tuesday night at Frank’s house - everyone’s invited. > > FRANK: George, you’re forgetting how much Festivus has meant to us all. I brought one of the casette tapes. (Franks pushes play, George as a child celebrating Festivus is heard) > > > [@](#): > > > > FRANK: Read that poem. > > > > GEORGE: (Complaining) I can’t read it. I need my glasses! > > > > FRANK: You don’t need glasses, you’re just weak! You’re weak! > > > > ESTELLE: Leave him alone! > > > > FRANK: Alright, George. It’s time for the feats of strength. > > (George has a break down) > > GEORGE: No! No! Turn it off! No feats of strength! (Gets up and starts running out of the coffee shop) I hate Festivus! > > FRANK: We had some good times. ---
**Author:** ![carlotta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/898d66/32.png) [@carlotta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carlotta)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/4 "2002-12-13T14:52:20Z")
Look for Ben & Jerry’s Festivus flavor–that’s how I like to celebrate this special time (I am not making this up) ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/5 "2002-12-13T15:00:18Z")
That series of quotes is great-- thanks for digging them up for us. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/6 "2002-12-13T15:04:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Terminus Est \* > \*\*I think it was supposed to supercede all of the holidays that occur this time of year, but especially Christmas: > From the horse’s mouth: > Don’t forget about the aluminum pole: > …and the Feats of Strength: > (George has a break down) > > GEORGE: No! No! Turn it off! No feats of strength! (Gets up and starts running out of the coffee shop) I hate Festivus! > > FRANK: We had some good times. \*\* [/QUOTE] I think this should be reposted every year at this time, to remind us what Festivus is really all about. Kinda like that kid with the blanket on that one show who says that stuff on the stage to that other kid. Happy ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/7 "2002-12-13T15:06:29Z")
Hmm, apparently you can’t quote quotes from within a post. Anyway, my previous post was supposed to include all of the dialogue from the show… Happy ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/8 "2002-12-13T15:24:34Z")
I think the “airing of grievances” is a masterstroke. ---
**Author:** ![JustPlainBryan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/57b2e6/32.png) [@JustPlainBryan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustPlainBryan)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/9 "2002-12-13T16:11:43Z")
I know I will be celebrating Festivus this year with my family. I’m also going to be getting a Festivus pole this weekend for the office. Isn’t the official date for Festivus on the 23rd of December? ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/10 "2002-12-13T16:19:58Z")
Oh, everyone on my block is CONSTANTLY trying to outdo each other with their Festivus poles. I just know if I get a ten-foot pole this year, my neighbor will show up with a 12-footer. (Thank you, **Terminus**.) ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/11 "2002-12-13T16:29:37Z")
Some more Googling turns up the [SeinFAQ](http://www.geocities.com/hollywood/set/7217/faq.html#5.13), which pretty much says whatever was in the script. It does confirm that Festivus falls on Dec 23. Happy Festivus! ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/12 "2002-12-13T17:05:12Z")
Dec 23? That’s when gift day falls in GameCube’s Animal Crossing game. I wonder… ---
**Author:** ![lothos2002](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/df788c/32.png) [@lothos2002](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lothos2002)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/13 "2002-12-13T18:47:20Z")
Would the Festivus Airing of Grievances be a cool Pit thread or what? I don’t know how appropriate it would be though, mods? ---
**Author:** ![Peach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/67e7ee/32.png) [@Peach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peach)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/14 "2002-12-13T19:48:31Z")
**It’s Festivus miracle!!!** ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/15 "2002-12-13T20:13:23Z")
A donation has been made in the name of **THE STRAIGHT DOPE MESSAGE BOARD** to the Human Fund. The Human Fund™ _“Money for People™”_ ---
**Author:** ![Rodd\_Hill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/3ab097/32.png) [@Rodd\_Hill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rodd_Hill)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/16 "2002-12-13T20:34:51Z")
Actually, one of the guys I work with has a Festivus party every year…we use a giant aluminum tent pole from a marquee. I’m looking forward to next Monday night…my list of grievances is in preparation. ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/17 "2002-12-13T22:13:57Z")
[hyjack] My mother invented a springtime non-religious holiday called Chicken Day. I kid you not. The proper salutation is “Jolly Chicken Day.” Just another example of how horrifically similar my life is to Sienfeld. [/hyjack] And a ditto on the Ben and Jerry’s Festivus flavor. Mmmm. Gingerbread ice cream. I like. ---
**Author:** ![Harvey\_The\_Heavy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Harvey\_The\_Heavy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harvey_The_Heavy)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/18 "2002-12-13T22:15:36Z")
A few years ago, KTLA in Los Angeles actually played this episode on December 23rd. Another Festivus Miracle! ---
**Author:** ![JustPlainBryan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/57b2e6/32.png) [@JustPlainBryan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustPlainBryan)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/19 "2002-12-13T22:19:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lothos2002 \* > \*\*Would the Festivus Airing of Grievances be a cool Pit thread or what? > > I don’t know how appropriate it would be though, mods? \*\* I don’t think there would be a problem since that’s what the pit is for. I’ll email one of the mods, though. This is a cool idea! ---
**Author:** ![lothos2002](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/df788c/32.png) [@lothos2002](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lothos2002)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2002, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499/20 "2002-12-13T23:05:38Z")
Let me know what they say JustPlainBryan. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/seinfeld-festivus-question/142499.md?page=2)