# Selecting an item for aliens that best represents Earth **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 28, 2009, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813 "2009-02-28T19:32:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![LightWithoutHeattttttttttttttt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bc8723/32.png) [@LightWithoutHeattttttttttttttt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LightWithoutHeattttttttttttttt)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/41 "2009-03-03T14:00:20Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > The question in the OP reminds me of a story I read years ago about a an old farmer who is the point of contact. He ends up negotiating a trade deal for the alien’s tech, and guess what Terran idea he sells to them? > > Paint > > I wish I could remember the name of the story, or the author. Had to be at least 30 years ago that I first read it. I guess I’ll have to start re-reading all my anthologies. 🙂 My memory tells me that was Robert Heinlein, maybe? I read that story too. ---
**Author:** ![Uosdwis\_R.Dewoh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Uosdwis\_R.Dewoh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uosdwis_R.Dewoh)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/42 "2009-03-03T14:19:32Z")
A 1952 Buick sized world atlas. > [@Terrifel](#): > > In that case: Charlize Theron. > > She and I are an item. You know what hurts? Answer: Being rejected. You know what hurts even more? Answer: Being rejected and you’re the last man alive. ---
**Author:** ![StinkyBurrito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@StinkyBurrito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StinkyBurrito)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/43 "2009-03-03T14:32:54Z")
A globe. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/44 "2009-03-03T14:50:32Z")
Humanity could be pretty well summed up by a DVD collection of the entirety of Baywatch (but not Baywatch-Hawaii, that would just be silly) ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/45 "2009-03-03T14:51:32Z")
A knife. There is no tool we use more than the knife. ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/46 "2009-03-03T15:18:32Z")
> [@Uosdwis\_R.Dewoh](#): > > You know what hurts? > Answer: Being rejected. > You know what hurts even more? > Answer: Being rejected and you’re the last man alive. Quite likely. But I’m willing to take that chance. Repeatedly. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/47 "2009-03-03T16:14:01Z")
The Earth is going to be blown up. You’re going to be the only Earthman left. You’re going to be bouncing around from planet to planet. You get to bring only one thing with you. _And no one is taking a towel?!_ Sheesh… ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/48 "2009-03-03T16:17:01Z")
> [@Hal\_Briston](#): > > The Earth is going to be blown up. You’re going to be the only Earthman left. You’re going to be bouncing around from planet to planet. You get to bring only one thing with you. > > _And no one is taking a towel?!_ Sheesh… More like a Buick full of toilet paper. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/49 "2009-03-03T19:12:21Z")
> [@Uosdwis\_R.Dewoh](#): > > A 1952 Buick sized world atlas. > You know what hurts? > Answer: Being rejected. > You know what hurts even more? > Answer: Being rejected and you’re the last man alive. This reminds me of an old Emo Phillips bit: “I walked into a bar the other night, and saw a sexy lady sitting there. I walked over and said ‘Hi, my name is Emo. Can I buy you a drink?’ She looked me over and said ‘I wouldn’t sleep with you if you were the last man on Earth.’ I said ‘Lady, if I was the last man on Earth, you wouldn’t even be allowed in line!’” ---
**Author:** ![Mooch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mooch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mooch)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/50 "2009-03-03T20:57:04Z")
This thread. With links to pictures and explanations of everything described in it. ---
**Author:** ![Damfino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Damfino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damfino)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2009, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/51 "2009-03-04T18:59:39Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > The question in the OP reminds me of a story I read years ago about a an old farmer who is the point of contact. He ends up negotiating a trade deal for the alien’s tech, and guess what Terran idea he sells to them? > > Paint > > I wish I could remember the name of the story, or the author. Had to be at least 30 years ago that I first read it. I guess I’ll have to start re-reading all my anthologies. 🙂 I had to register to answer this, after lurking for some time. The story is “The Big Front Yard” by Clifford D. Simak. I think I read it in The Science Fiction Hall of Fame lo these many years ago (around 1980). Hope this helps ---
**Author:** ![janis\_and\_c0](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/janis_and_c0/32/21_2.png) [@janis\_and\_c0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/janis_and_c0)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/52 "2009-03-05T05:42:00Z")
A book of matches. Our greatest accomplishment as mankind? The invention of fire. ---
**Author:** ![Damfino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Damfino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damfino)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/53 "2009-03-05T05:54:56Z")
How about Encyclopaedia Britannica (the print version)? It would certainly fill a Buick, and there would be no question of digital incompatibility. I would guess that anything of worth in human culture would be listed there. The aliens seem to have learned English pretty well, and for further lessons they can always wait for episodes of “Sesame Street” or “Read with Mother” or suchlike ---
**Author:** ![cardinal\_fang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardinal_fang/32/15316_2.png) [@cardinal\_fang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cardinal_fang)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/54 "2009-03-05T06:05:00Z")
I believe the OP… er, aliens, asked for something that represents _Earth_, not the inhabitants of same (including those that have only been around – and will be around – for the eyeblink mankind represents on the geologic time scale). I think Earth is relatively unique amongst the universe of planets – I would give them Hydrogen and Oxygen, 2-to-1. In a Donald Duck sippy cup, sitting in a 1952 Buick’s cup-holder, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/55 "2009-03-05T06:06:26Z")
> [@Damfino](#): > > I had to register to answer this, after lurking for some time. The story is “The Big Front Yard” by Clifford D. Simak. I think I read it in The Science Fiction Hall of Fame lo these many years ago (around 1980). > > Hope this helps YES! **Damfino** , welcome to the SDMB! After I posted that I did indeed start looking through my anthologies, and found it just this evening in the Hugo winners vol. 1. It won best novelette in 1959. Excellent story, excellent author, and my thanks for knowing this off the top of your head. ---
**Author:** ![Damfino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Damfino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damfino)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/56 "2009-03-05T07:23:59Z")
Aw shucks, thanks **Snowboarder**! Actually I couldn’t remember whether it was a front yard or a back yard so had to google a bit ---
**Author:** ![newcrasher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b3f665/32.png) [@newcrasher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/newcrasher)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/57 "2009-03-05T15:00:00Z")
> [@cardinal\_fang](#): > > I believe the OP… er, aliens, asked for something that represents _Earth_, not the inhabitants of same (including those that have only been around – and will be around – for the eyeblink mankind represents on the geologic time scale). > > I think Earth is relatively unique amongst the universe of planets – I would give them Hydrogen and Oxygen, 2-to-1. > > In a Donald Duck sippy cup, sitting in a 1952 Buick’s cup-holder, of course. Yes **Cardinal**. It does not _necessarily_ have to be representative of humanity. Remember…the planet will be gone. What item would best represent the earth? Although humanity would be one of earth’s most important developments. ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2009, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/58 "2009-03-06T00:10:15Z")
> [@newcrasher](#): > > Yes **Cardinal**. It does not _necessarily_ have to be representative of humanity. Remember…the planet will be gone. What item would best represent the earth? Although humanity would be one of earth’s most important developments. To be fair, water makes up a small minority of the planet, IIRC. I think Iron would be more representative of the Earth as a whole, if I am not forgetting my Geology 101 (which, admittedly, I dropped out of in college) ---
**Author:** ![imfloating](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/bc79bd/32.png) [@imfloating](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/imfloating)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2009, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/59 "2009-03-06T04:44:17Z")
A big, green John Deere tractor. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2009, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813/60 "2009-03-06T05:09:58Z")
I’m really surprised that I immediately thought of [this sculpture](http://farm1.static.flickr.com/52/144781725_96ee5e9885.jpg?v=0/sdmb) [in the Vancouver airport](http://lh4.ggpht.com/_vCnjjoe6tSs/SDd-CVtztYI/AAAAAAAAAho/UIlE9vFyH6E/DSCN3218.JPG) and on the [Canadian twenty dollar bill](http://www.allcanada.com/html/images/Canadian20.jpg). Maybe because I was out at the airport a while ago. Still, I rather like it, and it does represent people and animals from earth. It’s prolly bigger than a Buick though. Maybe I can cram it under my seat or hide it under my towel. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selecting-an-item-for-aliens-that-best-represents-earth/487813.md?page=4)