# Self-centred, stuck-up, toffee-nosed, hoity toity, horse-riding toe-rag scumbag bastards **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 10, 2013, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018 "2013-12-10T21:35:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2013, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/21 "2013-12-11T18:12:06Z")
> [@kferr](#): > > As for **Skald’s** comment, _cunt_ and _twat_ are almost exclusively used for males. It wasn’t a comment; it was a question. If I had intended to accuse blindboyard of sexism or misogyny, I would have come straight out and done so. Rhetorical questions are for Etruscans. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2013, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/22 "2013-12-11T18:34:57Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Horse shit is the caviar of shit. I can’t think of another animals’ feces I find less repellant… Rabbit droppings are downright cute. They’re tiny little polished balls of the deepest black, dry and hard as cement with no smell whatsoever. You could almost mistake them for licorice gumdrops. But even so, don’t eat them because you think someone who happens to own a pet rabbit left some licorice gumdrops lying around. You won’t like it. Scout’s honour. Who the hell collects their rabbit’s droppings and puts them in a fucking saucer, anyway ? ---
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2013, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/23 "2013-12-11T19:21:12Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Horse shit is the caviar of shit. I can’t think of another animals’ feces I find less repellant… It’s Vegan and Organic. The OP should be picking that shit up and taking it home. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2013, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/24 "2013-12-11T19:35:37Z")
So if it was poor people renting a horse for a day, would it be ok? ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2013, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/25 "2013-12-11T21:22:47Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Horse shit is the caviar of shit. I can’t think of another animals’ feces I find less repellant… Unicorn shit is rainbow-colored and tastes like ice cream. ---
**Author:** ![blindboyard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blindboyard/32/2833_2.png) [@blindboyard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blindboyard)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 9:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/26 "2013-12-12T09:41:19Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Why do you feel the need to specify _cunt_ and _twat_ as your preferred insult? Are you saying that women riders are more guilty of this misbehavior (if misbehavior it is) than men? I saw one yesterday accompanied by a real bitch. She was holding the lead, but I doubt she was planning on dismounting to clean up any dog shit. Might not have been a bitch, but for comedic purposes I shall pretend it was. The miscreants seem to be children as often as not, but from my perpective they’re all just horses arses. ---
**Author:** ![blindboyard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blindboyard/32/2833_2.png) [@blindboyard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blindboyard)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 10:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/27 "2013-12-12T10:14:10Z")
> [@kferr](#): > > As a mountain biker in Britain I do sympathize with the OP. But if it weren’t for the equestrians we wouldn’t have the thousands of miles of bridleways open to us. > > For the confused Americans, a breakdown of the types of rights of way in England and Wales is at [wikipedia here](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rights_of_way_in_England_and_Wales). Bridleways are a pain in the arse. Byways are bad enough. Besides, I see a lot more cyclists that horses. If anyone ought to have dedicated paths, it’s us not them. > [@](#): > > As for **Skald’s** comment, _cunt_ and _twat_ are almost exclusively used for males. Bollocks. I’ve called men cunts, I’ve called women cunts. When I was a kid I called other kids cunts. I’ve called animals cunts, I’ve called family members cunts. I’ve called inanimate objects cunts. I’ve used “cunting” as an expletive and “cunted” as a past-tense verb. “to cunt”, a synonym of “to twat”, meaning to strike, as in “I was playing five a side football and I cunted the ball upfield” or “I saw the policeman and I twatted him with a half-brick”. > [@](#): > > The horse riding population in Britain (at least near me) seems to be overwhelmingly female. The only time I’ve seen more than one bloke on horseback was when I came across a hunt going up the lane. They left LOTS of fresh shit to dodge. I think that’s a fair appraisal, horse riders being mostly either women, children or men or women with children (teaching their children the value of dumping shit all over public places, in the traditional aristocratic manner, no doubt). ---
**Author:** ![blindboyard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blindboyard/32/2833_2.png) [@blindboyard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blindboyard)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/28 "2013-12-12T10:15:50Z")
> [@ZipperJJ](#): > > So if it was poor people renting a horse for a day, would it be ok? It would be surprising, is what it would be. Unless they were gypsies, but they’re basically aristocrats as far as I’m concerned. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/29 "2013-12-12T11:52:12Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > It wasn’t a comment; it was a question. If I had intended to accuse blindboyard of sexism or misogyny, I would have come straight out and done so. Have you looked through his posting history? ---
**Author:** ![sylmar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b782af/32.png) [@sylmar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sylmar)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/30 "2013-12-12T12:37:37Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > Rabbit droppings are downright cute. They’re tiny little polished balls of the deepest black, dry and hard as cement with no smell whatsoever. You could almost mistake them for licorice gumdrops. But even so, don’t eat them because you think someone who happens to own a pet rabbit left some licorice gumdrops lying around. You won’t like it. Scout’s honour. > > Who the hell collects their rabbit’s droppings and puts them in a fucking saucer, anyway ? I second Kobal2’s submission for least offensive excrement, although there are some to whom degree of offensiveness is immaterial. When my son was six he had a pet rabbit. I had a date, and had engaged a babysitter for the evening. Said babysitter arrived and shortly thereafter my date. Pleasantries and instructions were exchanged when my son entered the room, proferring closed hands to the front. “Pick a hand!” he enthused. My date smiled and dutifully selected one tiny clenched hand. The selected extremity was raised and opened, and my date stepped closer to examine the contents. “What _is_ that?” she sweetly inquired. " Bunny poop!" my son boomed, as both ladies recoiled in horror. Sneaky little tyke had hedged his bets, as the other hand was loaded too. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Bibliovore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Bibliovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bibliovore)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/31 "2013-12-12T15:07:03Z")
Horse nappies? Seriously? It’s a bloody horse. People have been riding them for far longer than they’ve been riding bicycles, and they have a right to use those paths same as you do. If you’re honestly that offended by the occasional horse-dropping, then maybe the great outdoors isn’t for you. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/32 "2013-12-12T15:40:17Z")
People have been setting fire to heretics for a long time, too. Not that having your beast of burden shit in the road is equivalent, but I don’t think “it’s been going on for a long time” is a very sound justification. ---
**Author:** ![Bibliovore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Bibliovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bibliovore)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/33 "2013-12-12T15:59:49Z")
Point conceded, but I still think the OP is being overly sensitive. As mentioned by another poster, horses will shit whenever and wherever they feel like it, and in this case they’re doing so on a pathway that’s specifically earmarked for their use. And are horse nappies an actual “thing”, or are they something the OP just made up so that he wouldn’t have to bear the sight of their turds? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/34 "2013-12-12T16:12:08Z")
> [@Sailboat](#): > > Have you looked through his posting history? I had not done so before reading this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/35 "2013-12-12T16:17:36Z")
> [@Bibliovore](#): > > Point conceded, but I still think the OP is being overly sensitive. As mentioned by another poster, horses will shit whenever and wherever they feel like it, and in this case they’re doing so on a pathway that’s specifically earmarked for their use. Well, yes, but that’s because horse owners in England have traditionally been well-heeled and wielded disproportionate political influence. In other words, every path is earmarked for their use because they have lots of money and would have it so, so it doesn’t really signify that the right-of-way is “theirs”. ---
**Author:** ![Bibliovore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Bibliovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bibliovore)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/36 "2013-12-12T16:31:00Z")
No, the right of way is not exclusively theirs and I didn’t claim it was. I’m just saying they have the right to use the path just as the OP does. They aren’t being inconsiderate when their horses decide to take a dump, and I believe the OP is being faintly ridiculous and amusingly delicate about the whole thing. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/37 "2013-12-12T17:03:45Z")
> [@Bibliovore](#): > > And are horse nappies an actual “thing”, or are they something the OP just made up so that he wouldn’t have to bear the sight of their turds? Out in the country I’ve seen workhorses fitted with rather undignified shit collection bags that seemed to be fastened to the tail. Of course, the point wasn’t hygiene or sparing people from the horror of horse apples, but to collect the precious mana for fertilizer. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/38 "2013-12-12T18:06:30Z")
The horse drawn carriages in Vienna they had the horses wearing a contraption as well. I don’t think it would work with saddle horses as the design required it being connected to the vehicle they were pulling. ---
**Author:** ![Flyer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/flyer/32/7298_2.png) [@Flyer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flyer)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2013, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/39 "2013-12-12T22:45:11Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > Rabbit droppings are downright cute. They’re tiny little polished balls of the deepest black, dry and hard as cement with no smell whatsoever. You could almost mistake them for licorice gumdrops. But even so, don’t eat them because you think someone who happens to own a pet rabbit left some licorice gumdrops lying around. You won’t like it. Scout’s honour. > > Who the hell collects their rabbit’s droppings and puts them in a fucking saucer, anyway ? This reminds me of a joke I read some time back. Q: How many people does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? A: Two–one to stir the batter and the other to squeeze the rabbit. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2013, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018/40 "2013-12-13T00:02:14Z")
I suppose the association of horses with the aristocracy is inevitable on your side of the Atlantic. That’s not the case over here–horses might be expensive but they aren’t automatically posh, any more than an expensive pickup truck would be. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/self-centred-stuck-up-toffee-nosed-hoity-toity-horse-riding-toe-rag-scumbag-bastards/676018.md?page=3)