# Selfish SOB Hub **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 6, 2005, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424 "2005-09-06T22:23:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/21 "2005-09-07T03:30:51Z")
You know, the talk of rotating medications (it’s true that people have different reactions to individual antidepressants, and some aren’t particularly known for impacting sex drive) may not be useful in the case of a fairly short-term course of drugs that she’s presumably on. Most antidepressants take some time to kick in, and it might make more sense to give up the Big O for a month or two rather than screw around even more with pharmacology. Sounds like folks are taking the OP’s venting of a bit of irritation at her husband a little too seriously, incidentally. Have you guys looked into mood stabilizers? **Qadgop** can hook you up with some Xanax if you slip him a few bucks. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/22 "2005-09-07T04:16:27Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > Have you guys looked into mood stabilizers? Us guys live our entire lives under the specter that our hormones makes us brutish thugs. Why is it when when women experience a hormonal surge we call out the biochemical National Guard? ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/23 "2005-09-07T04:18:54Z")
Gotta agree with JohnBckWLD, everybody is rushing to dump on old hubby. Everyone seems to forget they are agreeing with a psychologically disturbed (going by QtM here!) woman who is pitting her loving husband because he doesn’t like his wife hoocked on an anti-depressant drug. Way to cheer Zolaft side effects people! Y’all realize you are agreeing with the PPD, not the person - right? ---
**Author:** ![Hung\_Mung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@Hung\_Mung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hung_Mung)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/24 "2005-09-07T04:23:43Z")
He asked you when you would stop taking the medicine…he _asked_ you. He didn’t say “You need to get offa those damn pills.” That makes him a dirtbag? Clueless, probably. Insensitive, sure. Dirtbag? Whatever. You’re being dramatic. He said the wrong thing at the wrong time. Give him the benefit of the doubt. God forbid he might have actually been thinking about you. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/25 "2005-09-07T04:28:27Z")
Be careful Hung Mung, people on drugs can turn violent! ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/26 "2005-09-07T04:52:12Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > Be careful Hung Mung, people on drugs can turn violent! If she turned violent against any of the assholes making light of her problem in this thread, I’d vote to aquit her. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/27 "2005-09-07T04:57:39Z")
Could you be any more of a pussy? ::some smiley that denotes exasperation:: ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/28 "2005-09-07T05:23:40Z")
Now… far be it from me to say what your husband was really thinking, and it was certainly less than fully tactful… but damn! I know that if my girlfriend was in the same situation I’d be concerned about her happiness. Not about getting more sex, not about ‘feeling like a man because I can make her cum’, just upset that she wasn’t enjoying herself as much as she used to. My response to that would be to try to fix the problem, or at least inquire about it. “So, when will it be safe to get off the medicine so you can enjoy sex as much as you used to?” Maybe he really was worrying about your happiness and not stroking his ego? Or, um, what **Ferret Herder** said. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 10:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/29 "2005-09-07T10:26:08Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Us guys live our entire lives under the specter that our hormones makes us brutish thugs. Why is it when when women experience a hormonal surge we call out the biochemical National Guard? Because if **you’re** feeling that you’re so fucking worthless you’d be better off dead and maybe you should even work on making that point happen, then you should perhaps consider some emergency intervention ASAP as well. This isn’t a run-of-the-mill “hormonal surge.” ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/30 "2005-09-07T11:51:09Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Us guys live our entire lives under the specter that our hormones makes us brutish thugs. Why is it when when women experience a hormonal surge we call out the biochemical National Guard? What? It was a joke. About all the people taking this thread _way_ too seriously. I don’t think they’re all, or mostly, women. Man, am I the only one who’s noticed that the OP was just venting a little? Mommy and daddy ain’t gettin’ divorced over it, people. Get a grip. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/31 "2005-09-07T12:11:14Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > everybody is rushing to dump on old hubby. You’re clearly reading a different thread. There’s exactly one post assuming the husband is being a selfish bastard. Pretty much everyone else is agreeing that he’s most likely expressing a legitimate concern for HER, and just wasn’t terribly tactful about it. Which, assuming she correctly related the incident, is probably the case. ---
**Author:** ![Blackclaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e68b1a/32.png) [@Blackclaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackclaw)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/32 "2005-09-07T12:34:33Z")
> [@parthenokinesis](#): > > Fuckin Zoloft. I don’t know why doctors still use this as first response medication, as this seems to happen to everyone. Any drug which makes you gain weight, get adult acne, and totally destroy your sex drive is not an antidepressive, but a prodepressive. I’m on Zoloft and I don’t suffer from any of those effects. It works for me. In my case, Prozac had side effects that were negative and so I switched to Zoloft. Not everyone reacts the same to a given anti-depressant. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/33 "2005-09-07T15:24:40Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > **Qadgop** can hook you up with some Xanax if you slip him a few bucks. 🙂 You has best retract that statement **right now**. I am not joking. I **am** seriously pissed off. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/34 "2005-09-07T15:49:54Z")
Am I the only person who saw the title and assumed this was a thread about computers? ---
**Author:** ![zagloba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/977dab/32.png) [@zagloba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zagloba)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/35 "2005-09-07T16:18:16Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > Am I the only person who saw the title and assumed this was a thread about computers? No, you’re not, **Alessan**. In fact, Serial Object Bus, improves on USB by transferring entire objects serially rather than just bits, making it the perfect hardware implementation for database connections to object oriented databases from web based applications written in Java or .NET. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/36 "2005-09-07T16:20:35Z")
I’m taking Zoloft and it helps quite a bit. I do have a diminished sex drive and it’s takes longer to orgasm, when I feel it’s worth the bother of doing it myself. The thing is, a good orgasm is lot more mood lifting then Zoloft. Oh, and it makes me sweat like a pig. Fun! ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/37 "2005-09-07T16:39:45Z")
**Tengu** , you’re right. I overstated my point. It’s just these “Give him the benefit of the doubt” is crap to me. The OP assumed the absolute worst of her husband - he wasn’t even in a “benefit of the doubt” situation. Unlike some of the walking chemlabs that post here, this problem that **samclem** is so heroically protective of is hardly serious. She is on temporary medication that effects her orgasms? How did she ever make it through the summer? :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Uvula\_Donor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e19adc/32.png) [@Uvula\_Donor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uvula_Donor)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/38 "2005-09-07T16:40:17Z")
> [@Zebra](#): > > Oh, and it makes me sweat like a pig. Fun! The drug or rubbing one out? ---
**Author:** ![Uvula\_Donor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e19adc/32.png) [@Uvula\_Donor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uvula_Donor)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/39 "2005-09-07T16:47:50Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > She is on temporary medication that effects her orgasms? How did she ever make it through the summer? Inquiring minds want to know. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424/40 "2005-09-07T16:49:58Z")
> [@Qadgop the Mercotan](#): > > You has best retract that statement **right now**. > > I am not joking. > > I **am** seriously pissed off. OK, that was probably an overreaction on my part. But please don’t imply this again. The docs I hold in greatest contempt are those who dispense narcotics for money, and those who abuse their patients and/or the doctor/patient relationship. Carry on. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/selfish-sob-hub/320424.md?page=3)