# Semen survival question.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/semen-survival-question/704821>\
**Category:** Factual Questions\
**Created:** [November 17, 2014, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/semen-survival-question/704821 "2014-11-17T00:54:46Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Henryunderborn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/58f4c7/32.png) [@Henryunderborn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Henryunderborn)\
**Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/semen-survival-question/704821/1 "2014-11-17T00:54:46Z")

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How long can semen survive, as a functional means of procreation? This semen, is specifically on numerous kleenex tissues.

NOT… a troll… or gimmick.

I just saw Delivery Man, the American version of the Greek(?), Starbuck movie. Where all his sperm donations created some 100+ children, who sued for knowledge of their donor/father.

Well… this got me in a pickle. One particular misses, I shared some time with, collected numerous garbage bags, over the course of 8 months, some many and many, kleenexes, of such a variety.

And well shit.

Lets go by,  
1.period the science, thrown away and tossed for ruins.  
2. she manipulatively replaced every crumpled tissue within hours of my absence, to fool me that she got rid of them; where while she actually has produced an army of my spawn out there in the world, to greet me one day.

3(.) are there any sort of materials or applicants that can be applied to ‘exposed’ semen, to allow it a longer, operational security.

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**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\
**Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/semen-survival-question/704821/2 "2014-11-17T01:10:26Z")

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I believe this is the exact process used in artificial insemination.

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**Author:** ![Inna\_Minnit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Inna\_Minnit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inna_Minnit)\
**Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/semen-survival-question/704821/3 "2014-11-17T02:37:42Z")

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This is why you should jackoff in the shower.

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**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\
**Post date:** [November 17, 2014, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/semen-survival-question/704821/4 "2014-11-17T03:31:45Z")

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While the specific question about survival of sperm may be appropriate for General Questions, the rather bizarre backstory is not. Since I can’t see this developing into anything other than a trainwreck in another forum, I’m going to close this. You may reopen a more focused question on sperm survival in GQ. I would not suggest opening another thread on the rest of it anywhere.

Colibri  
General Questions Moderator