# Shagnasty and the Worst Anecdote in SDMB History **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 17, 2005, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468 "2005-02-17T02:49:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/241 "2005-02-18T17:50:16Z")
You know what this thread needs? A bar scene! Waitress: Hi! welcome to the Ultra-Snooty, 4-star Fodor’s Guide, Wine and Beer Bar! Would you like to see a menu? Guy: Um, sure. Waitress: Too bad! We don’t have one! We’re much too sophisticated for that! What can I get you to drink? Girl: I don’t care for beer or wine, so I’ll just have…milk. (7 people within earshot suddenly gasp loudly and the whole room falls silent) Girl: Errrr, that is, I mean, I’ll have…a…club soda? (crickets chirping) Girl: With a lime wedge. (the room sound returns to normal) Guy: Whew. For a minute there, I thought you were an unsophisticated simpleton. Waitress: What would you like, sir? Guy: I’ll have a Zima. ---
**Author:** ![Stonebow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Stonebow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stonebow)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/242 "2005-02-18T18:33:49Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Ordering milk is NOT “uncouth.” It’s odd, yes, but not uncouth. “Uncouth” would be if she asked for a bendy-straw and then sat there slurping it up. Why exactly asking for a bendy straw uncouth? Maybe she has a condition that makes sipping from a glass painful- sensititive teeth perhaps. Any behavior can be rationalized as acceptable if you want to dig deep enough. But your example shows me that you DO have things that you consider out of bounds/ silly or uncouth in the right situation. Just because we don’t agree where the line is, doesn’t mean there is not one. ---
**Author:** ![Debaser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3da27b/32.png) [@Debaser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Debaser)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/243 "2005-02-18T18:47:17Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > You people need to relax. Did “foodies” burn your village? No kidding. This is one of the most unusual threads ever. **Shagnasty** , your short story makes perfect sense and is not offensive in any way. To dissect the story to the extent that people are doing is just nuts. People seem to be willing to read a whole lot into it that just isn’t there. ---
**Author:** ![Kolak\_of\_Twilo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kolak_of_twilo/32/73_2.png) [@Kolak\_of\_Twilo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolak_of_Twilo)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/244 "2005-02-18T19:04:21Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > You people need to relax. Did “foodies” burn your village? Thank you. And on that note, could someone please shoot this absurdly overlong thread squarely between the eyes and put it out of its misery? And by the way, I love milk. I drink it all the time. Just **not** in a bar. ---
**Author:** ![Hellestal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3ab097/32.png) [@Hellestal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hellestal)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/245 "2005-02-18T19:12:43Z")
> [@Kolak of Twilo](#): > > Thank you. > > And on that note, could someone please shoot this absurdly overlong thread squarely between the eyes and put it out of its misery? > > And by the way, I love milk. I drink it all the time. Just **not** in a bar. **Kolak** , given time you might realize the absurdity of repeatedly posting to a thread that you believe to be unworthy of attention. And I, by the way, have a habit of asking for milk-shakes in bars. My thought-process always goes, “Bars serve drinks that people like. I like milk-shakes. Ergo, bars should have milk-shakes.” Never hurts to ask, I figure. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/246 "2005-02-18T19:17:06Z")
> [@Stricker van Gogh](#): > > And I, by the way, have a habit of asking for milk-shakes in bars. My thought-process always goes, “Bars serve drinks that people like. I like milk-shakes. Ergo, bars should have milk-shakes.” Never hurts to ask, I figure. Chocolate Milkshake 1 oz Creme de Cacao 1/2 oz Kahlua Coffee Liqueur 1/2 oz Irish Cream 1 oz Milk Pour all ingredients into a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Adjust amount of milk if desired. Shake well, strain into a cocktail glass, and serve. ---
**Author:** ![Avumede](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/avumede/32/7235_2.png) [@Avumede](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avumede)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/247 "2005-02-18T19:21:19Z")
> [@The Mad Hermit](#): > > They should have gone to the Korova milk bar. They put knives in it, making you ready for a night of ultra-violence. > > 🙂 This whole stupid thread was worth it for this comment. And it wouldn’t have been so hilarious if I hadn’t sat through a few pages of the thread, either! ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/248 "2005-02-18T19:25:56Z")
> [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > Guy: I’ll have a Zima. > [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > Guy: I’ll have a Zima. Very good sir…and you may feel comfortible that your lifestyle choice is accepted at this establishment… Actually I have a similar true story. The characters are one of our (male) Directors, myself and another Consultant. The scene - a fancy steakhouse: Director: You guys want to get some cocktails? Let’s get some cocktails! Everyone: Sure. Director: …Great! I’ll have a cosmopolitan Me: :dubious: Consultant: :eek: Waiter: 😃 Director: 😕 What? Me: Oh…nothing…that’s a fine drink… Consultant: …yes if you are a WOMAN!! Me: 😃 Oh don’t worry…I’m sure that will go great with your salad! Director: :mad: …BULLSHIT!! I drink these all the time! [to waiter] is this a woman’s drink? Waiter: 😃 …uh…oh no sir…lots of people drink them… Me: :rolleyes: Which character from Sex in the City is more likely to drink a cosmo - Carrie, or Mr. Big? Consultant: :dubious: You seem to know an awful lot about SinC… Me: :smack: and that’s not even the first time. My first job I’m out with a Partner, our client (a Sr VP from a Fortune 500 company) and another teammate. I ordered a drink that the Partner found a litttle “fruity” so he proceeded to order round after round of “girl drinks” to the table. (He didn’t force us to drink them, he just made it clear that if we wanted to drink for free on his expense account, that was the only drinks he would order). ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/249 "2005-02-18T19:29:07Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Actually I have a similar true story. Now _that_ is a good anecdote! ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/250 "2005-02-18T19:34:00Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Very good sir…and you may feel comfortible that your lifestyle choice is accepted at this establishment… So now you pop in to insult queers by implying that we drink Zima? My drink of choice is bourbon, so let’s put this to rest. Or a Coke with a slice of lemon in it. That’s some high-class shit there! ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/251 "2005-02-18T19:52:59Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > I ordered a drink that the Partner found a litttle “fruity” so he proceeded to order round after round of “girl drinks” to the table. (He didn’t force us to drink them, he just made it clear that if we wanted to drink for free on his expense account, that was the only drinks he would order). GIRL DRINK DRUNK! ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/252 "2005-02-18T21:17:49Z")
> [@andros](#): > > GIRL DRINK DRUNK! Actually yes!!..he kept chanting that!! What’s that from Kids in the Hall or something? > [@Excalibre](#): > > So now you pop in to insult queers by implying that we drink Zima? My drink of choice is bourbon, so let’s put this to rest. I don’t recall saying anything about homosexuals. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/253 "2005-02-18T22:06:34Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > I don’t recall saying anything about homosexuals. Hon, that’s what you were implying. I wasn’t offended by it, so unbunch your undies. ---
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/254 "2005-02-18T22:14:40Z")
Homosexuals drink Zima?? I tried it once, does that mean… :eek: Howzabout Smirnoff Ice?? Just kidding here guys… Carry on. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/255 "2005-02-18T23:05:11Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > What’s that from Kids in the Hall or something? [Yep.](http://www.kithfan.org/work/transcripts/three/girldrnk.html) ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/256 "2005-02-18T23:33:58Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > You people need to relax. Did “foodies” burn your village? Yes, as a matter of fact, they did! (BTW, there’s nothing wrong with drinking Zima and wine coolers-if that’s what you LIKE. I meant people who drink them because they somehow see them as “cool.” People who go out of their way to do what’s hot, what’s now, what’s “edgy”. Think that blonde-haired consultant on _The Simpsons_, the one who’s always doing the market research, and you get the idea.) ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/257 "2005-02-18T23:37:35Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > Hon, that’s what you were implying. I wasn’t offended by it, so unbunch your undies. You know, people besides homosexuals can make lifestyle choices. > [@Duke of Rat](#): > > Homosexuals drink Zima?? I tried it once, does that mean… Howzabout Smirnoff Ice?? Not homosexuals per se…but Zima’s kind of considered an effeminate drink. Now Mike’s Hard Lemonade sounds about as gay as they come. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2005, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/258 "2005-02-18T23:40:34Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Think that blonde-haired consultant on _The Simpsons_, the one who’s always doing the market research, and you get the idea.) You mean [Lindsy Neigle](http://www.duffgardens.net/images.php?pic=http://www.duffgardens.net/media/images/lindsey1.gif)? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2005, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/259 "2005-02-19T00:33:53Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > You mean [Lindsy Neigle](http://www.duffgardens.net/images.php?pic=http://www.duffgardens.net/media/images/lindsey1.gif)? Yep, that’s the one! ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2005, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468/260 "2005-02-19T00:59:58Z")
For some reason, I feel the need to experiment. Next time I’ll be in a wine bar and next time I’ll be in a fancy restaurant, I’ll order a glass of milk… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shagnasty-and-the-worst-anecdote-in-sdmb-history/290468.md?page=14)