# Share your funny sleep talking stories **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 12, 2013, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/share-your-funny-sleep-talking-stories/665986 "2013-08-12T00:50:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2016, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/share-your-funny-sleep-talking-stories/665986/61 "2016-03-06T03:36:23Z")
Whenever the Farmers Insurance commercials come on, I like to sing their jingle. One time, when the commercial wasn’t playing, I did it in my sleep: “We are Farmers! Bum-ba-dum-bum-bumbumbum!” Another time, while my sister was still awake, my mother and I did a tag-team sleep-talk in a hotel room: **Mom:** Lieutenant, close the refrigerator! **Me:** Sir, yes, sir! ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2016, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/share-your-funny-sleep-talking-stories/665986/62 "2016-03-06T03:40:44Z")
Years ago, shortly after my husband-to-be and I started co-habitating, I say bolt upright in bed and started screaming about the **SPIDER** that had just fallen from the ceiling. “ **Big, black spider**! It fell on my face! Now it’s in the bed somewhere.” I started flipping the covers back and trying to kill the spider. Husband jumped straight out of bed and started freaking out about the large spider that I was babbling about. Buck nekkid of course. It was a dream. No spider. A recurring nightmare for me, so I was quite sure there was no gigantic spider once he finally woke me up. He did ask if this happened often. (He married me anyway, so I guess I’m forgiven.) I never had the dream again after that. Karmic revenge struck back quickly. I woke up and my SO was giggling to himself. I asked him what was so funny that he woke me up laughing. He said, “I farted and it smelled so bad that I woke up.” Then he was unresponsive. I went back to sleep. In the morning, he didn’t remember it. ---
**Author:** ![dada2fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ccd318/32.png) [@dada2fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dada2fish)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2016, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/share-your-funny-sleep-talking-stories/665986/63 "2016-03-07T00:35:58Z")
“You’re killing her! Get up! YOU’RE KILLING HER!” is what I was apparently shouting. I woke up hyperventilating, heart pounding, kneeling on my bed, with the lights on, my entire family at my bedroom door, staring at me in fear. I woke myself up screaming from an awful nightmare. In it, my niece was a newborn and she was laying on a fluffy couch while a severely obese man sat down on top of her. I could see she was suffocating. The fat guy was puzzled, wondering why i was yelling at him in such a crazy manner. ---
**Author:** ![River\_Hippie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/river_hippie/32/26_2.png) [@River\_Hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/River_Hippie)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2016, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/share-your-funny-sleep-talking-stories/665986/64 "2016-03-07T01:26:47Z")
Acknowledging that this is a zombie. When I was young I shared a bedroom with my younger brother. He had a tendency to talk in his sleep and grind his teeth, etc. It never bothered me until I saw **The Exorcist**! Right after I saw that, I was sound asleep, woke up to my brother sitting up in bed, speaking in what seemed to be backwards Latin, Holy Shit! Freaked me out in a big way! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/share-your-funny-sleep-talking-stories/665986.md?page=3)