# Shirley Ujest got pitted and nobody knows... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 7, 2005, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452 "2005-07-07T14:18:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/21 "2005-07-07T17:18:13Z")
> [@featherlou](#): > > We need Straight Dope t-shirts, with all kinds of inside jokes on them. Like “Penis ensued for 20 minutes in 1960” or something. Or “What would Cecil do?” [Cite!?](http://www.cafepress.com/sickslug_12.24943409) ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/22 "2005-07-07T17:51:11Z")
Maybe this is in the spirit of the original “disappearing thread”, but I think we gotta go back and appreciate how lame that joke was. . . First of all, I think that everyone of us thought of 15 jokes the nano-second we saw the thread title. So, you just gotta hold it in when you know everyone else has thought of it. Second of all, her joke didn’t even really make sense because it was “smallest living organism with a brain”, not “organism with the smallest brain” (which is what she ‘riffed’ on). Third, she used the old 1-2 construct. The what? 1. Make joke. 2. Say “sorry, thought you meant. . .” That’s just a rough, rough way to try to get a laugh. Fourth, a lawyer joke? Oh my. At least if she said something like “Poland!” it would have had a nice Archie Bunker air to it while also being a bit incongruous in it’s agreement, always a nice touch, IMHO. Actually, it was so godawful and useless that I actually appreciate the amount of gall it took to click the submit button. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/23 "2005-07-07T18:10:49Z")
> [@NurseCarmen](#): > > [Cite!?](http://www.cafepress.com/sickslug_12.24943409) That is one of the extremely few bumper stickers I might actually put on my car. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/24 "2005-07-07T19:21:28Z")
I saw it too! I clicked on it, and was told I wasn’t authorized to view it. Then it disapeared. I also dream of one day getting pitted. The closest I’ve come, is being called a cunt in somebody else’s pit thread. But then, the perpetrator emailed an apology. Dammit! ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/25 "2005-07-07T19:38:40Z")
To be fair, the whole lawyers have no [soul](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=318277) shit gets a little old. We get it, you don’t like lawyers. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/26 "2005-07-07T20:11:20Z")
> [@John Carter of Mars](#): > > The OP gats banned Well, we all know that arguments about gun control belong in Great Debates. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/27 "2005-07-07T20:39:17Z")
> [@lieu](#): > > I always picture her as a young Mother Teresa with a really great ass. I… ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/28 "2005-07-07T20:49:16Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > Finally we have this thread as icing on the cake. > > Haj A cake without icing is like a day without sunshine. > [@gigi](#): > > > [@John Carter of Mars](#): > > > > The OP gats banned > > Well, we all know that arguments about gun control belong in Great Debates. Point taken! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/29 "2005-07-07T20:57:56Z")
> [@tomndebb](#): > > Why it was removed from sight, I do not know as I had no part in that action. 'Twas _moi_. It was a returning guest who started the thread, so I sent to outer space. Besides, at that point, there wasn’t much to the thread. I didn’t think poor **John Carter of Mars** would feel its loss so. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/30 "2005-07-07T21:18:54Z")
> [@SkipMagic](#): > > \ Besides, at that point, there wasn’t much to the thread. I didn’t think poor **John Carter of Mars** would feel its loss so. 😉 Aw, **Skip** , that thread had _POTENTIAL_! It was going to be the end-all of pit threads. You could just sort of feel it comin’. Then; then; phht she was gone. I’ll deal with the loss somehow, but to think that my life will ever be the same would be a grevious miscalculation. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/31 "2005-07-07T21:20:40Z")
YAY! **Shirley Pile!** I get pitted! Isn’t there suppose to be an initiation of some sort? These kind of things use to be civilized. I make a lame irresponsible joke about lawyers with no shoes… no sole…HAH! I slay myself. and yeah, it was in GQ and I shouldn’t have and in an area that is so far out of my league, a gal can dream… but…it hung there…so ripe for the picking… [intangent] I think the last thread in GQ that I fully understood was the What is the Velocity of Flatuence. Farts I understand. [/intangent] Anywhoooo. If I offended any lawyers out there and to the mods who must have bruises from the pile on, I am sorry. I shall aspire to keep my fluffy happy self to the confines of MPSIMS/CAFE/IMHO with little jumps into the Pit to amuse my vapid vaccuous (\<—note two u’s & c’s.) person leaving me to inflict the most damage with my natural attributes. I have a Ph.D in Nonsense. Please continue blaming me for Grand or Irritating Things. Thank you for allowing me to address these important issues and the opportunity to kill this thread. Carry on. ---
**Author:** ![pantom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/34f0e0/32.png) [@pantom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pantom)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/32 "2005-07-07T21:33:27Z")
[clueless pedantic English mode] May I ask what intangent is? [/clueless pedantic English mode] ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/33 "2005-07-07T21:39:43Z")
> [@pantom](#): > > [clueless pedantic English mode] May I ask what intangent is? [/clueless pedantic English mode] Parallel? Or maybe not. Ask **Shirley** , she knows. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/34 "2005-07-07T21:43:14Z")
> [@Trunk](#): > > Maybe this is in the spirit of the original “disappearing thread”, but I think we gotta go back and appreciate how lame that joke was. . . > > First of all, I think that everyone of us thought of 15 jokes the nano-second we saw the thread title. So, you just gotta hold it in when you know everyone else has thought of it. > > Second of all, her joke didn’t even really make sense because it was “smallest living organism with a brain”, not “organism with the smallest brain” (which is what she ‘riffed’ on). > > Third, she used the old 1-2 construct. The what? > > 1. Make joke. > 2. Say “sorry, thought you meant. . .” That’s just a rough, rough way to try to get a laugh. > > Fourth, a lawyer joke? Oh my. At least if she said something like “Poland!” it would have had a nice Archie Bunker air to it while also being a bit incongruous in it’s agreement, always a nice touch, IMHO. > > Actually, it was so godawful and useless that I actually appreciate the amount of gall it took to click the submit button. … _I_ thought it was funny. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/35 "2005-07-07T21:53:05Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#): > > … _I_ thought it was funny. _adds Ponder to my Xmas card list._ ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/36 "2005-07-07T23:20:36Z")
> [@lieu](#): > > I always picture her as a young Mother Teresa with a really great ass. What’s wrong with Mother Teresa’s ass? Or, rather, what **was** wrong. Sorta extra saggy now, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/37 "2005-07-08T00:42:03Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > What’s wrong with Mother Teresa’s ass? Appropriately enough, Fr. DeBosier who taught me this limerick : There was a young woman of Madras Who had such a beautiful ass Not round and pink As you probably think But gray, had long ears and ate grass. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/38 "2005-07-08T01:01:34Z")
He he he HAW ---
**Author:** ![Nic2004](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/4491bb/32.png) [@Nic2004](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nic2004)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/39 "2005-07-08T01:13:00Z")
Congrat’s to **Shirley Ujest**. We can but to aspire… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452/40 "2005-07-08T01:19:08Z")
> [@Shirley Ujest](#): > > adds Ponder to my Xmas card list. Well, _I_ thought your joke was funny too. Even though I can’t prove it now, I actually added a couple more funnies. Can I get on your Christmas card list? Huh? Huh? _smooch_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirley-ujest-got-pitted-and-nobody-knows/311452.md?page=3)