# Shirley's Doper Poll Question du Jour: Things that make you poop **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 31, 2001, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771 "2001-10-31T19:50:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/21 "2001-11-01T00:56:14Z")
**White Castle** hamburges. You know, 10 to a sack? Oh lawdy. The last time I forgot, and had some was on a music video. Some numbnuts grip said, " HEY!- There’s a White Castle a few blocks away, it’s 2:00 am and we could have hot food !". No, you son of a bitch, that’s not hot food, that’s Ex-Lax that you can chew. I was just paralyzed. Also, cooked tomatoes. Oye. 😃 Cartooniverse ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/22 "2001-11-01T01:07:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Padeye \* > \*\*I am Cornholio! Bow down before me! I need TP for my bunghole! \*\* Hee heee!!! I dont have to DO anything, every weekday morning, at 7:20 AM, give or take 5 minutes, I feel an intense need to ‘move the mail’ (nice one that is!) Weekends are a free for all. INcredible really, I get up at 7, I get two kids up, get them dressed, fed, lunches made (this is usually when the mail needs delivered) then while they are still eating I am dressing and we are out the door at 7:30. When I was at university, I suffered from shy-shitter syndrome, couldnt dump in the community bathroom. Since then I have learned to deliver the mail with lightning speed. Why am I telling you this I have NO idea. ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/23 "2001-11-01T01:23:56Z")
Coffee. Oh yeah. But that creates an ordinary, healthy poo. But every once in a while, I forget that I’m lactose intolerant, and I’ll have some cheese, milk, ice cream, or sour cream. Oh boy. Talk about poopage. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 11:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/24 "2001-11-02T11:16:35Z")
When I am at work, that is when i have to take the biggest dumps. FWIW, I work midnights at a nursing home. ---
**Author:** ![drillrod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@drillrod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drillrod)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/25 "2001-11-02T12:07:53Z")
Raisin bran and a cup of coffee is a magic combination for me. 30 minutes later I’ll be in my sanctuary and about three chapters into whatever book I happen to be reading. ---
**Author:** ![Badtz\_Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@Badtz\_Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Badtz_Maru)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/26 "2001-11-02T12:28:02Z")
Chorizo Coffee and other stimulants - cocaine and adipex are two that I know will do it. It’s been a long time since I did crystal meth but I don’t recall it having that effect on me. Sitting on certain chairs and/or in certain positions. Every weekend morning when I sit down to play some PC games I have to get up and go a few minutes later. ---
**Author:** ![Damhna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Damhna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damhna)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/27 "2001-11-02T13:11:31Z")
Im afrad the dieuretic effect of a morning smoke and a few coffees is part of my routine, it often leaves me in a dilema , trying to figure how long I have left before the urge will hit me. “Should I leave now? Will I make it to the office or should I sit here and just think poopage thoughts ?” I’m about a 5 minute walk away from work where I live at the moment. That stuff works FAAAAAst! ---
**Author:** ![Damhna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Damhna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damhna)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/28 "2001-11-02T13:16:15Z")
Oh and those Breath Freshners?Chewing Gum that say on the back “Excessive Consumption may have Laxative Effects” ??? Guess what ? They ain’t lying. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/29 "2001-11-02T13:26:09Z")
Nothing works better for me than walking into a bookstore. Go figure. ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/30 "2001-11-02T13:40:46Z")
[Here’s](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_372.html) Cecil’s original column on why _cigarettes_ do it. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/31 "2001-11-02T13:53:13Z")
Sam, thanks for finding that reference. I would like to add, that when you have kids in diapers, there is nothing like just get on the highway, the car will instantly smell of poop. Not before, when you have a chance to safely pull over in a parking lot. Must be the high speed and the unbalanced tires to jiggle it out of them 🙂 [sub]Why are my yucky threads ( I did one on the Menstrual Cup a long time ago) The most popular and the ones that \*I \*perceive as the next E=MC[sup]2[/sup] just go down the toilet? [/sub] ---
**Author:** ![mikehardware](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5fc32e/32.png) [@mikehardware](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mikehardware)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/32 "2001-11-02T13:54:13Z")
A nice bowl of raisin bran every morning works for me. As a kid, mom would give me a small glass of prune juice, and I loved the taste! One day, when she was outside, I downed a whole bottle of the stuff. Of course, that was also the last time I ever drank prune juice. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/33 "2001-11-02T15:18:30Z")
Curry chicken and noodles, extra spicy. There’s a restaurant in Minneapolis called the Sri Lanka Curry House that serves this. It’s quite hot, and it’s really damn good. I promise you this: Depending on the speed of your metabolism (no later than tomorrow morning) you will come to fully understand the meaning of the word _imperative_. And, there won’t be a lot of time between “I think I have to poop,” and “I’m about to foul my britches.” Don’t try it on a work night if you take the bus to work. ---
**Author:** ![Elvis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/958977/32.png) [@Elvis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elvis)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/34 "2001-11-02T15:45:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dire Wolf \* > \*\*I don’t shit. I had a rubber stopper surgically implanted in my ass, and I will explode when I turn 50. You’re all invited to the party. It’ll be more fun than front row seats at a Gallagher show. 😃 \*\* Yeah, but being slowly impaled and left to bleed to death is more fun than a Gallagher show. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Persephone \* > **…every once in a while, I forget that I’m lactose intolerant, and I’ll have some cheese, milk, ice cream, or sour cream. Oh boy. Talk about poopage.** I’m with you, P. Dairy gets me every time. That and Big Macs (but not other fast food burgers). And Taco Bell. Taco Bell may be the worst. I’f I’m ever constipated (and I never am–god, I lay cable at least twice a day), I’ll down some Taco Bell, a Big Mac, and finish it off with a milkshake. That’ll clear the decks. ---
**Author:** ![ShrekLookAlike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@ShrekLookAlike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShrekLookAlike)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/35 "2001-11-02T15:59:22Z")
1. Coffee 2. Raisin Bran or Grape Nuts 3. Hi Opal 4. Anxiety – Especially when getting ready to do something I’ve been dreading. 5. Big bowl of salad 6. Magnesium Citrate (I had a bad case of constipation one time and a doctor told me to drink a bottle of this stuff. Just about blew the porcelain off the toilet. You could really make a party interesting by spiking the punch with it.) ---
**Author:** ![Arwen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7c8e57/32.png) [@Arwen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arwen)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/36 "2001-11-02T16:03:46Z")
And Altoids. That was a big Ooops… used to eat them like candy, go through a box in 2 days a twork…and I wlways wondered why in the middle of the afternoon, I had the URGE, no waiting! Realized Altoids are made with peppermint oil, a laxative. I was eating enough of 'em to make it effective…beware the Altoids! “curiously strong” indeed. ---
**Author:** ![MONTY2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/53a042/32.png) [@MONTY2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MONTY2)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/37 "2001-11-02T16:36:15Z")
1. Anything dairy 2. Cigarettes 3. Alcohol 4. Burger King burgers 5. Cocaine (Haven’t touched it since November 1999 - Yeah!) ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/38 "2001-11-02T16:43:42Z")
Big steaming bowl of broccoli cheese soup. Must be the fiber in the broccoli. Will clean ya right out, next morning. ::slinks off in utter embarrasment:: ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/39 "2001-11-02T17:09:25Z")
Well, I’m a regular once a day-er, around 5:30 pm after work. If I get off that schedule, I feel all oogy and in order to get back on I’ll have a couple big glasses of apple juice. By the next day I’m back on track, without fail. I don’t smoke or drink coffee, so that’s not an option. BTW, who came up with “moving the mail”? That is priceless. Mr. Sunshine likes to say he’s “setting a bear trap” but that’s just not delicate enough for me. From now on, I’m moving the mail. ---
**Author:** ![Payne\_N.Diaz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b77776/32.png) [@Payne\_N.Diaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Payne_N.Diaz)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2001, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771/40 "2001-11-02T17:13:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by PunditLisa \* > \*\*Nothing works better for me than walking into a bookstore. Go figure. \*\* Bingo. Or maybe a trip to the library–comes from reading too much in the bathroom, I guess. Archway cookies do it for me, whether I want them to or not. about a half-hour after eating one, I’m doubled over frantically looking the loo. I must be allergic to something in them. And yes, this whole thread is TMI. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shirleys-doper-poll-question-du-jour-things-that-make-you-poop/90771.md?page=3)