# Shit just got real (FBI raids Trump lawyer) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 9, 2018, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112 "2018-04-09T20:28:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2018, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/61 "2018-04-11T20:18:38Z")
> [@Dandan](#): > > Perhaps we could award you a piece of the moon. Moon, my ass! ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2018, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/62 "2018-04-11T22:48:50Z")
You call that a pressed ham? Walt, hit the retaliate button! Oh, let’s see. Any button! They all retaliate! ---
**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/63 "2018-04-12T00:20:25Z")
Getting the moon because I set up the Taint Team topic so Bayard could warn of a Santorum smear. Man, I pegged that correctly. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/64 "2018-04-12T01:19:16Z")
May I have the mineral rights? ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/65 "2018-04-12T02:19:08Z")
FBI raid on President Trump’s lawyer Cohen’s office find’s Obama’s birth certificate. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/66 "2018-04-12T03:12:00Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > FBI raid on President Trump’s lawyer Cohen’s office find’s Obama’s birth certificate. In this day and age, I’m not at all ashamed to admit I had to actually google to make sure this was a joke. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/67 "2018-04-12T12:46:06Z")
Not talking about BatBoy and the moon landing hoaxes. The National Enquirer may be facing allegations of illegal campaign donation to Mr Trump. The NY Times is reporting that may be part of what the search warrant on Cohen was about: that Cohen and the publisher of the Enquirer may have worked together to kill “unfortunate” stories about Trump, to avoid political embarrassment and aid his campaign. If so, buying stories to kill them may qualify as unreported campaign donations. [Investigators Focus on Another Trump Ally: The National Enquirer](https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/11/us/politics/trump-national-enquirer-american-media.html) ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/68 "2018-04-12T13:26:31Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Turns out it was Cohen himself who answered the door at his apartment. I would pay good money for them to release a shot of the expression on his face when he opens the door and sees what looks like the entire FBI staring at him. Something like [this](https://orig00.deviantart.net/c390/f/2015/341/f/0/73634_by_scarecrow113-d9jew67.jpg). Notice Joy is missing. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/69 "2018-04-12T13:29:28Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > In this day and age, I’m not at all ashamed to admit I had to actually google to make sure this was a joke. I’m still not sure if Trump actually is operating with Bill the Cat’s brain. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/70 "2018-04-12T15:31:41Z")
> [@XT](#): > > Why would they be seizing records of Trump’s payout to the porn star? 😕 Because having your lawyer indirectly use campaign funds to pay off a mistress days before an election commits multiple felonies. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/71 "2018-04-12T16:48:01Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#): > > Cohen and the publisher of the Enquirer may have worked together to kill “unfortunate” stories about Trump, to avoid political embarrassment and aid his campaign. The Enquirer could quite plausibly claim in court that nobody would read it for actual news reporting. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/72 "2018-04-12T16:52:56Z")
And there’s a new story floating around: that the Enquirer paid a doorman in New York for exclusive rights to a story that Trump had a love-child with someone who worked for him. But the editor of the Enquirer said they didn’t publish the story, because they couldn’t confirm it and publishing it would be contrary to their journalism ethics. The article I read (can’t find the link) points out that instead, they were publishing articles about Hilary’s numerous lesbian affairs. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/73 "2018-04-12T17:00:08Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > The Enquirer could quite plausibly claim in court that nobody would read it for actual news reporting. That was also my thought. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/74 "2018-04-12T18:35:06Z")
> [@Tzigone](#): > > I think your title could have been a bit more descriptive. > [@Running\_with\_Scissors](#): > > [F.B.I. Raids Office of Trump’s Longtime Lawyer Michael Cohen](https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/09/us/politics/fbi-raids-office-of-trumps-longtime-lawyer-michael-cohen.html?emc=edit_na_20180409&nl=breaking-news&nlid=2330713ing-news&ref=headline) > > I can’t help but feel more than a little schadenfreude. Please use more descriptive thread titles. I have edited the thread title. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/75 "2018-04-12T19:10:16Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > The Enquirer could quite plausibly claim in court that nobody would read it for actual news reporting. I’m going to disagree with the word “plausibly”. They could certainly claim that no one would read it, but it’s not credible. “Trump sleeps with porn star and then pays her off” would certainly grab attention. As would, “Trump has love child”. Then, as now, the media cycle was dominated by all things Trump: what he ate, who he talked to, and this was shortly after the infamous Access Hollywood tape, which would only increase interest in this topic. I’ll also disagree with the premise that anyone reads the National Enquirer for actual news reporting. I’ll let stories like [this one](https://www.nationalenquirer.com/photos/moon-alien-space-station-scientists-bizarre-claim/) make that argument: > [@](#): > > The Moon’s An Alien Space Station’ — Scientists’ Bizarre Claim > Experts say that craters cover an unnatural hollow center! ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/76 "2018-04-12T23:34:47Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#): > > And there’s a new story floating around: that the Enquirer paid a doorman in New York for exclusive rights to a story that Trump had a love-child with someone who worked for him. > > But the editor of the Enquirer said they didn’t publish the story, because they couldn’t confirm it and publishing it would be contrary to their journalism ethics. > > The article I read (can’t find the link) points out that instead, they were publishing articles about Hilary’s numerous lesbian affairs. :rolleyes: Be it noted that the guy who runs the National Enquirer’s name is Pecker. Nuff said. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/77 "2018-04-12T23:36:01Z")
> [@Wesley\_Clark](#): > > Because having your lawyer indirectly use campaign funds to pay off a mistress days before an election commits multiple felonies. If he didn’t use funds from the campaign and did it himself the money becomes campaign funds which were not reported, and ditto. Plus it seems that whatever he told the banks smelled to high heaven, also ditto. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2018, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/78 "2018-04-13T00:23:39Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > The Enquirer could quite plausibly claim in court that nobody would read it for actual news reporting. That won’t fly. Too many successful libel suits against the Enquirer. That demonstrates that people read it and believe its reports are true, ie news. ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2018, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/79 "2018-04-13T00:29:29Z")
Cohen had a habit of taping conversations with associates. > **[Trump’s allies worry that federal investigators may have seized recordings...](https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/trumps-allies-worry-that-federal-investigators-may-have-seized-recordings-made-by-his-attorney/2018/04/12/16d6345a-3e89-11e8-912d-16c9e9b37800_story.html?utm_term=.47ffe6a11f6d)** > > Lawyer Michael D. Cohen occasionally taped conversations with associates, according to people familiar with his practice. Ruh-roh! ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2018, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112/80 "2018-04-13T00:56:33Z")
> [@Bayard](#): > > Cohen had a habit of taping conversations with associates. > > [https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/trumps-allies-worry-that-federal-investigators-may-have-seized-recordings-made-by-his-attorney/2018/04/12/16d6345a-3e89-11e8-912d-16c9e9b37800\_story.html?utm\_term=.47ffe6a11f6d](https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/trumps-allies-worry-that-federal-investigators-may-have-seized-recordings-made-by-his-attorney/2018/04/12/16d6345a-3e89-11e8-912d-16c9e9b37800_story.html?utm_term=.47ffe6a11f6d) > > Ruh-roh! _The Washington Post_ is going to release the tapes, isn’t it? I mean, it’s going to release tapes of a sitting President doing shady shit while the conversation was being recorded. Stupid Nixon just shouldn’t _be_ this Nixonian. It’s practically a Seltzer and Friedberg movie. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-just-got-real-fbi-raids-trump-lawyer/812112.md?page=5)