# Shit on the floor, shit on the toilet seat, shit on the walls, it's like a real shitstorm! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 19, 2015, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952 "2015-06-19T15:58:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2015, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/41 "2015-06-22T21:30:01Z")
> [@JcWoman](#): > > I’m oddly glad of this thread. Way back, when I worked in fast food during college, I had to clean the bathrooms and found this exact scenario once. It was pretty disgusting. I assumed it was kids because I can’t imagine any adult acting like a monkey throwing feces around like that. (Just remembered this) When I was in college, I was a hotel banquet server, and one night, my roommate and I were on the late shift at a wedding reception…and someone had expelled mass quantities out both ends at the same time. :eek: Even worse, it smelled of alcohol (which explained a lot) and the culprit turned out to be a tween girl who was running around drinking out of glasses that had been left on tables (which is one reason why the wait staff collects them if you walk away from them). Both of us said we would quit before cleaning that up, and the dishwashers, who were young men, said, “Oh, we both worked at McDonald’s before this, and had to deal with this all the time.” Sure enough, they put on long gloves and got out the proper cleaners, and cleaned that up without batting an eye. :o One of our friends said, “Her parents should have tossed her into the back of a pickup truck, and run her through a carwash!” 😛 And let’s just say that another person to whom I told this story said, “Chances are, it was NOT the first time she had done this.” As for poop being expelled everywhere, it just occurred to me that someone might have a faulty colostomy. 😕 Anyone here have any experience with those? ---
**Author:** ![Plumpudding](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Plumpudding](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plumpudding)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2015, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/42 "2015-06-23T13:45:15Z")
I worked for several years at a camp site and I had to, among other things, clean the toilets. People disgust me. ---
**Author:** ![Bam\_Boo\_Gut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8c91f0/32.png) [@Bam\_Boo\_Gut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bam_Boo_Gut)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2015, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/43 "2015-06-24T02:35:54Z")
The manager told me he’d been cleaning up the bathroom, it happened several times, someone was smearing shit on the walls of the mens toilets. He thought someone had it in for him and he felt he couldn’t ask the cleaner to clean it up. Turns out one of the workers had had an affair with the cleaner and was now … getting back at her - well that backfired buddy. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2015, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/44 "2015-06-24T02:47:32Z")
> [@Bam\_Boo\_Gut](#): > > The manager told me he’d been cleaning up the bathroom, it happened several times, someone was smearing shit on the walls of the mens toilets. He thought someone had it in for him and he felt he couldn’t ask the cleaner to clean it up. Turns out one of the workers had had an affair with the cleaner and was now … getting back at her - well that backfired buddy. Huh huh, you said “backfire”. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2015, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/45 "2015-06-24T04:11:09Z")
> [@Bam\_Boo\_Gut](#): > > backfired Bravo for the double pun!😃 ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2015, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/46 "2015-06-24T15:52:40Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > I once went back to use a grocery store bathroom. A guy who had obviously just come out of the Men’s but was far enough from it to apparently feel safe gave me a crazy-ass grin and said, “Wow, it’s kind of a mess in there.” He was gone by the time I opened the door to see a six-foot rope of shit laid across the whole stall, toilet, adjacent urinal, TP dispenser, etc. > > I have no idea how he did it, and don’t want to. But… yeah. I’ll take “Things that did not happen” for $400, Alex. ---
**Author:** ![CoastalMaineiac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@CoastalMaineiac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CoastalMaineiac)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2015, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/47 "2015-06-24T16:02:35Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > At least once every month or so some embarrassed person comes to quietly let me know that somebody has again taken a shit in the library urinal. > > It’s very funny, how they decide to tell me that they have encountered another person’s feces in an unexpected way. One dude just yelled on his way to the escalator “Hey somebody shit in your urinal!” Another one sort of sidled up and whispered and all I heard was “defecated”. Maybe one of those was it? But which one? You just reminded me of a Reddit post I once read about shitting in urinals… now I’ll have to go find it. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2015, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/48 "2015-06-25T00:26:07Z")
I was in the ER with my mother once. This was before our hospital remodeled and a number of the stations were seperated only by pull-along curtains. In a nearby station a nurse must have walked in on a guy waiting. I heard her start hollering “Where do you think you are you stupid @#$%^&\*?” I heard him giggling. Later I overheard that the dude was high and used the sink in the ER station to pee in. The nurse, according to regs, had to call in a bio-hazards team to clean up. ---
**Author:** ![russian\_heel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f05b48/32.png) [@russian\_heel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/russian_heel)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2015, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/49 "2015-06-25T05:12:53Z")
Page one of this blog may offer some insight: > **[We Find Corpses: 5 Weird Truths Of Cleaning Porta Johns](https://www.cracked.com/personal-experiences-1724-we-find-corpses-5-weird-truths-cleaning-porta-johns.html)** > > We talked to a guy who, every day, is elbow-deep -- sometimes quite literally -- in all your dirty little secrets, and he had amazing things to say. ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2015, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/50 "2015-06-25T09:30:34Z")
Reminds me of my stint as a motel maid. People can be truly disgusting if they’re somewhere they don’t have to clean up after themselves. Most pets I’ve had are cleaner than some of the “humans” mentioned in this thread, or that I had to clean up after during the aforementioned job. ---
**Author:** ![Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce7236/32.png) [@Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mona_Lisa_Simpson)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2015, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/51 "2015-06-25T19:51:33Z")
When my boyfriend used to produce shows with bands at the local bars we had one band beg us for a show date. We told them there would be no audience that night. We didn’t want them. We agreed to door deal plus they could crash at our house. There were three people in the place. We spent 25 bucks getting posters made and the door draw was 15 dollars. We gave them the 15, fed them after the show and let them sleep at our place. The next morning I woke to find a walnut sized perfectly round shit ball on my toilet seat. It looked very Zen. ---
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2015, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/52 "2015-06-25T22:29:19Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > At least once every month or so some embarrassed person comes to quietly let me know that somebody has again taken a shit in the library urinal. > > It’s very funny, how they decide to tell me that they have encountered another person’s feces in an unexpected way. One dude just yelled on his way to the escalator “Hey somebody shit in your urinal!” Another one sort of sidled up and whispered and all I heard was “defecated”. Maybe one of those was it? But which one? The “Mad Crapper” strikes again! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2015, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/53 "2015-06-26T00:12:40Z")
The one described to me at a Kroger employee restroom was done on purpose. This forum requires that you wait 60 seconds between posts. Please try again in 2 seconds. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2015, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/54 "2015-06-26T19:10:35Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > Two words: [prehensile rectum](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=80957). > > (ETA: Do not miss Post #27 of that thread.) Post #27 there has to be the best confluence of post to poster name I’ve seen here in a long time. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2015, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shit-on-the-floor-shit-on-the-toilet-seat-shit-on-the-walls-its-like-a-real-shitstorm/722952/55 "2015-08-19T21:42:50Z")
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