# Shitty, annoying commercials that annoy the hell out of you **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 7, 2006, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812 "2006-05-07T22:37:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/101 "2006-05-10T00:17:10Z")
Ooh, I just thought of one that will make me turn the channel, and I am not too picky about getting back for the next segment. The Burger King commercial where the King is digitally inserted into sports highlight reels. Also, the commercial for some other goddamn thing where they alter the highlight reel so that Michael Jordan misses the shot, or Dwight Clark drops the ball. Just remembering them pisses me off. ---
**Author:** ![ryobserver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b2d939/32.png) [@ryobserver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ryobserver)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/102 "2006-05-10T01:08:05Z")
The Mega M&Ms ads. A stupid product idea to start with, stupidly executed, but the ads are stupider still. It’s an escalating festival of stupid. My most-hated ad ever seems to be off the air now, but it only seemed to air on weekday morning TV, which I haven’t watched in ages, so I could be wrong. It was the Senokot (laxative) ad using James Brown’s “I Feel Good” over film of a bike rider popping a wheelie, a grocer juggling fruit, people dancing, various other happy people doing happy things, all really happy because, presumably, they’d taken Senokot and had a good shit. I have instructed my friends that if they ever see me act THAT happy about taking a dump, they are to have me humanely killed. ---
**Author:** ![singular1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ba9def/32.png) [@singular1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/singular1)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/103 "2006-05-10T11:26:35Z")
[QUOTE=vivalostwages] The bathroom tissue commercial that’s animated, with happy bears crouching behind trees and enjoying the softness of whatever the product is called. Yeck. Does a bear shit in the woods? Hell yes, and it even uses toilet paper. [/QUOTE] And this is why I quit buying Charmin. Used to be I’d pay whatever it cost, since I liked the product. But not after seeing those goddam bears. Now I look for the lab puppy or the old women quilting. ('cause store brand still sucks) ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/104 "2006-05-10T13:46:10Z")
[QUOTE=ryobserver] The Mega M&Ms ads. A stupid product idea to start with, stupidly executed, but the ads are stupider still. It’s an escalating festival of stupid. My most-hated ad ever seems to be off the air now, but it only seemed to air on weekday morning TV, which I haven’t watched in ages, so I could be wrong. It was the Senokot (laxative) ad using James Brown’s “I Feel Good” over film of a bike rider popping a wheelie, a grocer juggling fruit, people dancing, various other happy people doing happy things, all really happy because, presumably, they’d taken Senokot and had a good shit. I have instructed my friends that if they ever see me act THAT happy about taking a dump, they are to have me humanely killed. [/QUOTE] Yeah, and how about those Dulcolax ads for (man, I hate even typing this) stool softener? “It doesn’t _make_ you go, it makes it more _comfortable_ to go!” Yuck_ola_. And I must add my loathing for the Mars candy bar commercial (with the girl popping from the wrapper). Really every part of the ad annoys me, but the worst for me is when the guy says, “What-EV.” Oh, hell, now we can’t even say a whole word like “whatever?” And his forced laughter just makes me want to punch him in the nards. As for that horrid “beard Skittles” ad, all I could do when I first saw it was gape in horror. Pediasure–hey, Mom, instead of jumping through hoops trying to find some food that the picky eater from hell (“I don’t _like_ chicken!” “I don’t _like_ broccoli!” “I don’t think I like waffles!”) will condescend to consume and then buying that flavored oil for her, how about letting her get hungry enough so that she’d eat chopped chicken feathers. You know, missing a meal or two won’t kill her, and might actually cure that smarmy tone in her voice!! ---
**Author:** ![sciurophobic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@sciurophobic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sciurophobic)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/105 "2006-05-10T14:15:55Z")
That annoying spokesdork for Outback Steakhouse. Not good. Not good. ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/106 "2006-05-10T18:53:50Z")
For years, I’ve watched Bud Light ads, and I came to the conclusion that I’m just not sneaky/stupid/dishonest/desperate enough to drink Bud Light. The new Bud Light Daredevil, though takes the cake. Aaaaaaarrrrgh. ---
**Author:** ![Airblairxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Airblairxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airblairxxx)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/107 "2006-05-10T18:58:29Z")
[QUOTE=Godfrey Daniels] Radio commercials for TV shows. I writhe in disgust everytime I hear that group of 30(or whatever)-somethings discussing in conversational tones the latest episode of “Scrubs”. [/QUOTE] Damn you, you brought that up before I could. It is NBC that is doing it, and their strategy is to emulate a morning drive-time “zoo crew”, talking about shows they love in an insanely upbeat, perky way. What’s irritating is that my local morning DJ of choice, Dave Morey of KFOG, is one of the most mellow, laid back voices you’ll ever hear, AND THAT IS WHY I CHOOSE TO LISTEN TO HIM. But the commercial will start off with a number of different voices all talking over each other: –And, we’re back! –We are! –Ohmigod, did you guys see that show on NBC, “[insert show here]”? I LOVE THAT SHOW! –Last week’s episode was hilarious!! I’d quote more, but it takes me about 1.2 seconds to turn off the radio, so that’s about all I usually hear. ---
**Author:** ![aktep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f0a364/32.png) [@aktep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aktep)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/108 "2006-05-10T19:26:41Z")
[QUOTE=saoirse] Also, the commercial for some other goddamn thing where they alter the highlight reel so that Michael Jordan misses the shot, or Dwight Clark drops the ball. Just remembering them pisses me off. [/QUOTE] Aw, but I like that one. For just a few seconds, I get to pretend like the 49ers lost that game and Dallas went on to yet another Super Bowl. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/109 "2006-05-10T19:28:27Z")
[QUOTE=sciurophobic] That annoying spokesdork for Outback Steakhouse. Not good. Not good. [/QUOTE] Oooh, good one. I’d forgotten about the rather dense chap with the “I Live in The City” glasses on. He needs to have a dead Kookaburra mashed down his throat. ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2006, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/110 "2006-05-10T21:15:23Z")
[QUOTE=amarinth] Which sort of leads to the DeBeers “I’d marry you all over again” commercial. Why is she skeptical about this claim? Why “yeah, right.”? Why wouldn’t her husband (who she’s having fun vacationing with) want to marry her? What is wrong with this woman? And why should I want to be like her? [/QUOTE] You may have seen the short version of that commercial. IIRC, the longer version has the man saying he’d marry her all over again, right at that moment, and she says in a coy tone, “Yeah, right, in front of all these people?” or something to that effect. I got the impression that she was saying that he was shy about expressing his affection in public (which anyone knows can be easily accomplished by buying her a flashy ring.) I haven’t seen them in a long time, but commercials for birth control pills used to really irk me. The producers took great pains to show that the woman in the commercial was married with five-second closeups of her wedding ring, or wedding photos. One of them stressed that the woman was merely \*delaying \* having a baby until the time was right. I guess they didn’t want viewers to think that women who use their products might be single sluts who don’t ever want kids. ---
**Author:** ![Fionn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Fionn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fionn)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2006, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/111 "2006-05-11T01:40:02Z")
I roll my eyes every time a radio commercial for “Austin’s hottest new club, (insert name) is here…” DJs, lounge, dress to impress, yadda yadda yadda. I just want to scream at the cheesy announcer, the script writer and for good measure the owner that good clubs don’t need to advertise. The specific name escapes me, but there’s a commercial for speciality yogurt that features one roommate asking another if she’s ready go. The roommate says no-she’s bloated and irregular and therefore can’t actually leave the house. The first roommate talks about the bacteria-fortified yogurt she eats every day to stay regular. Who the hell does that? ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2006, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/112 "2006-05-11T02:12:55Z")
[QUOTE=Fionn] The specific name escapes me, but there’s a commercial for speciality yogurt that features one roommate asking another if she’s ready go. The roommate says no-she’s bloated and irregular and therefore can’t actually leave the house. The first roommate talks about the bacteria-fortified yogurt she eats every day to stay regular. Who the hell does that? [/QUOTE] A roomate concerned with their friend’s healthy bowels, that’s who. You know the saying: “A friend will help you move a couch. A \*\*best \*\* friend will help you move your bowels,” or something to that effect. 😉 Once, my mom and I were in her kitchen chopping up vegetables. Suddenly, an impluse took control of me and I said, deadpan, “Mom, do you ever get that _not-so-fresh_ feeling?” She stared at me for a moment, and then laughed so hard she choked. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2006, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/114 "2006-05-11T04:59:42Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] For years, I’ve watched Bud Light ads, and I came to the conclusion that I’m just not sneaky/stupid/dishonest/desperate enough to drink Bud Light. The new Bud Light Daredevil, though takes the cake. Aaaaaaarrrrgh. [/QUOTE] I just saw a new Bud Light commercial that I laughed my butt off at. A group went to a Japanese restaurant and they told the big macho guy that if he ate the SomethingOrOther Surprise his whole table would get free Bud Light. He says it sounds like a great deal and how bad can that be? They bring him normal looking sushi then some Alien-like face-hugger thing leaps out and attaches to his face while the waitresses all yell “Surprise!”. Later, with the thing still attached to his face, he says “it tastes funny” and the waitress smiles sweetly and says “it lay eggs now”. My new entry for annoying commercial is a Wendy’s Frosty commercial with two stoner/geeks discussing their frosty’s and saying it’s not a solid or liquid so it must be a “soquid” and it’s going to change their lives! Then skinny stoner geek says the real money lies in the “Foon”, the Frosty Spoon. Which is just a regular plastic spoon, maybe just slightly longer. C’mon, it’s just a really thick chocolate milkshake (that may or may not contain any dairy products). it is not live changing. Besides, everyone knows the spork is where the money lies. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2006, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/115 "2006-05-11T05:47:12Z")
KMart has a new, truly shitty ad out right now for Mother’s Day sales, featuring a little boy sitting on a toilet (partially obscured, but you know he’s there), and then he yells out, “Mooooom! I’m dooooone!” For cripesake. ---
**Author:** ![Achren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/898d66/32.png) [@Achren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achren)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2006, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/116 "2006-05-11T05:55:49Z")
There’s this Bounty commercial that they showed before the movie started at our theater a few times. Think 70’s BDSM gay porn, but with Bounty…and icing. ---
**Author:** ![robotic\_panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed8c4c/32.png) [@robotic\_panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robotic_panda)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2006, 11:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/117 "2006-05-11T11:06:05Z")
[QUOTE=wolfman] My new most hated comercial is for Three Musketeers I think. A loser guy has a really bad date, then goes back to his car, where he opens the candybar. Then his candy bar turns into a chick and starts talking to him like a Saigon whore before he bites into it right where her head was. It’s just so damn creepy and wrong. [/QUOTE] That’d be Milky Way… and I know because it is my SO’s new quote. “Why so blue, panda bear?” And he says it in that accent. It makes me crack up every time. I think the current crop of anti-marijuana commercials is especially stupid. It either shows CGI kids all squashed or distorted (to show visibly the supposed mental effects of smoking), or it shows kids shoving fists in their mouths or running from vicious dogs in a junkyard or other general stupidity. The message is, “First they asked me to smoke pot. Then they asked me to outrun a rabid dog/shove my fist in my mouth/sodomize a bull with a railroad spike and a ball-peen hammer! SO I SAID OK!” There must be some sort of plan to make anti-drug ads as stupid as possible. “Only dopes smoke dope… thats what my dad said! But he was drunk at the time…” (Kids in the Hall) ---
**Author:** ![aktep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f0a364/32.png) [@aktep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aktep)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2006, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/118 "2006-05-11T14:00:53Z")
[QUOTE=Fionn] I roll my eyes every time a radio commercial for “Austin’s hottest new club, (insert name) is here…” DJs, lounge, dress to impress, yadda yadda yadda. I just want to scream at the cheesy announcer, the script writer and for good measure the owner that good clubs don’t need to advertise. [/QUOTE] Also, if you’re going to advertise for anything in Austin, make sure your voice talent can pronounce “Burnet” and “Koenig” correctly (especially when your business is on one of those streets), so you don’t sound like you just came in from California. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2006, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/119 "2006-05-11T15:20:40Z")
[QUOTE=Wile E] Still, it’s only slightly less annoying than the commercial that played “my humps”, my humps, my humps, my humps! I have to pretend it’s being sung by a camel. [/QUOTE] Come on - the way that girl throws her humps and her lumps around during the commercial is quite…appetising. -Joe, appetiting ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2006, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/120 "2006-05-12T00:59:41Z")
[QUOTE=Merijeek] Come on - the way that girl throws her humps and her lumps around during the commercial is quite…appetising. -Joe, appetiting [/QUOTE] The moniker can be misleading. This Wile E is a straight female and that chick just doesn’t make my “If I Were A Lesbian”\* list. - _As performed by Zero Mostel_. “If I were a Lesbian, yadda badda beeda deedle dum. All day long I biddy biddy bum, if I were a Les- bee - uhnn!” ---
**Author:** ![Caractacus\_Pott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@Caractacus\_Pott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caractacus_Pott)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2006, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812/121 "2006-05-12T05:08:21Z")
Oh, I got a few. There’s some for a mobile phone company. I don’t think they do business here. Anyway, they show some famous person as a kid not using the product and turning out as a nerd instead of famous person. It closes with “unlimited chirp.” WTF is a chirp? I’m pretty sure I don’t want it. The feminine hygiene products commercials where women dance frenetically with high leg-kicks? I asked an OB/GYN about that. Apparently they’re taking liberties with the truth. I’m deciding whether this poorly-produced local commercial is annoying or if it’s just pathetic. She’s monotonously whining on the phone to a friend because she has no money to get fixed up to go partying tonight. Before the hysterical blindness kicked in, I saw she’s, putting it politely, hideous. Or is it repulsive? Her friend must have convinced her to hock her next paycheck to go to the nail salon and hairdresser. [Editorial Note: Donald Trump’s next paycheck isn’t enough for this gal.] It ends with 45-degree rotated long shot of her dancing with people to _Don’t Stop Til You Get Enough_ in a darkened office. Oddly there is no close up shot of her at the party. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shitty-annoying-commercials-that-annoy-the-hell-out-of-you/355812.md?page=7)