# Should a bridemaid wear beige? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 16, 2007, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050 "2007-07-16T23:34:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/41 "2007-07-17T18:11:41Z")
[QUOTE=Jodi] No, the bridesmaid said quite clearly that the dress was beige, which it is. We can quibble over that, but it doesn’t change my point, which is that if she had cared that much about color she should have assigned them the color. When you leave it up to your bridesmaids to exercise their own taste and judgment in what they will wear – which I think is a lovely idea – you do kind of take your chances with what they will decide on. [/QUOTE] I certainly don’t mean to “quibble”, but: “I told them they could choose their own dresses, **but I get to veto if I don’t like it** …she showed me the fabrics she chose, which included a sort of toile print in pink and green over a beige background for the skirt. I thought it would be ok since the top of the dress was to be pink. …Well, last night she showed me the dress. It is made entirely out of the beige fabric. There is no pink fabric whatsoever…But the dress looks quite different than the dress she originally intended and that I OK’d.” She didn’t leave it completely up to them; she reserved veto power and OKed one design. If I were a bridesmaid and discussed one thing, I would feel bad changing it (during a time I know would be stressful for the bride) and certainly at least let her know. This is assuming there was no miscommunication during the initial conversation. ---
**Author:** ![sugar\_and\_spice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e8c25b/32.png) [@sugar\_and\_spice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sugar_and_spice)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/42 "2007-07-17T19:30:39Z")
[QUOTE=lieu] An appreciable percentage of the men in the audience won’t even have a clue that this is in any way, shape or form a problem. Heck, it took about half the thread before I was positive on exactly what the fuss was about. Oh, and **sugar and spice** , I _love_ that picture! How would you describe that color? Ash? [/QUOTE] Hard to say, my monitor isn’t color-calibrated, but I think ash is a good guess. To bad they don’t label the pictures with dress info! [Watters](http://www.watters.com/product.php?coll=watters&showid=298&style=5299) (a better BM dress maker) has a Candlelight that’s close, they seem to have about five different shades that Very Pale color that I see all the time now. ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/43 "2007-07-17T19:47:54Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] I certainly don’t mean to “quibble”, but: [/quote] And yet, you do. I don’t know if you actually disagree with me, or if you’re just engaging in the gratuitous correcting and nitpicking that so frequently passes for sport around here. If you disagreed with me, you should have said so. If it’s just the nitpicking, go nuts, but forgive me if I don’t join you. **Ghamina** , good job getting your perspective back. Have a lovely wedding. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/44 "2007-07-17T20:03:54Z")
[QUOTE=sugar and spice] Hard to say, my monitor isn’t color-calibrated, but I think ash is a good guess. [/QUOTE] You adorable person… I’m sorry, I was talking about all the smokers. They cracked me right up. > [@](#): > > **Ghamina** , good job getting your perspective back. Have a lovely wedding. 🙂 Ditto! ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/45 "2007-07-17T20:10:09Z")
[QUOTE=Jodi] And yet, you do. I don’t know if you actually disagree with me, or if you’re just engaging in the gratuitous correcting and nitpicking that so frequently passes for sport around here. If you disagreed with me, you should have said so. If it’s just the nitpicking, go nuts, but forgive me if I don’t join you. [/QUOTE] I didn’t think I was quibbling, hence the quotes. I know it’s not the end of the world, but I did think I was making a valid point\* and not just arguing for its own sake. \*To wit, Bride said propose a dress, but I get to say no. Bridesmaid proposes dress, bride agrees. Bridesmaid changes dress without telling bride. Bride is (justifiably IMHO) upset. Truly, I’m sorry if I came across as rude. ---
**Author:** ![sugar\_and\_spice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e8c25b/32.png) [@sugar\_and\_spice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sugar_and_spice)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/46 "2007-07-17T20:11:53Z")
[QUOTE=lieu] You adorable person… I’m sorry, I was talking about all the smokers. They cracked me right up. [/QUOTE] 😊 ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/47 "2007-07-17T20:11:54Z")
[QUOTE=Ghanima] I called her last night and apologized, told her the dress was going to be fine, that I was totally over it, and everything was OK. [/QUOTE] Good for you! You’re going to have an awesome day! ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/48 "2007-07-17T20:31:10Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] I didn’t think I was quibbling, hence the quotes. I know it’s not the end of the world, but I did think I was making a valid point\* and not just arguing for its own sake. [/quote] I really don’t want to beat this to death, and I appreciate the apology, which truly wasn’t necessary. But if your point was that IYO **Ghamina** was justified in being upset, and that you disagreed with my opinion, you could have just said so without nitpicking my post (I said “she left it up to her,” you say “she didn’t _quite_ leave it up to her”) as if my analysis was fundamentally incorrect, which, IMO it wasn’t. Yes, you used quotes, but I don’t think that quoting the language one chooses to laser in on (at the expense of the larger point being made) exempts one from a charge of nitpicking. I’m honestly not picking on you – I _like_ you – but I have really noticed an increase in the already high prevalence at hyper-correction around here, and it’s starting to piss me off. (I made a spelling error in a thread recently, and no fewer than three posters dropped in to point it out to me, not one of whom addressed the point I was making, and two of whom were so eager to register their correction they couldn’t even read the other responses first in order to see that the correction had _already_ been made.) But I think perhaps that irritation caused me to jump on you unfairly, and for that I do apologize. The difference is that your apology wasn’t necessary but upon review, mine is. Pax? ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/49 "2007-07-17T20:32:32Z")
And well after the wedding, the lady looked up and said to herself: “Beige, I think I’ll paint the ceiling beige.” ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/50 "2007-07-17T20:37:29Z")
[QUOTE=Jodi] The difference is that your apology wasn’t necessary but upon review, mine is. [/QUOTE] Comma fault, comma fault; Jodi made a comma fault! 😛 (And Muffin runs like hell out of this thread, knowing that he does not have long to live.) ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/51 "2007-07-17T20:44:49Z")
[QUOTE=Jodi] Pax? [/QUOTE] Of course! I know you are always very precise in your analysis and I didn’t mean to imply that you were incorrect. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2007, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/52 "2007-07-17T20:54:52Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] Of course! I know you are always very precise in your analysis and I didn’t mean to imply that you were incorrect. :smack: [/QUOTE] Oh, _please_. Imply away. I see I was quite far up on my high horse there; I’ve recovered. Note how I’m ignoring **Muffin** , who will get his later and when he least expects it. [sub]muh-wahahahaha[/sub] Sorry for the hijack, everyone. Have a blessed wedding, **Ghamina**. Please post pictures, not of the bridesmaids but of the bride. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2007, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/53 "2007-07-18T05:19:42Z")
Good for you, **Ghanima**. As Dr. Phil says, do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy? ---
**Author:** ![thirdwarning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecccb3/32.png) [@thirdwarning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdwarning)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2007, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/54 "2007-07-18T07:05:54Z")
Something tells me it will be beautiful wedding, and an even better marriage. Blessings. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050/55 "2007-07-20T16:08:50Z")
You will post updates after the big day, I hope? I know you’ll be busy, but priorities, girl. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-a-bridemaid-wear-beige/412050.md?page=2)