# Should I buy a lion? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 10, 2013, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727 "2013-01-10T07:28:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2013, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/41 "2013-01-13T21:46:20Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > The puns are getting weaker. This thread is becoming a cat-astrophe. Oh, don’t have kittens about it. ---
**Author:** ![Precambrianmollusc](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/precambrianmollusc/32/63_2.png) [@Precambrianmollusc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Precambrianmollusc)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/42 "2013-01-14T06:12:42Z")
> [@EmilyG](#): > > Oh, don’t have kittens about it. That was paw ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/43 "2013-01-14T06:28:03Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > The puns are getting weaker. This thread is becoming a cat-astrophe. But they remain protected speech under the Constitution. Haven’t you read the Dew Process Claws? ---
**Author:** ![Floater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/dc4da7/32.png) [@Floater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Floater)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 10:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/44 "2013-01-14T10:45:39Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > The puns are getting weaker. This thread is becoming a cat-astrophe. I don’t care. I’m just reading between the lions anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/45 "2013-01-14T14:48:13Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > But they remain protected speech under the Constitution. Haven’t you read the Dew Process Claws? Ugh. Just dreadful. Most members of the SDMB can be severe critics, so even long time dopers should not be surprised when we pan-ther awful cat puns. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/46 "2013-01-14T16:37:11Z")
Hey, I think these puns are purrfect. They’re the cat’s pajamas. ---
**Author:** ![gytalf2000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ac91a4/32.png) [@gytalf2000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gytalf2000)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/47 "2013-01-14T18:03:32Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > No. [Get a gorilla](http://www.theonion.com/articles/gorilla-sales-skyrocket-after-latest-gorilla-attac,30860/). It is your right as an American. Hilarious! Gotta love the Onion. ---
**Author:** ![alindallas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f17d59/32.png) [@alindallas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alindallas)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2013, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/48 "2013-01-16T23:45:19Z")
The lion’s share of these jokes are quite funny, although a few are real dogs. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/49 "2013-01-17T12:49:18Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > No. [Get a gorilla](http://www.theonion.com/articles/gorilla-sales-skyrocket-after-latest-gorilla-attac,30860/). It is your right as an American. You’re confused, **njtt** , you have a right to bear arms, not gorillas. It’s not clear whether they have to be transplanted\* or you can just have a box of bear arms lying around. Or what you do with the rest of the bear. \*Think how cool that would be! You’d never need a can opener again. ---
**Author:** ![MacLir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9e8a1a/32.png) [@MacLir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacLir)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/50 "2013-01-17T16:09:11Z")
> [@Skara\_Brae](#): > > From the article: > Is anyone else rather curious as to how this conversation went? I mean was it more "Zookeeper, I need a bed check on all your \*Felis leos \*ASAP! > > Or “Hey, Phil, this is Officer Smith from the NPD…I, uh…I need you to count the lions for me again…Sure, I’ll hold.” If the keeper is quick, he could respond “All the _Felis leo_ specimens are gone! There’s not one in the cages!”:eek: _Felis leo_ has been a disused binomial for over fifty years. Generally speaking, big cats that roar and have round pupils are genus _Panthera_. _Felis_ cats are smaller, have slit pupils and a complete hyoid bone which will not allow them to roar. This is why your back fence doesn’t sound like the Serengeti. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/51 "2013-01-17T17:34:07Z")
You should get a lion or a tiger. But you need to get the one that will win in a fight with each other. If only there was a way we could know who would win… ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/52 "2013-01-17T21:27:13Z")
> [@alindallas](#): > > The lion’s share of these jokes are quite funny, although a few are real dogs. The mane thing is they’re at least trying. ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/53 "2013-01-18T02:53:08Z")
> [@TBG](#): > > The mane thing is they’re at least trying. Yes, we should encougarage the development of thematic punning skills. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/54 "2013-01-18T02:58:08Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > You should get a lion or a tiger. But you need to get the one that will win in a fight with each other. If only there was a way we could know who would win… Makes sure neither one has spots. That one won’t fight fair, it’s probably a cheetah… ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/55 "2013-01-18T03:01:57Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Makes sure neither one has spots. That one won’t fight fair, it’s probably a cheetah… True indeed. And we should all remember that it is not whether you win or leos, but how you play the game. ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/56 "2013-01-18T03:06:41Z")
> [@MacLir](#): > > If the keeper is quick, he could respond “All the _Felis leo_ specimens are gone! There’s not one in the cages!”:eek: > _Felis leo_ has been a disused binomial for over fifty years. Generally speaking, big cats that roar and have round pupils are genus _Panthera_. _Felis_ cats are smaller, have slit pupils and\*\* a complete hyoid bone which will not allow them to roar.\*\* > This is why your back fence doesn’t sound like the Serengeti. So can you buy a tabby cat and have surgery done on that bone?🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/57 "2013-01-18T03:09:07Z")
> [@stui\_magpie](#): > > So can you buy a tabby cat and have surgery done on that bone?🙂 Even if you could, you really shouldn’t. That would be buh-buh-bad to the bone. ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/58 "2013-01-18T03:25:40Z")
> [@stui\_magpie](#): > > So can you buy a tabby cat and have surgery done on that bone?🙂 Surgery on a tabby is one thing, but surgery on a wild predatory cat is much more difficult. Even if the animal is sedated, the veterinarian must be very [caracal](http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://cdn2.arkive.org/media/E5/E5C3ED25-5323-4581-A66B-CA9F253B5BCD/Presentation.Large/Caracal-cub.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.arkive.org/caracal/caracal-caracal/&h=422&w=650&sz=49&tbnid=sK2xMbJYRKL2ZM:&tbnh=80&tbnw=123&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dcaracal%26tbm%3Disch%26tbo%3Du&zoom=1&q=caracal&usg=__TUprnZto5IKw8bh7dUMvkQofRgY=&docid=KYPEezj6x38TfM&hl=en&sa=X&ei=2b_4UPaCMYbh0wHExoCYBA&sqi=2&ved=0CIkBEP4dMA0) not to make a mistake. ---
**Author:** ![Largo62](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/45deac/32.png) [@Largo62](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Largo62)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2013, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/59 "2013-01-19T01:51:06Z")
Big cats are beautiful (I especially like tigers), but they are definitely not pets. Even if you could buy one, there is almost no home site where you could legally keep it anyway. Do you have a compound in the country? Maybe then. You do realize, don’t you, that there is no such thing as a tame lion. ---
**Author:** ![shijinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@shijinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shijinn)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2013, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727/60 "2013-01-19T02:23:53Z")
how dare you, Charles the Monarch would never hurt anybody! he’s as friendly as your average dog. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-buy-a-lion/646727.md?page=4)