# Should I complain that I was basically called a slut? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 7, 2016, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711 "2016-06-07T03:06:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Me\_Billy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e480ec/32.png) [@Me\_Billy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Me_Billy)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/21 "2016-06-07T15:06:26Z")
Get a lawyer and sue for defamation of character. People like this need to learn there are consequences for their actions - her parents apparently did not teach her, so now you can! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/22 "2016-06-07T15:10:08Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Given that you were able to prove that you aren’t a slut, via the CC showing that the door was open, I don’t think you need to do anything. how did that observation prove anything? ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/23 "2016-06-07T17:53:00Z")
It proves the door was open, which formed the entire basis for the alleged allegation that she was a slut. If the door wasn’t shut, she’s not a slut. Regards, Johnny Cochrane ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/24 "2016-06-07T18:04:35Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > It proves the door was open, which formed the entire basis for the alleged allegation that she was a slut. > > If the door wasn’t shut, she’s not a slut. > > Regards, > Johnny Cochrane On the other hand, the snitch intended some kind of smear by lying about the door being shut. It’s not a stretch to conclude that was to imply there was indecent behavior taking place behind closed doors; what else would be inhibited by requiring open doors? ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/25 "2016-06-07T18:50:08Z")
Yes, that was the implication, and was based on the idea that the door was closed. Which it wasn’t. So the implication has no basis. QED. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/26 "2016-06-07T19:02:05Z")
> [@Klquestions](#): > > So this employee basically called me a slut, insinuating that I would sleep with my boyfriend in his office during the day with employees everywhere. That is not an insulation that you are a slut. It is an insunation that your boyfriend has poor workplace habits. Not the same thing. He can sleep by himself in the office, no sluts involved, still a bad workplace habit. He can sleep with you in many places, and being a slut is not insinuated nor dis-insinuated by any of them, with the possible exception of blatant exhibitionism with forethought for its shock value. In these times of relatively relaxed sexual mores among consenting adults, why does the word “slut” still get splashed around so much? ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/27 "2016-06-07T19:12:53Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Yes, that was the implication, and was based on the idea that the door was closed. Which it wasn’t. So the implication has no basis. QED. > > Regards, > Shodan Of course it has no basis. Insults rarely do. The intent was to slur, even if it was a lie. ---
**Author:** ![Emiliana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@Emiliana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emiliana)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/28 "2016-06-07T19:14:27Z")
This is what happens in a larger city with a small city feel. Move to a small city that feels like a megalopolis. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/29 "2016-06-07T19:27:30Z")
Do the managers in this hotel think they are dorm matrons from 1962 or something? Since when is closing a door unprofessional? Even with a member of the opposite sex in the room? In a hotel with no doubt many empty rooms, with beds, someone wishing to mess around could do better than an office. Maybe he should look for a job in a place which assumes him to be professional, and adult, until proven otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/30 "2016-06-07T19:33:49Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > Do the managers in this hotel think they are dorm matrons from 1962 or something? > Since when is closing a door unprofessional? Even with a member of the opposite sex in the room? In a hotel with no doubt many empty rooms, with beds, someone wishing to mess around could do better than an office. > Maybe he should look for a job in a place which assumes him to be professional, and adult, until proven otherwise. My guess is the OP was a little skimpy on details, and the other employee didn’t simply say the door was shut. She probably said the door was shut and implied or stated overtly that something unprofessional was going on in the office. I seriously doubt the manager would get wigged out simply for a shut door, unless there is some backstory we aren’t being told. ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/31 "2016-06-07T19:54:31Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > My guess is the OP was a little skimpy on details, … Like being completely naked while sitting on the bench? ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/32 "2016-06-07T20:16:32Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > It proves the door was open, which formed the entire basis for the alleged allegation that she was a slut. > > If the door wasn’t shut, she’s not a slut. > > Regards, > Johnny Cochrane Maybe she’s an exhibitionist and\* likes\* the door open. If the door is open, there’s surely some gropin’. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2016, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/33 "2016-06-07T20:48:52Z")
Maybe the door-talk is a diversion tactic to keep everyone from wondering about the line of guys waiting their turn out back behind the dumpster. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/34 "2016-06-08T01:05:38Z")
> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#): > > The insinuation of slutty behavior comes not from hanky panky with the boyfriend, but hanky panky in a public workplace which is inappropriate. However, the assumption that sex is taking place merely because the office door is closed says volumes about the work atmosphere at that particular job. I would seek employment elsewhere if that’s feasible. I understand that but to me having inappropriate sex with your boyfriend at his workplace doesn’t make you a slut. It makes you a risk taking person and frankly kinda fun. But it doesn’t make you a slut. A “slut” is a promiscuous person. IMHO you could have sex with your boyfriend in Times Square in front of a bunch of kindergartners and that wouldn’t make you a slut. It would rapidly make you an inmate, but wouldn’t make you a slut. And I think your second sentence is exaggerated. It sounds like there is one lying bitch in the office. But the way the office dealt with the issue was textbook. And as someone who has quite a bit to do with HR and employment law, it’s the lying complainant who is in trouble here, not the boyfriend. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/35 "2016-06-08T02:36:07Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > And I think your second sentence is exaggerated. It sounds like there is one lying bitch in the office. But the way the office dealt with the issue was textbook. And as someone who has quite a bit to do with HR and employment law, it’s the lying complainant who is in trouble here, not the boyfriend. Well, the OP, who I would not consider an unbiased source in this case, claims that the _“bad GM”_ proceeded to do nothing about disciplining the complainant due to being _“very sexist against men and loves women, it was a pretty well known that he was sleeping with his assistant”_. So yes, there’s a lying bitch and a “bad GM” in the office who seem to have an axe to grind with the man in question. But I agree that OP is also making it too personal about herself, it was an attempt at railroading him and he is the one wronged. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/36 "2016-06-08T12:32:58Z")
Well no, this falls under “Reading things into it that aren’t there, then complaining about what you invented”. ---
**Author:** ![Enright3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enright3/32/2897_2.png) [@Enright3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enright3)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/37 "2016-06-08T14:49:57Z")
Maybe I’m just old and grouchy, but doesn’t this post seem odd from someone who just joined 2 days ago, and this is their only post? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/38 "2016-06-08T14:54:17Z")
> [@Enright3](#): > > Maybe I’m just old and grouchy, but doesn’t this post seem odd from someone who just joined 2 days ago, and this is their only post? Where do you get off calling her a slut?:mad: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/39 "2016-06-08T15:11:20Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Maybe the door-talk is a diversion tactic to keep everyone from wondering about the line of guys waiting their turn out back behind the dumpster. Too soon. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711/40 "2016-06-08T18:26:54Z")
Sounds like the coworker chick got all territorial about your BF. Have you smelled her perfume on his clothes lately? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-complain-that-i-was-basically-called-a-slut/756711.md?page=3)