# Should I let my 13-year old listen to these heavy metal groups? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 26, 2010, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508 "2010-01-26T14:19:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Steken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Steken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steken)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2013, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/142 "2013-11-01T13:07:41Z")
> [@MetalMaster](#): > > possibly. but what about when i wanna show them my 5FDP songs? they curse quite a bit. like this “you wanna disrespect me you little fuckin punk? everything i’ve done to be who i am? as far as i’ve fuckin come? ill slap you so fuckin hard it’ll feel like you kissed a freight train…fuck you” tgats a litfle line in their song war is the answer. how would i talk that down? This is why God invented headphones, man. Obviously you don’t want to expose them to the worst/filthiest/sickest tidbits in your collection right off the bat. Show ‘em something like Iron Maiden. Black Sabbath. The Scorpions. Guns ‘n’ Roses. Metallica. Some big, “safe” band that people of your parents’ generation can (presumably?) relate to. Then you can go on from there, explaining that, hey, guess what, there are newer bands which more or less continue in that tradition, ahem ahem, cough cough, and that’s something you’ve been listening to a lot, lately. But for the sickest of the sick, stick to headphones. No need to scare 'em off. ---
**Author:** ![MetalMaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dbc845/32.png) [@MetalMaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MetalMaster)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2013, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/143 "2013-11-01T13:12:34Z")
> [@Steken](#): > > This is why God invented headphones, man. > > Obviously you don’t want to expose them to the worst/filthiest/sickest tidbits in your collection right off the bat. Show ‘em something like Iron Maiden. Black Sabbath. The Scorpions. Guns ‘n’ Roses. Metallica. Some big, “safe” band that people of your parents’ generation can (presumably?) relate to. Then you can go on from there, explaining that, hey, guess what, there are newer bands which more or less continue in that tradition, ahem ahem, cough cough, and that’s something you’ve been listening to a lot, lately. > > But for the sickest of the sick, stick to headphones. No need to scare 'em off. i could do that. and members in killswitch engage and as i lay dying are whole heartedly christian men. i could show them that and go from there i guess. i also though dont want to show them a song called ‘burn mother fucker’ (if i can remember correctly) it goes “burn mother fucker burn mother fucker burn, you try but you cant reach me, burn mother fucker burn mother fucker birn, theres nothing you can teach me, in hell mother fucker burn mother fucker BURN!” ---
**Author:** ![Steken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Steken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steken)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2013, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/144 "2013-11-01T13:16:33Z")
> [@MetalMaster](#): > > i could do that. and members in killswitch engage and as i lay dying are whole heartedly christian men. i could show them that and go from there i guess. Yeeeeeeah, maybe - but that tactic could just as easily backfire. Because, you see, it allows your parents to say that only metal by “whole heartedly christian men” is allowed… In which case you’d miss out on a LOT of excellent metal, hahaha. Whereas if you manage to convince them that metal music is merely _harmless entertainment_, then the religious affiliation of the musicians doesn’t matter. It’s just entertainment anyway, you know. > [@MetalMaster](#): > > i also though dont want to show them a song called ‘burn mother fucker’ (if i can remember correctly) it goes “burn mother fucker burn mother fucker burn, you try but you cant reach me, burn mother fucker burn mother fucker birn, theres nothing you can teach me, in hell mother fucker burn mother fucker BURN!” No, you don’t. Unless you wanna piss them off, obviously… ---
**Author:** ![MetalMaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dbc845/32.png) [@MetalMaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MetalMaster)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2013, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/145 "2013-11-01T13:18:49Z")
yeah haha. my parents would understand the whole entertainment thing. and no im not really a teen to piss off my parents (yet hahaha) ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2013, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/146 "2013-11-01T13:58:04Z")
It can always be worse… he could be a budding Juggalo. ---
**Author:** ![MetalMaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dbc845/32.png) [@MetalMaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MetalMaster)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2013, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/147 "2013-11-01T14:29:13Z")
> [@bump](#): > > It can always be worse… he could be a budding Juggalo. now that would be hell ---
**Author:** ![ValVix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/ba8739/32.png) [@ValVix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ValVix)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/148 "2014-04-04T07:21:50Z")
everyone here seems to think that metal is what is causing all these “gangsta” wannabes, but i have a question for you, would you rather have your 13 year old IMPRESSIONABLE son be listening to this all that remains- “When I turn inward And look for strength within my self And demonstrations of courage Are the result If inspiration is wholly shared Then more is the gain Then I will follow The selfless actions displayed” or this TYGA- “I’m a motherfucking star (star) Look at the paint on the cart (cart) Too much rim make the ride too hard Tell that bitch hop out, walk the boulevard I need my money pronto Get it in the morning like Alonzo Rondo, Green got cheese like a nacho If you ain’t got no ass bitch wear a poncho” if you ask me, or any metal head, i can guarantee that they will tell you the same thing, the corruption of children these days is caused by mainstream music and rap not metal, metal is an art that sends a message to those who need it, rap is just crap, granted older rap from the 70’s and 80’s had decent content but metal has always been about sending a positive message to the listener, if you ask your son why he doesnt listen to rap or hip hop i bet you he will say he doesnt like it, i understand your concern but to be honest its more of a worry than a concern, as long as he doesnt listen to poser/sell out bands he’ll be fine, let him listen to metal as long as it doesnt go past the boundary you set for him, believe it or not there was a study done and people who listened to metal over rap/hip hop had better focus and could concentrate for longer. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/149 "2014-04-04T07:39:35Z")
> [@ValVix](#): > > but i have a question for you, would you rather have your 13 year old IMPRESSIONABLE son be listening to this > > all that remains- > “When I turn inward > And look for strength within my self > And demonstrations of courage > Are the result > If inspiration is wholly shared > Then more is the gain > Then I will follow > The selfless actions displayed” > > or this > > TYGA- > “I’m a motherfucking star (star) > Look at the paint on the cart (cart) > Too much rim make the ride too hard > Tell that bitch hop out, walk the boulevard > I need my money pronto > Get it in the morning like Alonzo > Rondo, Green got cheese like a nacho > If you ain’t got no ass bitch wear a poncho” You left out: ```auto Your vagus implodes, as nausea strikes Savaging your body in terminal retch Violent spasms and decaying enzymes Engulf your throat as you belch Intestinal disturbance, your ileum turns inside-out Your duodenum is thrust up towards your mouth Your pancreas excretes stale septic pus Your whole digestive system is now a sticky mush Rectal vomit in your thorax [Retch your anal tract](http://www.darklyrics.com/lyrics/carcass/reekofputrefaction.html#7) Liquidized oesophagus mixes with bloodied excretion As you pathetically gasp for breath The stench of hot faeces scorch your nose As you violently vomit to death Your intestines are rising, up towards your throat Stale bile escaping through your bloodied nose Your colon digested into acidic slush Your tongue gargling on your dislocated anus ``` Hmm…? ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/150 "2014-04-04T08:08:19Z")
**MetalMaster** , in my case it was rockabilly and punk (what?), but my parents learned I’d started developing my own taste in music in two places: the house and the car. In the house, because when they came into my room there would be music playing; in the car, because we took turns choosing tapes. I was very careful to never put in my tapes stuff to which my parents had objected. So, Elvis was OK (among other things because Dad didn’t understand the lyrics), but Loquillo’s _RnR Star_ (which at one point talks as if being one always involved a fall due to drugs, it’s a cautionary tale but try explaining that to parental units) was not. Loquillo’s _Cadillac solitario_ or _Quiero un camión_ no problem (the line about “grab my girl’s ass” got a parental rolleyes) - heck, most of it was ok by them; thankfully the punk groups I liked were all of the “absurd lyrics” school and my parents had no objection to that (although Dad listened very carefully to any new songs before accepting that well, ok, there was nothing objectionable about… electric appliances rebelling and leading to a sort of Night Of The Living Washing Machine scenario). You know your parents. You know that some of the songs you like would bring hell and damnation on your head. But are there others which wouldn’t? Play those where they will eventually hear them (I recommend not doing it at a volume that will shatter windows). Don’t make a big production out of it, or it will become an even bigger one. ---
**Author:** ![Steken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Steken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steken)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/151 "2014-04-04T08:34:48Z")
> [@ValVix](#): > > everyone here seems to think that metal is what is causing all these “gangsta” wannabes _No one_ said that. > [@ValVix](#): > > if you ask me, or any metal head, i can guarantee that they will tell you the same thing, the corruption of children these days is caused by mainstream music and rap Wrong again. I’m a metalhead, and I do not blame “the corruption of children these days” (whatever that is) on “mainstream music and rap.” > [@ValVix](#): > > metal is an art that sends a message to those who need it, What? No. Metal doesn’t have any unified “message.” Different bands deal with different content matter. There’s a great deal of difference between the “message” of Yngwie Malmsteen (“I can play really quick!”) and the “message” of Aryan Terrorism (“let’s eradicate the Jews!”). > [@ValVix](#): > > believe it or not there was a study done and people who listened to metal over rap/hip hop had better focus and could concentrate for longer. What study? Also, who cares if metal helps you focus and concentrate? It’s entertainment, not modafinil. ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/152 "2014-04-04T09:16:12Z")
> [@Steken](#): > > What? No. Metal doesn’t have any unified “message.” Different bands deal with different content matter. There’s a great deal of difference between the “message” of Yngwie Malmsteen (“I can play really quick!”) and the “message” of Aryan Terrorism (“let’s eradicate the Jews!”). This is especially true between genres. Like, certain genres are likely to have certain messages. Power metal is usually some form of fantasy storytelling; thrash metal very often has a strong anti-establishment vibe with social critique; death metal is likely to be rather brutal and gory… Hell, sometimes, subgenres are straight-up _defined_ by their lyrical content. Some would argue that a black metal band that changed their lyrics to bible verses but kept everything else about their music the same would no longer be black metal, but I digress. Seriously though, most of what hits the mainstream is fairly innocuous in terms of lyrical content, or so distorted that nobody has a damned clue what they’re saying anyways. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Robert163](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/4af34b/32.png) [@Robert163](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robert163)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/153 "2014-04-04T10:12:31Z")
I have personal experience with this topic: I started listening to heavy metal when I was 12, Metallica, Motor head, you know, the “hard stuff”. Pretty soon it was all I would do. I skipped school and quit the yearbook too. I’d just stay in my room and listen to heavy metal all day. Every new album from every band that came out, I just had to have it!!! Pretty soon I was out of the house, down on the street corner. Offering blow jobs to passing strangers for 20 dollars. If only my parents had forbid me to listen to that damn music! It’s all their fault!!! ---
**Author:** ![Melchior](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Melchior](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melchior)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/154 "2014-04-04T13:36:48Z")
> [@robby](#): > > My son just turned 13 years old. Within the last year, he got the video games _Guitar Hero 3_ and _Rock Band 2_ (both rated “T”; we don’t let him play games rated “M.”) This has exposed him to a lot of music he’d never heard before, and he’s now obsessed with some pretty hard core rock and heavy metal music. > > He likes the bands “Disturbed,” “DragonForce,” “Slayer,” and “All that Remains,” among others. > > He got an iTunes gift card for his birthday, and has downloaded several songs by these groups. He also got some birthday money, and bought two albums by “Disturbed,” one by “DragonForce,” and one by Ozzy Osbourne. I haven’t let him open the CDs yet. > > I’m concerned about all of this. Most of the kids who listened to this stuff when I was in high school 25 years ago were stoners. > > The only criteria my wife and I have really established for our son is that he can’t buy songs on iTunes or albums labeled “Parental Advisory - Explicit Content.” The albums he wants don’t have this label, but other ones by these groups do. > > My son is a good kid. He’s in Boy Scouts and gets straight “A’s.” Being smart, he’s probably perceived as being nerdy by his peers in school. When I asked him why he wants to listen to these groups, he says he just likes the sound of them. However, he also said that since he started listening to these groups, he’s gotten “more popular” in school. So he may be doing this to change his image in school. > > It probably goes without saying that I don’t listen to this music. It sounds like a bunch of noise to me. That being said, I understand that teenagers want to listen to different music than their parents. (My parents were appalled when I started listening to Pink Floyd’s _The Wall_ when I was 17.) > > Should I let my 13-year old son listen to these heavy metal groups? I can remove the songs from his iPod and return the unopened CDs. However, I may just make them more attractive to him, and I’m sure he can listen to them via his friends. On the other hand, I can certainly keep him from listening to them around the house. > > I’d really appreciate any guidance from other parents or anybody familiar with these groups. This stuff is garbage, and I would not let him listen to it. I never liked that crap, and refuse to have any part of it. He needs to be exposed to good music, where the songs are not about death, suffering, etc. Give him some Wagner to listen to. Ride of the Valkyries is so good! [http://youtu.be/V92OBNsQgxU](http://youtu.be/V92OBNsQgxU) [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard\_Wagner](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Wagner) ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/155 "2014-04-04T14:55:29Z")
> [@Melchior](#): > > This stuff is garbage, and I would not let him listen to it. I never liked that crap, and refuse to have any part of it. He needs to be exposed to good music, where the songs are not about death, suffering, etc. Give him some Wagner to listen to. Ride of the Valkyries is so good! > > [http://youtu.be/V92OBNsQgxU](http://youtu.be/V92OBNsQgxU) > > [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard\_Wagner](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Wagner) LOL. I don’t think you have any idea how teenage boys work. If I tried to expose my kids (at that age) to Ride of the Valkyries they would look at me like I had lost my fucking mind. And rightly so. ---
**Author:** ![Melchior](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Melchior](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melchior)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/156 "2014-04-04T15:15:31Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > LOL. I don’t think you have any idea how teenage boys work. > If I tried to expose my kids (at that age) to Ride of the Valkyries they would look at me like I had lost my fucking mind. And rightly so. Are you kidding me? TRY IT!! They’ll love it! Show them the scene in \*Apocalypse Now \*when the helicopters come in and that’s used on the soundtrack. [http://youtu.be/Gz3Cc7wlfkI](http://youtu.be/Gz3Cc7wlfkI) That’s so awesome! ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/157 "2014-04-04T15:33:42Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > LOL. I don’t think you have any idea how teenage boys work. Haha…damn straight. The entire POINT of teens listening to nasty music is to piss off their parents! And to **Melchior** , as for “not let him listen” to music you hate…just how do you plan to achieve that? Will you hire a nanny to escort him 24/7, or follow him around by yourself, helicopter-parent style? Dream on, pal – and be thankful he’s not rebelling in non-innocuous ways, like drugs or sex or extreme body piercing. ---
**Author:** ![pancakes3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ba9def/32.png) [@pancakes3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pancakes3)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/158 "2014-04-04T15:37:42Z")
> [@Melchior](#): > > This stuff is garbage, and I would not let him listen to it. I never liked that crap, and refuse to have any part of it. He needs to be exposed to good music, where the songs are not about death, suffering, etc. Give him some Wagner to listen to. Ride of the Valkyries is so good! > > [http://youtu.be/V92OBNsQgxU](http://youtu.be/V92OBNsQgxU) > > [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard\_Wagner](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Wagner) Are you kidding me?! Everyone knows that Ride of the Valkyries leads to paganism, and eventually sadism and animal brutality. Don’t be surprised that after a few listenings you end up with a yard full of dead rabbits. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yxiv3CBMS4M ---
**Author:** ![andrewm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c57346/32.png) [@andrewm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andrewm)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/159 "2014-04-04T15:38:36Z")
Maybe Mozart? Surely classical music isn’t obscene? > **[Mozart and scatology](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mozart_and_scatology)** > > Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart displayed scatological humour in his letters and multiple recreational compositions. This material has long been a puzzle for Mozart scholarship. Some scholars try to understand it in terms of its role in Mozart's family, his society and his times; others attempt to understand it as a result of an "impressive list" of psychiatric conditions from which Mozart is claimed to have suffered. > A letter dated 5 November 1777 to Mozart's cousin Maria Anna Thekla Mozart is an ex... ---
**Author:** ![Melchior](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Melchior](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melchior)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/160 "2014-04-04T15:42:59Z")
> [@pancakes3](#): > > Are you kidding me?! Everyone knows that Ride of the Valkyries leads to paganism, and eventually sadism and animal brutality. Don’t be surprised that after a few listenings you end up with a yard full of dead rabbits. > > http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yxiv3CBMS4M Link doesn’t work for me. ---
**Author:** ![Melchior](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Melchior](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melchior)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2014, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508/161 "2014-04-04T15:54:39Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#): > > Haha…damn straight. The entire POINT of teens listening to nasty music is to piss off their parents! > > And to **Melchior** , as for “not let him listen” to music you hate…just how do you plan to achieve that? Will you hire a nanny to escort him 24/7, or follow him around by yourself, helicopter-parent style? Dream on, pal – and be thankful he’s not rebelling in non-innocuous ways, like drugs or sex or extreme body piercing. When I was young (60s and 70) I hated most of the popular music of the time and still do. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-let-my-13-year-old-listen-to-these-heavy-metal-groups/526508.md?page=9)