# Should I ruin a surprise to ease someone's fears? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 4, 2005, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-ruin-a-surprise-to-ease-someones-fears/329470 "2005-11-04T13:42:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-ruin-a-surprise-to-ease-someones-fears/329470/21 "2005-11-04T21:59:03Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > It’s an **epsiode** … > > \ > > Anyway, it’s been a while since i saw the **epicode** … And it appears that i can’t spell “episode.” ---
**Author:** ![Omega\_Glory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/7c8e57/32.png) [@Omega\_Glory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omega_Glory)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-ruin-a-surprise-to-ease-someones-fears/329470/22 "2005-11-04T22:06:08Z")
All right, no more pop culture references before, say, 1990 are allowed in this thread (because that’s about as far back as I can clearly remember that kind of thing.) This \*had \* to be covered on an episode of Friends or something;) Thanks **mhendo**. That is a pretty similar situation. I wonder if he ever got the car. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-ruin-a-surprise-to-ease-someones-fears/329470/23 "2005-11-04T22:19:50Z")
I’m a little late to give advice, but I wonder if she would trust you, if you just took her aside and said, “I know something you don’t know - and it’s okay. Just trust me on this.” She might figure out it’s a surprise of some sort, but nobody\* told \* her so. She might freak out a little at first and wonder if everything is really okay, and just keep reassuring her it’s more than fine. No matter how you choose to handle the situation, I wish you luck. Also, I agree with **astro** , but it’s one of those “not my business” scenarios, for me, anyway. If the gift ends up a dud (“that sure was nice of you, bozo, now how are we going to eat?”) it really sucks, but it’s going to end between husband and wife. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-ruin-a-surprise-to-ease-someones-fears/329470/24 "2005-11-04T22:21:08Z")
> [@Anastasaeon](#): > > but it’s going to end between husband and wife. That should say “end _up_ between”. ---
**Author:** ![ZebraShaSha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/eada6e/32.png) [@ZebraShaSha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZebraShaSha)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-ruin-a-surprise-to-ease-someones-fears/329470/25 "2005-11-04T22:22:34Z")
I would tell him as follows: “Ok, that money you are hording is beginning to make her wonder. She told me cause she thought she was crazy. You should talk to her, or tell me something to tell her, or something.” > [@Omega Glory](#): > > … > Thanks mhendo. That is a pretty similar situation. I wonder if he ever got the car. It’s just a tv show! ---
**Author:** ![Omega\_Glory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/7c8e57/32.png) [@Omega\_Glory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omega_Glory)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-ruin-a-surprise-to-ease-someones-fears/329470/26 "2005-11-04T22:41:43Z")
> [@ZebraShaSha](#): > > It’s just a tv show! Dude, I’m not that far out of the loop. Even if I was, I think mhendo calling it the “Dick Van Dyke show” would have tipped me off.🙂 Could have ran long enough that she surprised him with it at some point, or maybe in a reunion ep or something. It was just a throwaway comment. Note to self: use smilies for all things in the future;) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-i-ruin-a-surprise-to-ease-someones-fears/329470.md?page=1)