Should Teens puchase their own car or have it bought for them?

In My Humble Opinion
21

It was my husband’s idea, not mine, but when my daughter got her license, she had the use of a brand-new Beetle TDI. She was required to pay her own gas, insurance, and maintenance. She was also required to have her cell phone on her whenever she was driving it and she knew if her grades slipped or she screwed up, she’d lose the car. Well, she stayed on honor roll and got a full scholarship to college, so she held up her end of the bargain.

Fortunately, she was properly appreciative. She’s now a senior in college, and when she graduates, the title will go in her name. While she never made a car payment, she’s still had to shell out a lot on the vehicle for routine maintenance and her accident deductible. And, frankly, her having a car was a boon to me - I didn’t have to drive her to work or to swim team or to see her friends. We lived in an area with no public transportation, so having a car was pretty much a necessity if your circle of friends extended farther than a mile away. Had she been more like some of her friends, there’s no way she’d have gotten the vehicle.

Incidentally, when I got my license, I was the 3rd driver in a 1-car family. When my brother got his license 2 years later, my folks sprang for a cheap second car for Mom that we were occasionally allowed to use. My first car was a piece of crap 67 Chevelle that I bought when I was 21 and in the Navy stationed in San Diego. My first new vehicle was financed thru Daddy National Bank, but I paid him in full, early, too!

22

We bought my son a car for his 16th birthday, but he sold it. He felt it was too big (85 Lincoln Continental) plus it used a lot of gas and he didn’t want to pay the insurance. He is saving money now for another one.

I never got a car from my parents - I got to use theirs.

23

When my son got his license it doubled the number of drivers in our house (my wife does not drive) At the time, I could lease a car from the company for my family’s use, and the lease included insurance and maintenance. For a 16 year old boy in LA that pretty much worked out for I paid for his insurance and they threw in a free car. The agreement was he had to take his sister to school, and had to run mom on errands when I was out of town.
His senior year, I got a chance to lease a Volvo Convertible for less than what I had been paying for a station wagon. I grabbed that, and the kid drove a new convertible to school.

When my daughter got her license, the lease deal was gone. I gave her my father’s old Volvo 240 that she drove through high school, and the first two years of college.

Both of my kids have gone on to buying their own cars.

24

I just navigated these waters with my 16-year-old son and my daughter will start driving this year. I worked for and paid for my own cars as a kid and felt pretty strongly that my kids should too. But as they approached the fateful age, my circumstances changed so that I had to start commuting a long way to work and needed a more efficient car than my old Volvo wagon with 230,000 miles on it. I wanted to keep the old buggy around since it was very useful for hauling crap and had roof racks for my windsurfing weekends, which my son was beginning to participate in. So it’s still a great “woody.”

Also, somehow over the years I got sucked up in the mindset that it’s important for my kids to be involved in a variety of activities and organizations - sports, music, drama, dance, math club, etc. - and they clearly enjoy and benefit from these, although they are decidedly overscheduled. They’re doing well and seem pretty happy, but it does require a lot of parental taxi service (even though they do use bikes and public transit as much as possible). There’s no question about it, there is considerable value *for me * in their becoming more self sufficient for transport.

So I’ve made essentially the arrangement wasson describes: “son, here’s a safe, practical, boring, useful car. You pay for gas, maintenance, and insurance.”

So far it is working out very well. When I took him to the gas station to review the basics of fueling, he was suitably alarmed to find that it costs $50 to fill the tank (which he already knew, but the experience was distinctly different when it was his $50). He even had the insight to observe “Dad, these things can really fuck up your life!” That’s for sure, son.

He uses the car very frugally. I’ve set the expectation that he will be sharing the car with his sister when she starts to drive. His cousin has just saved enough money to buy a car himself and I expect that this will become an attractive goal when he is sharing the beater with his sister.

Quite a few parents in my community have purchased brand new cars for their children. With a very few exceptions, these idiots have been rewarded with recurring collision repair bills, DUI bail expenses, and in several tragic cases, mayhem.

25

I still don’t have a car (I ride a motorcycle though, which my parents still aren’t too pleased about) and I didn’t even get my license until I was eighteen. I do live in a transit-ready area though, so there was never a great push for me to have a car, nor did my parents want to see me in one either. My older brother, on the other hand, got his license the day he turned sixteen. The only access to a car he had until he graduated university and got a job was to borrow my mom’s piece of junk once in a while.

Even if my parents could afford it, my dad was vigilantly opposed to getting my brother a car of his own. Independence and freedom wasn’t big in their books. Until we were eighteen, we lived in their house under their rules, so they would rather have control over where we were and by what means we got there. They were, most of the time, happy to pick us up if we needed a ride, but my brothers and I were a bunch of losers as teenagers (except for one, I guess) so it’s not like we had any places to go. Things are much better now that we’ve grown up - I think if one of my brothers needed financial assistance in purchasing a new car, my parents would be glad to help out.

Personally, I think my parents did it right. Except for the restrictiveness of borrowing their car (and in general, about going out) I don’t think teenagers should have access to a car of their own. If they want to drive, they should be honing up their skills on their parents’ car - that way, they aren’t handed a set of keys and told to go nuts. Then, when they can afford it, they will value the privilege of driving.

Of course, it does vary with each individual teenager. Some are responsible and should have their own car, but for the most part, I’ve seen too many unappreciative bratty, over-entitled teenagers to think it’s a good idea to give them sole possession.

26

Purchase their own. Whether that means saving up first and buying it themselves or having a loan from the parents that they pay back.

27

I know a guy in high school whose parents bought him a brand-new BMW convertible and never once expected him to even pay for gas. Last I heard he’s had to move back home, because he has no idea of how to manage money.

I think that what wasson describes is good if parents are going to buy their kids a car. “Here’s this. Now earn it.”

Or you could do what my parents did and say, “If you want a car, go and buy one.” In that case the kid will either realize they don’t need a car that badly, or they’ll get a bit better at personal finance and creativity earlier than many of their peers - how do you get to work if you don’t have a car? Can you resist the urge to blow your entire paycheck on whatever?

(FTR, I did the first thing and realized I didn’t need a car, and I’m damn glad for it.)

28

I had a student whose parents bought her a brand new BMW: she graduated Validictorian and got into one of the top dance programs in the country, where she is thriving.

I am not saying their aren’t plenty of spoiled screw-ups out there. But there are many, many ways to invest a child with a solid work ethic and strong values.

29

My husband went to high school in suburban Detroit with lots of offspring of auto execs. (One of his schoolmates was an Iacocca.) He said many of them had new 'Vettes/Mustangs/Camaros every year. He, on the other hand, bought a decrepit Pinto with the money he earned bussing tables. Since this was in the 70s, cars were still somewhat friendly for shadetree mechanics, so he learned a lot just keeping his wheels on the road.

The most important thing he learned - sometimes the best tool for the job is a checkbook. We’re at the stage in our lives when we can adhere to that…

30

Graduated HS in '90. Learned to drive in '87. My parents supported my desire to drive, and I had to make the cash to take a driving class AND then pass their own driving test. (Basically, my mom fussing at me the entire time when I was trying to drive.)

They made it clear that I could borrow a car in an emergency or to run errands for the household, but if I wanted to drive on a regular basis I would have to work. We sat down and looked at the decent beaters in the paper - you could get a car better than a Chevette for about $900-$1200. That was a summer’s worth of savings, so I went nuts sacking groceries, selling papers, taking extra shifts, etc. I still had to maintain grades and household chores. If those slipped I could have all the money in the world and I wouldn’t have a car.

I bought an Isuzu I-Mark in '88, from a GI who was PCS-ing to Germany. It was an '81 model, 4-door, reasonably good shape. Not a fancy car but I put in a nice radio and treated it real nice. Even saved up cash to replace the clutch when it died. I also had to find my own insurance and pay for it. The good grades stuff really kicked in, because I paid a very reasonable amount for a 17 year old driver. (Also, driving a 8 year old 4-banger with 4 doors was probably helpful.) The car lasted me until right before college. I wasn’t allowed just to take off when I wanted, I had to ask to go places, but I was very responsible.

My parents’ plan was probably half by design, and half by the fact they couldn’t afford to buy cars for me or my sis. My kids will have a similar path, though I might be willing to foot half the bill. It’s probably better to have a later-model car for a little more. They’ll definitely be getting a 4-door sedan or station wagon, so none of their buddies will be tempted to drag race or any of that dumb shit.

31

We’re not parents yet, but this is actually something we’ve already discussed about our hypothetical future children.

The husband and I both grew up without much cash other than what we earned starting in our very early teens - I was suburban poor in a rich area, he was in-the-middle-of-nowhere-country poor. Neither of us had a car until we bought one together after college. I didn’t have my license; he occasionally borrowed his mother’s little Toyota Tercel if we were going to a concert or something (she lived 45 minutes away).

(Scholarships, grants, and student loans are wonderful things, by the way. It was a very good school. )

Our child(ren) will be either given the opportunity to buy a car on their own, or have a reasonable amount of matching money (say a couple of thousand dollars) put towards helping to buy it. Either way they’re not allowed to buy something so junky as to be dangerous to drive or constantly in the shop. We will pay the insurance, as New Jersey insurance is outrageously expensive. If they take the matching amount, they’re responsible for all gas, maintenance, and repairs; we will chip in some if they buy their own.

Regardless of how they buy or even if they buy a car, they will be required to work a part time job. I understand that the average child is extremely busy these days. Frankly, we consider it kind of loony. Sure, they can do a sport or theater or whatever other kinds of afterschool activities that they want to - we did. But why more than one at a time?

32

My parents bought me a car when I was 16. It was new and had every safety feature possible. This was in Los Angeles and most students at my school got cars from their parents too. Except theirs were BMWs and Audis and such. I honestly think my parents were just tired of driving me around. Before that I would take the bus around the city, and often got stranded if a bus never materialized or the driver decided not to stop, which I think drove my always-worried mother crazy. I don’t really think having a car bought by my parents made me any more spoiled than if I’d had to work at a Starbucks for it. Instead, I worked really hard at school, volunteered 10 hours a week as a docent at a local aquarium (which is probably why I’m a biology student now), and so on. Not that this is how all parents should be, but it worked out well for me.

Of course, now the car’s sitting in my driveway at home, probably rusting or something :smack:

33

Nobody ever gave me a car so I don’t see why anyone else should get one.

I don’t think high school kids should even be allowed to drive, much less given cars.

34

We helped the kids get their first cars. They couldn’t get loans in their own names, so we took out the loans and paid the insurance. But they had to get jobs and every month, they have to write a check to the Parents National Bank, as the kids refer to it.

35

My parents bought me my first car. Well, I had to share it with my twin sister, but essentially we were given a car. No strings attached. Merry Christmas 1993.

Our other siblings worked for theirs.

For awhile, I felt guilty, like my sister and I were being spoiled. But my father explained it like this. My twin and I were great students. We were obedient, didn’t get into trouble, didn’t break stuff, and we had jobs (we started working at 15). We had evening extracurricular activities that made MARTA bus rides dangerous. Plus, we never bugged them for stuff. We didn’t even get an allowance. We were simple, low maintenance kids who’s only request (meekly submitted to our mother, who acted as our go-between) was a car when we got our license.

On the other hand, our older siblings were on the opposite end of the spectrum. In my father’s mind, they weren’t worthy of a free car.

I still didn’t understand it even after he explained it to me, but now that I’m grown up, I’m starting to come around. A car is like any other gift. There are plently of able-bodied but unemployed teenagers who still expect their parents to shell out for their wardrobe, movie tickets, field trip money, prom money, mall money, and late-night pizza money, and the parents oblige as long as the kids “follow the rules”. All of my high school friends were like this. Interestingly, none of my friends had cars. So, I don’t think I got anything “extra” by getting a car. It’s just that my parental blessing manifested itself in a four-wheeled, gas-guzzeling machine instead of designer jeans and fancy stereo equipment.

36

Wanted to pop in here to say the same thing. Yeah, I was one of the lucky ones to get a lightly used car. But my parents instilled work ethic in me through school - it was my job (although I had a part time job through part of high school and each summer of college). I’m currently getting ready to move to a new city with my first post-college job. I’m happy to have that vehicle as public transport isn’t that great around here and there’s a lot of highway driving. But I’m also worrying about budgeting already, and my parents are laughing at how concerned I am about it. I do have them as a safety net, but I’ve also learned the value of a dollar through them.

37

My parents gave me my dad’s old car when I got my license - a Saturn sedan that was, at that point, 8 years old and had 226k miles on it. It lasted me about another six years of relatively light driving (didn’t quite hit 250k before I was done with it) with absolutely minimal maintenance costs and getting 32+ mpg the whole time. My parents also paid for basically everything until I left for college (I didn’t work at all in HS, and very sparingly during college), and even when I was in college, they paid for all of the essentials while I only really had to use my own money for entertainment.

Was I a little spoiled? Relative to a lot of the people out there, probably, yeah. Do I think that I would have been better off if I had to work for every little bit of it? No, not really. I was a three-sport athlete in HS, tons of clubs, all of the AP stuff that they offered, all that jazz. It saved my parents a ton of trouble to not have to drive me around, and not having to work in HS was instrumental in making me as well-rounded as I like to think that I am. Cliche or not, education - both academics and everything else - was my job, and as long as I was clearly putting the effort into that, they were willing to help me out. They did a good enough job with the whole instilling fiscal prudence and general responsibility through other methods that I turned out pretty well in those areas.

I think it all depends on the individual kid… and for that matter, this shouldn’t be an open-and-shut decision for any parents or potential parents until the question actually comes around. When your kid is 15 or 16, you’ll hopefully know them well enough to know what will best serve them. I’m just not sure if you can make a blanket decision that will necessarily be the best for some as-yet-unborn child.

38

People appreciate and take better care of the things they work for over the things that are given to them. If you want your children to appreciate hard work, there’s no better way than to let them work hard for something.

39

My mom bought me my car in high school because I really needed one to get to my internship and get back to school on time. When she gave it to me, I knew that she couldn’t really afford it and really appreciated it. It wasn’t a new sports car, it was a '97 pickup truck (this was in 2003). Plus I think she wanted me to start hauling my rabbit stuff around myself instead of schlepping cages and feed and hay in her car. I don’t think the fact that I didn’t buy it lessened the lesson. Then again, I was always a responsible kind of kid and respected my mom.

40

I, like some people here, got my license a little later than most people (permit at 18, license at 20). Up until then, I got by using the bus and mostly a bicycle. I should also note that that was the most physically fit point in my life so far; I’d bike for miles and miles.

As a teen, being unsucessful at both finding a summer job job and not having anything terribly productive to do with my time in the summer, I would ride my bike five miles over to a nickel arcade and play on a malfunctioning (free) DDR machine for around 1-2 hours, then ride 5 miles back home. I would do this 3-4 times a week.

I was given a 1980 Ford Pinto as my first car. Granted it was free, but it had bad gas mileage and numerous mechanical problems which got expensive. I did get sproadic summer jobs and the car certainly helped. I got reacquanted with some old friends and it turned out I was the only one who could drive/owned a car, which was a nice ego boost (since I felt kinda dorky having to get a license at 20 after two unsucessful attempts). I learned a lot about taking car of an old beater.

I found out I could get rid of the car because of the age, to the state and get $500. I did, and used the money to buy an old 1987 Toyota Corrola from my uncle. I owned that for a while until I got in a car accident.

My mom helped me find a great deal on a used 2000 Ford Focus. Only problem was that it was $6,000 and I only had $1,000 at the time. Still, the car was in excellent shape so she loaned me $5,000. I pledged that I would pay her back as quickly as possible, and still living at home it was easy enough to pay her back in ten months time (with ten $500 installments). All along the way I was paying for my own gas and insurance.

I feel like my experience (paying as much within my means as possible) made me really feel like having a car was definitely a privlege, not a right. I really try to take care of it because aside from being my most valuable possession it made a lot of things in my life feasable. I was able to work three part-time jobs while doing a full load in college thanks to having a set of wheels.

My girlfriend was given a car at 16 and currently does not pay for insurance even though she lives at home and works enough to afford it. It made me feel a bit of resentment because her own experience made her really naive about working hard to earn something, keeping grades up for a good driver discount, trying to really avoid getting tickets, etc.