# Should the female partner be a "princess"? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 9, 2013, 9:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472 "2013-03-09T09:55:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/21 "2013-03-09T15:46:19Z")
> [@BrassyPhrase](#): > > Exactly. I do a bunch of things for my Fella and he trips over himself to be good to me. Two people who treasure each other. > If he ever treated me like a “princess” I actually would faint, from the “Omg, are you fucking kidding me”? meme. But what you describe doing is exactly what many people mean by it. “Treasure each other.” From the context of **JohnMace** ’s other posts, I’m pretty sure this is all his wife is, forlornly, hoping for. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/22 "2013-03-09T15:49:16Z")
Father of 3 kids here, 2 boys and the youngest is a girl. I often told my daughter while she was growing up that “you are always _ **my** _ princess, but you cannot ever be _ **a** _ princess” - a subtle yet very important distinction. She’ll be 25 soon, and she’s a good kid. Tough, self-assured, gets along great with others, a lady, and definitely not a princess. All this despite the mental anguish I tried to inflict. In a couple of months she’ll be leaving on a 4-month cross-country solo road trip. California, up to Alaska, then over to NY and New England, then south to Florida, then back. Simply an adventure. I’m pretty proud of her. ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/23 "2013-03-09T16:03:23Z")
> [@Peremensoe](#): > > “Treasure each other.” From the context of **JohnMace** ’s other posts, I’m pretty sure this is all his wife is, forlornly, hoping for. Oops, of course I meant **JohnClay** there. No resemblance to **John Mace** ; apologies. ---
**Author:** ![Rodgers01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b19c9b/32.png) [@Rodgers01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rodgers01)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/24 "2013-03-09T16:11:31Z")
> [@missred](#): > > A princess? Most royalty marries other royalty, making you a prince by default. Does she treat you like a prince? > > My point is that, barring a mutual agreement of inequality, neither should be the princess/prince with the other as a commoner. > > Just my $.02. My thinking exactly. It irritates me to hear women say they deserve a guy who will treat them like a princess with no evident indication that they will likewise treat the guy as a prince. ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/25 "2013-03-09T16:15:41Z")
> [@Napier](#): > > It is key to have some kind of understanding about which role each person plays in the relationship. For example, in my marriage, we both understand I make the big decisions and she makes the small ones. I decide who should be president, whether there is a god, what is the origin of the universe, stuff like that. She decides where we go on vacation, when we buy new cars, and other mundane things. > > He, he, hee! > > No, seriously, the whole “Princess” thing is messed up. I’m in charge of all the big decisions in our household. It’s only been thirty years, and the Wife promises she will let me know if know if one does come up. ---
**Author:** ![Ostrya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/35a633/32.png) [@Ostrya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ostrya)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/26 "2013-03-09T16:20:11Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > My sister put the idea in my wife’s head that she could be a princess… but I didn’t like the idea. Later I said that it meant that the wife would be stuck up and always _expect_ exceptional treatment. I’d rather they appreciate special treatment. Let her be a princess, fantasy is good as long as the scheduled cooking and cleaning gets done. What’s the harm? If she demands special treatment by playing the princess card, patiently explain that she’s a princess, just not in that particular context. Meanwhile, get her one of those cardboard crowns at burger king. > [@ladyfoxfyre](#): > > Threadshit much? I haven’t been getting out much lately. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/27 "2013-03-09T16:51:34Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > I bet if your wife were, like, a 9 she’d be deserving of being treated like a princess-- but I can’t help but laugh at the thought of a big-bellied 5 expecting any such thing. Balderdash, I say! As you wish your highness 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Tollhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e99b99/32.png) [@Tollhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tollhouse)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/28 "2013-03-09T16:58:13Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Princess? No. Duchess? Maybe. oh my gosh,kayaker, you are hilarious! where is the busting up laughing icon? ---
**Author:** ![Tollhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e99b99/32.png) [@Tollhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tollhouse)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/29 "2013-03-09T16:59:54Z")
what about dads who treat their daughters like a princess? in fairness, moms sometimes do a version of this with their sons though im not sure which parent tends to be more extreme, a dad who always sees his daughter as his little princess and will kill anyone who even looks at her funny, and gets her everything she wants etc. and any future son in law beware when meeting protector dad… OR, a mom to her son, especially a firstborn son, ,…any future daughter in law will forever be under the watchdog mom and likely not good enough for her baby boy…that mom and baby boy thing almost seems more entrenched ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/30 "2013-03-09T17:11:21Z")
> [@solosam](#): > > It’s already pretty clear that women expect exceptional treatment. > > [Guys and creepiness - In My Humble Opinion - Straight Dope Message Board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=683864) Don’t drag a topic from one thread into another in the manner you did here. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/31 "2013-03-09T17:12:27Z")
The princess thing is bad enough aimed at little girls but it’s flat out gross aimed at adult women. I don’t think a woman who wasn’t really immature would ever say she wants to be treated like a princess. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/32 "2013-03-09T17:13:07Z")
> [@Tollhouse](#): > > what about dads who treat their daughters like a princess? in fairness, moms sometimes do a version of this with their sons though > > im not sure which parent tends to be more extreme, a dad who always sees his daughter as his little princess and will kill anyone who even looks at her funny, and gets her everything she wants etc. and any future son in law beware when meeting protector dad… OR, a mom to her son, especially a firstborn son, ,…any future daughter in law will forever be under the watchdog mom and likely not good enough for her baby boy…that mom and baby boy thing almost seems more entrenched I think parents, and fathers to daughters as you say, who do this do a general disservice to mankind. Doing this makes life miserable for the men who become their boyfriends/husbands. Either that, or the proliferation of such girls creates a “market” for such pansy-ass asswipes who think they are men, cultivating more of them, and this becomes a disservice to society. That is why upthread, [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=16081166#post16081166), I would tell my daughter when raising her that she is always _ **my** _ princess, but she cannot be _ **a** _ princess. ---
**Author:** ![romansperson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/romansperson/32/17100_2.png) [@romansperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/romansperson)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/33 "2013-03-09T17:36:12Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Princess? No. Duchess? Maybe. Pfft. Goddess is more like it! ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/34 "2013-03-09T17:42:35Z")
I believe women should be put on a pedestal. Just high enough to look up their dress. Stolen from Steve Martin ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/35 "2013-03-09T18:30:25Z")
> [@solosam](#): > > It’s already pretty clear that women expect exceptional treatment. > > [Guys and creepiness - In My Humble Opinion - Straight Dope Message Board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=683864) > [@ladyfoxfyre](#): > > Threadshit much? > [@the lone cashew](#): > > I haven’t been getting out much lately. umm…What? ---
**Author:** ![Meatros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Meatros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meatros)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/36 "2013-03-09T18:37:48Z")
> [@Troppus](#): > > umm…What? Yeah, noticed that too… ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/37 "2013-03-09T18:38:40Z")
When my mother has called me “princess”, she’s clearly implied that I’m spoiled or always want to get my own way, so I hate the term. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/38 "2013-03-09T20:51:45Z")
“So you want a tiara, a big poufy dress, and a curse from a wicked fairy? Well, OK…” ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/39 "2013-03-09T23:05:10Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > She recognizes me to be the Captain, and defers to me. It all works out. Gee I don’t know. Maybe that works for you and Tennille but I am suspicious of adopting any kind of identity role that involves arbitrary capitalisation. ---
**Author:** ![JohnClay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@JohnClay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnClay)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2013, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472/40 "2013-03-09T23:32:40Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > I bet if your wife were, like, a 9 she’d be deserving of being treated like a princess-- but I can’t help but laugh at the thought of a big-bellied 5 expecting any such thing. Balderdash, I say! I’ve read PUA materials and they say to do things like tease super hot girls a bit, etc… not think they’re “the one” or put her on the pedestal like she’s the perfect girl. In the past I did think some girls were 9’s - there was one young teen I talked to on the phone… I suggested she come with me to my friend’s house and watch porno’s. i.e. I didn’t really put her on a pedestal. BTW I do show my wife a lot of love, just not the princess level where I consistently always put her first. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-female-partner-be-a-princess/652472.md?page=3)