# Should the USA annex Alberta? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 24, 2014, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094 "2014-12-24T14:07:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/61 "2014-12-27T15:29:18Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > After a foreign invasion seizing a major piece of the country? An insurgency and assymettric counter-attacks including acts of terrorism and sabotage on U.S. soil is pretty much a sure thing. Imagine if ISIS operatives could casually walk into U.S. territory, set buildings on fire, and then simply blend into not some amorphous-looking foreign population (where collateral damage reports generate tongue clucks and shrugs from Americans), but the U.S. population itself. > > Couple that with sabotage on _Canadian_ soil to deny the Americans access to the resources they seek to loot (are they going to dispatch their entire army to guard thousands of kilometers of oil pipelines, roads and power lines?) and it’ll make the Iraqi invasion look exactly as quick and easy as Bush promised it would be. > > Canada as now known may be destroyed. The U.S. would soon follow. Stop, Ekers, my sides are aching! ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/62 "2014-12-27T17:10:31Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > Stop, Ekers, my sides are aching! So how much have you gained from invading Iraq versus how much have you lost? And this is without the Iraqis being able to walk into your country, blend in perfectly with your population and burn or blow up any civilian target they want. ---
**Author:** ![MichaelEmouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/michaelemouse/32/101_2.png) [@MichaelEmouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MichaelEmouse)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/63 "2014-12-27T17:15:06Z")
> [@Martin\_Hyde](#): > > I can’t imagine a scenario in which Canadians would fight an occupation, certainly not using terrorism tactics–they’d be afraid of running afoul of various international treaties. Do you consider Quebecers to be Canadian? Also, what treaties would those be? When you say “terrorism tactics”, are you referring more broadly to sabotage/guerilla/assassinations? I don’t think any of those are forbidden to an occupied population. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/64 "2014-12-27T17:15:13Z")
There’s nothing funnier than when a class clown type, who always considers himself the funniest guy in the room and who has been known to taunt others over lack of humor, gets all harrumphy-and not a little pompous-and doesn’t fucking realize it. Yer killing me here, Ekers! ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/65 "2014-12-27T17:29:04Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > There’s nothing funnier than when a class clown type, who always considers himself the funniest guy in the room and who has been known to taunt others over lack of humor, gets all harrumphy-and not a little pompous-and doesn’t fucking realize it. Yer killing me here, Ekers! I don’t have to get harrumphy or pompous. You’re talking casually about abruptly ending one of your country’s biggest (if not its biggest) trade relationship and inviting years of on-your-soil terrorist attacks against which your only defense will be to police-state your own population, to gain resources that you’ll barely be able to exploit if at all. If the stupidity of this isn’t obvious to you, there’s little I could add. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/66 "2014-12-27T17:31:47Z")
As an incidental note, I can’t recall ever taunting anyone for lacking a sense of humour. I can certainly understand why some jokes aren’t funny to some people. Taunting them because of that is a waste of time. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/67 "2014-12-27T18:06:02Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > Stop, Ekers, my sides are aching! i can’t believe he’s taking this stuff seriously. We have inadvertently triggered an outbreak of bizarro Canadian hyper-patriotism. Even now there may be weirdly costumed Albertan militias drilling on the frigid tundra, intent on repelling an American invasion. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/68 "2014-12-27T18:09:45Z")
The Ekers-Scumpup conflict of 2014 is likely to evoke more of the horror of war than actual hostilities between the US and Canada. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/69 "2014-12-27T18:10:34Z")
Hey Bryan, I thought this thread was mostly tongue-in-cheek. No need to elevate it to any level of seriousness. None of this will ever happen for a multitude of reasons. ---
**Author:** ![Martin\_Hyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/47e85d/32.png) [@Martin\_Hyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martin_Hyde)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/70 "2014-12-27T19:01:22Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > As an incidental note, I can’t recall ever taunting anyone for lacking a sense of humour. I can certainly understand why some jokes aren’t funny to some people. Taunting them because of that is a waste of time. I mean seriously, we’re talking about an American invasion of Canada. It’s patently absurd. I find it shocking anyone, regardless of their sense of humor, took it seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Motorgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e36b37/32.png) [@Motorgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motorgirl)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/71 "2014-12-27T19:23:00Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > By your logic, should Canada annex Washington state or Vermont? Those two states are similar to Canada. I’ve always thought that a Vermont - Quebec match-up sounded logical. They’ve both got separatist tendencies and could make a nice little country together. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/72 "2014-12-27T19:29:29Z")
Maybe we could talk swap, but no way, no how are we taking Texas ! Personally, I think Minnesota or Washington State might work for us. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/73 "2014-12-27T20:28:32Z")
> [@Martin\_Hyde](#): > > I mean seriously, we’re talking about an American invasion of Canada. It’s patently absurd. Well, of course, and I’ve commented why this is so. > [@](#): > > I find it shocking anyone, regardless of their sense of humor, took it seriously. It’s a mildly interesting thought experiment to me - what if a NATO country (or a G7 member) suddenly went mad and/or elected a fascist government and grabbed a chunk of another NATO/G7 country? The instant global economic effects would be entertainingly catastrophic, and the particular permutation of U.S./Canada is the one where the attacker is awesomely vulnerable to counter-attacks because of a huge insecurable border and enemy agents who will look just like the invaders, perfectly speak their language and be familiar with their customs. Amusingly, a Canadian retaliatory terrorist might try to darken his skin and fake a _Mexican_ accent, because a white guy who speaks clear English will become an object of suspicion and Mexicans might start to appear relatively “safe”. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/74 "2014-12-27T23:17:36Z")
> [@Giles](#): > > … The only downside would be that Texas would become the third largest state in the union. You say that like it’d be a bad thing? ---
**Author:** ![Marion\_Wormer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@Marion\_Wormer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marion_Wormer)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2014, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/75 "2014-12-28T06:55:05Z")
Maybe we could ask Quebec to secede and become the 51st US state. We’d get a lot of electric power and the soothing sound of Quebecois in Congress. Canada could sigh a deep breath of relief with the realization the the Night of the Long Knives (1982) will never be mentioned in Parliament again. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2014, 7:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/76 "2014-12-28T07:33:41Z")
No. We need the hockey players. And the poutine. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2014, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/77 "2014-12-28T07:37:13Z")
Double post. Excusez-moi. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2014, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/78 "2014-12-28T08:20:00Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > \ > It’s a mildly interesting thought experiment to me - what if a NATO country (or a G7 member) suddenly went mad and/or elected a fascist government and grabbed a chunk of another NATO/G7 country? The instant global economic effects would be entertainingly catastrophic, and the particular permutation of U.S./Canada is the one where the attacker is awesomely vulnerable to counter-attacks because of a huge insecurable border and enemy agents who will look just like the invaders, perfectly speak their language and be familiar with their customs.\ It is an interesting thought experiment - my husband and I hashed out the idea of a US invasion one long car trip, and came to the conclusion that there is no way it would succeed, for various reasons (one of the foremost being the point you’ve already made, that there is virtually no way to readily distinguish Americans from Canadians). ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2014, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/79 "2014-12-28T23:01:08Z")
For what it’s worth, I can envision an in-all-but-name annexation after a series of gradual political adjustments where the U.S. moves a little leftward and Canada a little rightward and eventually forms, with Mexico, a North American economic union comparable to the E.U. It wouldn’t be the U.S. taking over as such, but theit position would be significantly more dominant than Germany’s in the E.U. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2014, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094/80 "2014-12-29T04:43:53Z")
Given that Alberta has the freest economy in North America, I’d rather not have us be pulled to the left by America, thank you. (: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-the-usa-annex-alberta/708094.md?page=5)