# Should we teach our kids how to get drunk? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [June 8, 2016, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825 "2016-06-08T13:50:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/21 "2016-06-08T15:33:13Z")
I think the idea is iffy with teenagers, and downright dangerous when it comes to preteens. Their minds and bodies are still developing, they are still subject to much more peer pressure than you think, and their young bodies are _much_ more susceptible to both alcohol addiction and alcohol poisoning then you realize. Most parents are not properly trained when it comes to this matter. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/22 "2016-06-08T15:34:35Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > Sorry, didn’t mean to imply that it was. But the French model, at least, is a lot more lenient when it comes to introducing minors to alcohol. Not to get them drunk, of course, but to teach them to drink responsibly. It’s a good idea. We turn alcohol into forbidden fruit and then we’re surprised when our kids get kicked out of the garden. In Jr. High school our health teacher, Mr. Cochran I think, one of the gym teachers, a good guy really, stepped over the lines and taught us how to drink. No, he didn’t give us alcohol, he told us how to be cool about it, how to pay attention to how much we were drinking, to pace ourselves, to judge the effect. He went into the differences in alcohol level in beer, wine and hard liquor, to make sure not to drink on an empty stomach, even staying hydrated to avoid hangovers. It was important stuff, especially for someone who ended up drinking more frequently as a teenager than an adult. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/23 "2016-06-08T15:46:02Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > I think the idea is iffy with teenagers, and downright dangerous when it comes to preteens. Their minds and bodies are still developing, they are still subject to much more peer pressure than you think, and their young bodies are _much_ more susceptible to both alcohol addiction and alcohol poisoning then you realize. Most parents are not properly trained when it comes to this matter. My parents let me have a sip of whatever was being served at various festive family gatherings as far back as I can remember. When I was 9, my uncle took me to the beach with his friends and let me have ONE beer, which I found disgusting but nursed all afternoon and felt included and special. Alcohol was never a taboo in any way when I was growing up and everybody in my family drank responsibly in all situations. I did the same with my kids who are 17 and 20 now. To their credit, they do not show any signs of being likely to abuse alcohol while being very aware of how some of their peers seem to exhibit a lack of understanding about their own limits. ---
**Author:** ![Bone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bone/32/407_2.png) [@Bone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bone)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/24 "2016-06-08T16:07:46Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Wait-how old are they now? Not yet teenagers. Specifics beyond that won’t be forthcoming. From what I’ve read, a sip of non-hard alcohol isn’t a risk to brain development but if you have information on that I’d be glad to read it. The risk is more behavioral and in those areas I take a holistic view. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/25 "2016-06-08T16:08:27Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > My parents let me have a sip of whatever was being served at various festive family gatherings as far back as I can remember. When I was 9, my uncle took me to the beach with his friends and let me have ONE beer, which I found disgusting but nursed all afternoon and felt included and special. Alcohol was never a taboo in any way when I was growing up and everybody in my family drank responsibly in all situations. I did the same with my kids who are 17 and 20 now. To their credit, they do not show any signs of being likely to abuse alcohol while being very aware of how some of their peers seem to exhibit a lack of understanding about their own limits. Even if I accept that every single part of what you say about your family and their utter responsibility when it comes to drinking alcohol is true, the questions isn’t whether it was a good idea in your particular situation, but whether it would be a good idea all around. Is your neighborhood made up entirely of households of totally responsible drinkers? When it came to all your classmates, did all their parents drink responsibly in all situations? When it came to this particular “life lesson”, how many parents would be excellent teachers that always drink responsibly in all situations…and how many would be “Well, hell-If Junior passes out, at least I’ll know where he’s at.”? ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/26 "2016-06-08T16:49:19Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Even if I accept that every single part of what you say about your family and their utter responsibility when it comes to drinking alcohol is true, the questions isn’t whether it was a good idea in your particular situation, but whether it would be a good idea all around. Is your neighborhood made up entirely of households of totally responsible drinkers? When it came to all your classmates, did all their parents drink responsibly in all situations? > When it came to this particular “life lesson”, how many parents would be excellent teachers that always drink responsibly in all situations…and how many would be “Well, hell-If Junior passes out, at least I’ll know where he’s at.”? _Anecdotally_, my point is that I don’t see a real advantage in restricting pre-teens access to very small and supervised amounts of alcohol. Which is not the same thing as suggesting, like the OP, that kids should be permitted to explore their limits with alcohol in order to teach them about possible consequences of being drunk. As for the larger picture, my neighbourhood, in fact, the society in which I grew up has had a historically unhealthy relationship with alcohol. So I grew up seeing that side of it as well. When I got older and was old enough to drink legally (18), I often found myself in situations where my friends drank more than they should have. Hell, I admit to having a few too many from time to time. But only because that’s what many young adults do. All that to say, parents are responsible for teaching their kids many things. I don’t see why responsible alcohol consumption can’t be one of those things. And no, not every parent is a good teacher, or even good example. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/27 "2016-06-08T16:53:13Z")
> [@treis](#): > > I think many/most of us have an experience like that. Luckily for the vast majority the consequences don’t go beyond embarrassment and a bad hang over. I don’t think teaching people their limit is something that would work. It’s something that they need to learn for themselves. What needs to be taught is strategies for this to happen in a place where the consequences aren’t being raped behind a dumpster. Well the thing is once you pass out you dont know what is going to happen to you. One should never get that drunk. Plus during the course you dont know what you will say or do. Hopefully its nothing more than some embarrassing pictures on social media but it can be much worse. And the problem is with some drinks you cant even taste the alcohol so you dont know how much your getting. ---
**Author:** ![filmore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7993a0/32.png) [@filmore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filmore)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/28 "2016-06-08T16:55:58Z")
Even if kids drank occasionally with their parents at meals like in Europe, that doesn’t necessarily prepare them for the party atmosphere typical at colleges in the USA where sometimes drinking to excess is the norm and one of the main goals. Of course it would be better if that wasn’t typical, but that’s the world we live in. If nothing else, kids should be educated on how 1 drink at dinner isn’t the same as 4-5 in an hour at a party. Hopefully they never drink to excess, but if they do, they would be better off if they could know what to expect to retain some control. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/29 "2016-06-08T17:21:24Z")
> [@Me\_Billy](#): > > No, I am NOT going to give my kids alcohol. > > Rather I teach them how to have fun without alcohol. How to deal with problems and stress without alcohol - something they will use all their lives. Parents who allow their children alcohol aren’t necessarily (or even commonly) trying to teach them to ‘deal with problems and stress’ via alcohol. So it’s perfectly possible to teach your children to deal with problems sensibly, and to allow them alcohol, as two entirely independent things. I mean, some people deal with stress by gorging on chocolate, but giving chocolate to your children isn’t necessarily imposing it as a proposed solution to stress. ---
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/30 "2016-06-08T17:49:58Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > I think kids get enough lessons at home from parents about the hazards of getting drunk, and there are certainly a crapload of parents out there unqualified to teach _anybody_ how to drink “safely”. Yeah, how can anyone reach college age without seeing _someone_ in their sphere of life dealing with the negative effects of alcohol? Maybe mom and dad don’t drink, but some uncle, aunt, neighbor, classmate has royally screwed up due to over indulgence of alcohol. Crashed a car, got arrested, lost a relationship, got in an argument, something. Examples on TV or internet, something. If a college age young person is really not aware of the problems alcohol abuse can cause they probably aren’t ready to leave the house yet. Teaching your kids how to be a \*good person \*will tell them what they need to know about getting drunk. The Stanford rapist is a shitty young person and his dad is a shitty older person for defending him. Alcohol doesn’t create the monster, it just lets it out. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/31 "2016-06-08T18:10:15Z")
> [@Dallas\_Jones](#): > > Alcohol doesn’t create the monster, it just lets it out. Or, in my case, alcohol massages the monster’s shoulders, whispers in his ear, and gradually metamorphs the monster into Dr Henry Jekyll. ---
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/32 "2016-06-08T18:34:39Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Or, in my case, alcohol massages the monster’s shoulders, whispers in his ear, and gradually metamorphs the monster into Dr Henry Jekyll. My closest friend from school was a loud, talkative, gregarious, obnoxious, bit of an alcoholic asshole and I always wondered what type of person he would be without the drinking. One month about 30 years ago I watched his house while he went in for treatment. And he has stayed sober all of these 30 odd years. He turned out to be a loud, talkative, gregarious, obnoxious sober person. He would be dead long ago if he hadn’t stopped, but the personality did not change. He just learned not to say that next stupid thing he would have said, or not do that next stupid thing he would have done. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Lowry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Sam\_Lowry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Lowry)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/33 "2016-06-08T18:36:15Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > Hey, I’m all for a more European model of drinking, but I think the problem is better addressed by teaching our sons not to force themselves on women, and that a passed out woman can’t give consent. I agree. A man who respects women and values consent isn’t going to drag an unconscious woman into an alley and rape her whether he’s sober or drunk. Someone who would do that while drunk is likely not totally respectful of women while stone cold sober. There is a lot that could and should be changed about the drinking culture here, but what we are teaching kids about sex and consent is also a big issue. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/34 "2016-06-08T19:15:13Z")
> [@filmore](#): > > Even if kids drank occasionally with their parents at meals like in Europe, that doesn’t necessarily prepare them for the party atmosphere typical at colleges in the USA where sometimes drinking to excess is the norm and one of the main goals. Of course it would be better if that wasn’t typical, but that’s the world we live in. If nothing else, kids should be educated on how 1 drink at dinner isn’t the same as 4-5 in an hour at a party. Hopefully they never drink to excess, but if they do, they would be better off if they could know what to expect to retain some control. It’s not just about having a little wine occasionally, it’s about raising children up to be adults in a real world environment. It’s not just the drinking, but talking about it, giving them the opportunity to feel confident when they end up in the peer driven atmosphere of parties, and plenty of other situations. ---
**Author:** ![Claverhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/13edae/32.png) [@Claverhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claverhouse)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/35 "2016-06-08T19:40:34Z")
The family that drinks together, thinks together ! ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/36 "2016-06-08T20:03:08Z")
Anecdatum: Another person raised with the French model (well, Italian in my case). Child-sized portions of alcohol given to me as far back as I can remember; free access to the family’s alcohol whenever I wanted, which was never. The point is, it wasn’t forbidden fruit. Drinking, being drunk, and alcoholism were discussed. I was given two cases of wine when I went to college (18) and told to call my parents when I ran out and needed more, which I did until I was 21 and could buy my own. Now in my 40s, I’ve been tipsy a few times, but never drunk to the point of throwing up, blacking out, or a hangover. My cousin, raised in another state with the forbidden-fruit model, is a severe alcoholic. Perhaps coincidence, but I can remember when she started drinking as a teen how exciting the concept was for her, and how grown-up it felt for her, where for me it was totally routine. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/37 "2016-06-08T21:45:48Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > I think kids get enough lessons at home from parents about the hazards of getting drunk, and there are certainly a crapload of parents out there unqualified to teach _anybody_ how to drink “safely”. Hell, for a crapload of parents, if they could drink ‘safely’. they wouldn’t even be parents! ---
**Author:** ![Belowjob2.0](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Belowjob2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belowjob2.0)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/38 "2016-06-08T22:55:28Z")
> [@RobDog](#): > > Of which European model do you speak? The one in this corner of Europe is “go to the town centre, drink as many two-for-one beers as you can, throw up, pick a fight”. > > This is not hyperbole. Instead of “European,” maybe “Mediterranean”, or" French"= would be more apt. We probably don’t want our kids drinking like Icelanders. Or Russians. ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2016, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/39 "2016-06-08T23:19:46Z")
One thought that I have, beyond trying or not trying alcohol, is simply educating them about how the process works. Specifically, I once had the opportunity to play with an alcohol simulator, which let you decide how to spread out your drinks over an evening, so that you got tipsy as fast as possible, stay in that nice fun zone through the evening, and don’t go over into falling down drunk/making an ass of yourself zone. And basically the takeaway of the simulator is that the way alcohol goes into and leaves our body is completely at odds with how we drink. We want to drink through the evening, socially, but that’s not how alcohol works. The simulator showed that if you slam down a bunch of drinks right as you start the evening, about an hour later, you’ll hit tipsy and largely stay that way for the rest of the evening. You could maybe add a few maintenance sips through the evening, but largely you’re done. Whereas, if you drink an ongoing set of single drinks through the evening, you’ll actually not be tipsy until quite a ways into it, and you’ll end the night in the bad zone. But in either case, it’s likely that most of what you’re getting out of the alcohol - as far as socializing goes - happens before the alcohol ever makes it to your brain. Alcohol lets people act silly as a social cue way before it forces them to do so. But anyways, knowing how to actually accomplish what you want with alcohol, and strategize your approach, could help. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2016, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825/40 "2016-06-09T01:13:59Z")
Instead of teaching kids how to get drunk, maybe we should be teaching them how to not give a fuck about popularity and being cool. [College binge drinkers enjoy higher social status relative to non-drinkers.](http://healthland.time.com/2012/08/20/why-college-binge-drinkers-are-happier-have-high-status/) From the article: > [@](#): > > "Binge drinking is a symbolic proxy for high status in college,” said study co-author Carolyn Hsu, an associate professor of sociology at Colgate University in a statement, noting that it’s what the wealthy, powerful and happy students on campus do. > > The study found that rich white frat boys reported having the greatest social satisfaction at school and were considered the big men on campus by others. They were not only happier than students in low-status groups — women, minorities and people who were less financially well-off — but also more likely to binge drink. “Binge drinking then becomes associated with high status and the ‘cool’ students on campus,” said Hsu. > > Low-status students in turn reported being happier if they binged than if they didn’t. Indeed, alcohol seemed to be the great social equalizer, bringing members of low-status groups to happiness levels similar to those of greater social power if they binged. “Students in all groups consistently liked college more when they participated in the campus’ binge drinking culture,” Hsu said. Since the study has not yet been subjected to peer review, its findings should be considered preliminary. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/should-we-teach-our-kids-how-to-get-drunk/756825.md?page=3)