# Shove your Christmas Letter right up your chimney **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 17, 2005, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084 "2005-12-17T19:20:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/21 "2005-12-17T20:08:23Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > And if this doesn’t qualify as the mundane details of your life, I don’t know what does. > > What **really** strikes me as self-involvement is when someone says, “I hate listening to the boring shit from your life–listen to the boring shit from mine!” > > Daniel Ah, I get it now **Daniel**. You’re a Letter _Sender_, aren’t you? 😃😃😃 ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/22 "2005-12-17T20:09:08Z")
> [@PunditLisa](#): > > Christmas letters are like fruitcake: they may be a tradition but NO ONE wants them. I don’t know about christmas letters, since there aren’t many of them sent here (apart for children) but I assume they must not be very different from New Year’s Eve letters. And I never ever received such a letter that included any bragging. Only best wishes for the year to come and such things. So, I always found them rather nice as a way to tell someone you keep him/her in your mind. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/23 "2005-12-17T20:09:12Z")
> [@lezlers](#): > > You send out these stupid things, don’t you? No. > [@](#): > > And your comparison is stupid. Now, if I were to print and mail out any MPSIMS thread I had started in the past year to everyone I know or have known in the past 10 years, _then_ you’d be onto something. And people that complained about it would still be pitiful, unless they don’t have recycling facilities in their town. The stupid mundane shit from your life is no more interesting than the stupid mundane shit from the life of that person who mistakenly considers **PunditLisa** a friend. The difference is, instead of reading your laments about your mom’s Christmas letters, I scrolled down past them, having determined that they were stupid mundane shit; I didn’t complain about it (except to point out what looks like hypocrisy to me). Daniel ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/24 "2005-12-17T20:10:17Z")
Thanks **Lezlers** for beating me to the punch by that…much. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/25 "2005-12-17T20:13:04Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > Thanks **Lezlers** for beating me to the punch by that…much. Given that you’re both wrong, don’t wear yourself out in thanks :). Truth is, I get about two letters a year. One is from a friend, who draws beautiful and hilarious letterhead for the letter and fills it with wry observations in the blandly sunny style that’s _de rigueur_ for the genre. The other is from an uncle whom I only get to see once a year, and it keeps me up to date on what’s going on with him, his wife, and their four awesome kids. I appreciate getting both of them; and if they sometimes brag, who cares? Why on earth would I let someone’s bragging get under my skin? I’m secure in who I am, I’m not a creature filled with envy and neurosis. I think that being such a creature is pitiful. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/26 "2005-12-17T20:15:35Z")
> [@lezlers](#): > > I can’t stand those ridiculous things. Assuming anyone gives a crap about the mundane details of your lives all year long is nothing but self-involvement at its best. > . Ok. Maybe my assumption in the previous post was wrong and Christmas letters don’t have anything to do with New Year’s eve letters. So, tell me about this custom. If I understand correctly, one sends a christmas letter to tell the recipient about events that took place during the year? At first glance, it seems rather neat. I think I would enjoy them if they were customary over here. Bragging included (I know of at least one relative who wouldn’t miss a chance to brag. That would be fine for a good laugh). ---
**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/27 "2005-12-17T20:18:50Z")
> [@Idlewild](#): > > I really like fruitcake. I am tired of hearing it derided just because the majority of substance produce in the US that goes by the name has no resemblance to the real, true tastiness of a good rich, moist chunk of homemade bliss. **Idlewild** , this post praising fruitcake is currently labeled as your post# 666. This is all the proof I need. Fruitcake is evil. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/28 "2005-12-17T20:21:56Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > Ok. Maybe my assumption in the previous post was wrong and Christmas letters don’t have anything to do with New Year’s eve letters. > > So, tell me about this custom. If I understand correctly, one sends a christmas letter to tell the recipient about events that took place during the year? You got it. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Brynda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Brynda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brynda)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/29 "2005-12-17T20:25:46Z")
I don’t get why people hate these. I appreciate the few I get from folks who I don’t see or hear from often and usually end up emailing them in response–“That trip sounded great. Glad things are going well” type of emails. I have found out about new babies, new jobs, moves, etc in this way. Obviously, these aren’t close friends, and it wouldn’t kill me not to hear, but I like hearing about what is going on. As for the fact that they seem like bragging, do you really think it would be appropriate to tell everyone sordid details? So what if it ends up being only the good stuff–who cares? I wonder if people who don’t like these feel threatened by the idea that someone else might be doing better, have a “better” life, better kids, whatever. Before you get started on me, I don’t send these. No kids, not enough news, etc really to send them. I just don’t see the harm in them. ---
**Author:** ![Rhubarb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/59ef9b/32.png) [@Rhubarb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhubarb)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/30 "2005-12-17T20:28:11Z")
I look at them as an exercise in creative writing. Virtually no one’s life is as rosy as these letters imply, but no one wants to put bad news in them. So it becomes a matter of updating your friends and family without letting a lot of harsh reality intrude into the picture. So they tell you that their son’s football team won the district championship, but they don’t mention that their waiting on a court date to defend him on methamphetamine possession charges. They tell you their husband got a new job, but not that he was fired for sexual harrassment and suspicion of embezzlement. While you may be uninterested in their achievements, you’d have to be some sort of ghoul to want to hear about their failures and misfortunes. This isn’t everything that happened to them this year, this is the BEST of what happened to them this year. It only sounds like bragging because they only want to share the good parts, especially with people they only keep in touch with via an annual Christmas letter. So I’d say I am pretty much in agreement with **LHoD**. If it’s from somebody you genuinely care about, it’s nice to get the update on their lives. If it’s someone you don’t much care for, or it’s just obnoxiously over the top glurge, then use the letters to line your cat’s litter box and draw little horns and goatees on their Christmas picture and tack it to the refrigerator. And be sure to send one back to them next year that’s even MORE over the top. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/31 "2005-12-17T20:37:49Z")
> [@PunditLisa](#): > > I got TWO of them today: the dreaded Christmas letter, or, a Brag Sheet disguised as a holiday greeting. > > Let me share an excerpt of one: > > “K received high honors for the first quarter…He was one of the few kids who played both offense and defense (on his football team)…In the summertime, he did a lot of pitching and had a batting average of .578 for the season…” > > "A was by far the cutest cheerleader out there…“I cannot believe how good she has gotten on the piano. I could listen to her play all day.” > > :rolleyes: > > And on and on it went. > > You know what? I don’t give a shit about your son’s batting average. I don’t care that your daughter has mastered a backflip. I know your type. You’re the one with the “My son is an honor student” sticker plastered on the back of your car. Yours is the van that is all decked out with streamers and paint because your 7 year old is going to the “state soccer championship.” The fact that there are 2,000 “state championships” does not defuse your enthusiasm. > > Newsflash: In all frankness, your kids aren’t special to ANYONE save yourself. The Star of David wasn’t shining in the sky the night your child was born. In case you didn’t notice, Christmas is supposed to be about the HUMBLE birth of Jesus Christ, not an occasion for you to crow about your child, aka the second coming. > > Listen, if I know you well, I already KNOW all about your life. If I don’t, then why the hell would you think I care that you took a fabulous vacation this year? > > Christmas letters are like fruitcake: they may be a tradition but NO ONE wants them. Why don’t you print the above rant and send it to everyone who sends you a Christmas letter? I bet that would go a long way towards solving your problem. ---
**Author:** ![Nic2004](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/4491bb/32.png) [@Nic2004](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nic2004)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/32 "2005-12-17T20:37:56Z")
> [@Revenant Threshold](#): > > You’re totally correct. I look forward to you posting your email address, so that we may all send our own letters - after all, you want to hear all about the successes of our lives over the past year, correct? There seems to be thousands of us - what joy you’ll have reading them! :rolleyes: You missed the part where I alluded to the idea that I don’t object to getting these from those who call me friend, and I them. I regret that at this time we are neither. And for the record, I have never sent this type of letter out but appreciate them from friends who are distant and have busy lives. Too often so busy it is difficult to maintain current contact of any degree with a host of friends. I do take great happiness in their successes and sorrow for their failures or losses. And yes, “what joy I’ll have” for anyone who has done well and is happy in their lives. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/33 "2005-12-17T20:39:10Z")
Ooooh, we just got one from my aunt and uncle. Now, he’s my mom’s older brother, my godfather, and we almost NEVER hear from them anymore. A little about their grandkids, which doesn’t bother me that much, considering we’re family and all. But most of it was about how Uncle and Aunt are starting a new business that will give them more money to go on vacation and how they’re out playing tennis and going boating and isn’t that just so nice and wonderful? No personal message (it was a homemade computer card, nice, fine, but it wasn’t even addressed to our names, nor was it signed, not even TYPED). Just a Brag Letter and a rather poorly photoshopped montage of their grandkids set against a rather shitty looking Christmas clip art background. Okay, Uncle’s Family, fine. You never call us. Not so much to wish anyone in the family happy birthday-your baby sister, your nieces, etc. Honestly, that doesn’t really bother me. Just because you’re family doesn’t mean you have to be close. But then don’t send us a goddamn form letter bragging about yourself. Don’t call up my grandmother asking about various family heirlooms (nothing valuable beyond sentiment) because you happened to see a similiar item getting a good chunk of change on eBay. It’s not the letters, or the pictures, I like hearing from various family members. It’s when they’re people we’re really not close to, who NEVER bothers to ask how we are, who have to send us a form letter just to show off. My father remember a little Christmas gag card his sister gave him, and suggested we send it in response: Money’s short Times are hard Here’s your fuckin’ Xmas card. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/34 "2005-12-17T20:40:47Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > Truth is, I get about two letters a year. One is from a friend, who draws beautiful and hilarious letterhead for the letter and fills it with wry observations in the blandly sunny style that’s _de rigueur_ for the genre. The other is from an uncle whom I only get to see once a year, and it keeps me up to date on what’s going on with him, his wife, and their four awesome kids. The thing is, many of the people who send out this type of shit are not in any way close to the people to whom they send it. Often, such newsletters—because that’s all they are—get sent to people who are not friends in any real sense of the word, and the newsletters serve as nothing more than a chance to blow their own trumpet. If i don’t have any contact whatsoever with someone for a whole year, then chances are that person is not someone i consider much of a friend. And if a person makes no attempt to contact me except in the form of an annual newsletter describing how great his or her family is, chance are that i will view the missive as little more than self-aggrandizing bullshit. Luckily none of my friends are so annoying. > [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > I appreciate getting both of them; and if they sometimes brag, who cares? Why on earth would I let someone’s bragging get under my skin? I’m secure in who I am, I’m not a creature filled with envy and neurosis. > > I think that being such a creature is pitiful. > > Daniel I hope you don’t suffer from vertigo, because that’s a pretty high horse you’re mounted on there. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/35 "2005-12-17T20:44:22Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > You are, hand to Og, the first person that I have heard NOT complain about Christmas letters. The sentiment I hear is usually that presented in the OP, if not much, much more bitter 😛 > > Luckily, my family doesn’t do this. A: We all don’t like each other enough to take the time to brag and B: Most don’t have much to brag about. > > Ah- Dysfunction! The TRUE meaning of the holidays! He’s the one _sending_ the Christmas letters! 😉 I don’t mind them if: 1. They’re well written 2. They cover topics of some importance or interest to the general public. For instance, I couldn’t care less about your daughter making the cheerleading squad. But if your husband went down to New Orleans for two weeks to help with the rebuilding, now THAT’S news. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/36 "2005-12-17T20:44:34Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > I hope you don’t suffer from vertigo, because that’s a pretty high horse you’re mounted on there. The hypocrisy just gets worse. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/37 "2005-12-17T20:45:53Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#): > > He’s the one _sending_ the Christmas letters! 😉 For fuck’s sake, dude. You’re the third person making this jab. I already pointed out that it’s incorrect. And it wasn’t an especially clever ad hominem the first time around. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/38 "2005-12-17T20:48:06Z")
I’m another one who had never understood the Christmas letter hate. First of all, I am Jewish and I have never sent any sort of Holiday card, let alone a Christmas letter or card in my life so I have never been responsible for such a thing. That said, I have always kind of liked them. If it’s from someone I know, I read it and am glad for the update. If it’s from someone I don’t know (like the cousin of my wife when I was married), I scan it and toss it in the trash. Throw the fucking things in the garbage unopened if they cause you that much angst. This time of year is bad enough without giving yourself the extra stress. Damn, and I thought that I was a bitter grouch. ---
**Author:** ![Amaranta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Amaranta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amaranta)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/39 "2005-12-17T20:48:36Z")
> [@Amazon Floozy Goddess](#): > > Maybe these “Christmas letters” are an American thing. I’ve never gotten such a letter as the ones described here; During the holidays I’ll get some cards from friends and family that say something like, “Hope you’re doing well; Been thinking of you; Have the best Xmas; etc…” Sometimes these are accompanied by small photos of themselves and/or family. I don’t mind these kinds of greetings at all. In fact I feel happy that they thought of me. I’m thinking the same thing. I’ve never received a Christmas letter, I’ve never heard anyone I know discuss this year’s Christmas letter. Most of my family lives on the West Coast, so we talk fairly often, and the only person who sends Christmas cards is my grandmother, who handmakes beautiful cards. No long winded message in them, though. A couple aunts, uncles, and cousins live in Manitoba, so we usually get a card from them - a generic, card-store card with a short message and maybe a picture of the smaller kids with Santa. None of this “My kid’s batting average!” stuff. Is this just an American thing? ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084/40 "2005-12-17T20:49:22Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > For fuck’s sake, dude. You’re the third person making this jab. I already pointed out that it’s incorrect. And it wasn’t an especially clever ad hominem the first time around. I think that Kalhoun is a chick and I am sure that she was joking. Calm down, homie. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shove-your-christmas-letter-right-up-your-chimney/336084.md?page=3)