# Shup up wiith the "shut up" already

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [July 7, 2018, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485 "2018-07-07T19:21:53Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![Crazy\_Canuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crazy_canuck/32/5282_2.png) [@Crazy\_Canuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crazy_Canuck)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2018, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/81 "2018-07-09T19:46:57Z")

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> [@madsircool](#):
>
> But can anyone claim that he isn’t completely sincere in what he writes?

Former and now banned doper Cesario wanted to fuck kids. He was very sincere about it. Does the fact that he was very sincere change anything?

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**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2018, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/82 "2018-07-09T21:33:17Z")

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> [@Shodan](#):
>
> Also - Concision of expression is usually a good thing.
> 
> Regards,  
> Shodan

FTR I just realized that Ring Lardner Jr kinda wrote one of my top 2 or 3 films of all time: M_A_S\*H.

Kinda because Robert Altman changed or improved a lot of the script.

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**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2018, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/83 "2018-07-09T21:43:22Z")

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> [@madsircool](#):
>
> I would understand this vitriol at a trolling sociopath like Morgenstern. But BigT? We all can’t be Noam Chomskys or William F Buckleys. But can anyone claim that he isn’t completely sincere in what he writes? Jesus Effing Christ. These boards are filled with damaged people who take advantage of the anonymity of these boards to interact with the wider world.

I’m debating whether to post a truly horrifying link to a thread **BigT** posted in all apparent sincerity, but it would be shitting on the memory of a departed Doper. Suffice it to say, being sincere doesn’t get him a pass on being a truly shitty human being.

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**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2018, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/84 "2018-07-09T22:23:55Z")

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> [@cochrane](#):
>
> I’m debating whether to post a truly horrifying link to a thread **BigT** posted in all apparent sincerity, but it would be shitting on the memory of a departed Doper. Suffice it to say, being sincere doesn’t get him a pass on being a truly shitty human being.

Post it! Post it! 😛

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**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2018, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/85 "2018-07-09T22:29:29Z")

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I’d like to help the OP, I really would. But every time I read one of that weenies posts my reaction can most accurately be summed up by the words, “oh shut the fuck up”.

Its not a bandwagon, or a gang thing, its not a meme or a dismissal, its simply an honest reaction to reading pompous drivel.

If he changed his name or re-regged as a new user and wrote some of that crap guess what my likely reaction would be? Correct. So it is not a BigT thing, its a dealing with weenies thing.

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**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2018, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/86 "2018-07-09T23:46:45Z")

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> [@iiandyiiii](#):
>
> I won’t chide anyone for doing what they want to do, but I don’t join into the attacks on **BigT** because many of them feel mean-spirited, and I think many of them greatly hurt his feelings, and IMO his faults don’t warrant that level of response (most of the time, anyway). Just my opinion.

I’m with you, for whatever that’s worth.

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**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/87 "2018-07-10T00:26:34Z")

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> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#):
>
> I’m with you, for whatever that’s worth.

Me too.

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**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/88 "2018-07-10T01:00:51Z")

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> [@Sunny\_Daze](#):
>
> Me too.

Me three.

There is a small but unfortunately very vocal contingent of posters who go after the low-hanging fruit. It’s not that BigT ever does anything that justifies such vitriol, it’s that he’s an easy target for the bullies to hit. So they spit their vitriol his way.

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**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/89 "2018-07-10T01:03:30Z")

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> [@Sunny\_Daze](#):
>
> Me too.

Me three (eta:four! ninja’d). I mean I understand how annoying he can be but 4-5 guys saying “stfu BigTard” every time just feels a little too meanspirited for a guy who’s mostly pretty harmless.

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**Author:** ![DSeid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dseid/32/20194_2.png) [@DSeid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSeid)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/90 "2018-07-10T01:42:07Z")

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> [@cochrane](#):
>
> … Shut the fuck up, **DShit**!
> 
> Excuse me, I need to get a drink.

That’s really the best an experienced Pitizen and Snarkpert like you can do? Come back after a few drinks if you are feeling more inspired.

> [@Crazy\_Canuck](#):
>
> Your lack of imagination doesn’t actually mean shit. Go try posting on 4chan and see how wrong you are. …

Huh. When **Blank Slate** asked us to imagine a conversation in “a social setting with several of your liberal friends” 4Chan somehow is not what I thought they were getting at. Indeed my imagination is limited and my social settings with friends does not include 4Chan. It does not include here either because even those of you whose posts I respect are not actually my friends.

> [@Helena330](#):
>
> **DSeid** , what on earth has _happened_ to you? Did your account get hacked?? You used to be someone I respected highly for your thoughtful, educated posts. In the last two months or so, you’ve become just another random jerk I’m considering putting on ignore to facilitate scrolling. ???

This is not meant to be snarky **Helena330** but why do you imagine I would care about your respect? I recognize your name but really cannot recall any of your posts or positions. And while that alone would result in your respect meaning nothing, the fact that you seem to endorse bullying behavior and find onlooker objection to it to be bothersome moves your respect into the less than nothing camp. I am more pleased to be not respected by people like that than to be respected by them.

Feel free to put me on ignore.

To engage though with some seriousness and dialing down the Pit tone … nothing has “happened” to me. Bullying though means something to me, both on the basis of childhood history, and by way of profession. And the bullying seen in schools and in teens by way of social media now extends to adults and in the political realm.

The principles are the same throughout.

First off what it is. And I cite some [expert opinion](http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/124/1/393.full?sid=aedd5aa5-8df2-4a58-9583-f29f3f95ea2a) here, in this case specific to children but it generalizes.

> [@](#):
>
> Bullying is a form of aggression in which 1 or more children repeatedly and intentionally intimidate, harass, or physically harm a victim who is perceived as unable to defend herself or himself.

So this op is not me bullying the lot of you. It is intentional to be sure, but it is not repeated over time, and if there is an imbalance of power I am on the short end of it.

OTOH does the intentional aggressive “shut up BigTard” by a group repeated over time aimed at someone who clearly is not of power, meet that definition? You tell me.

What do I as a pediatrician discuss with kids when we discuss bullying? That bullying, at all levels, involves more than the bully and the victim. The bystander, the onlooker, plays a critical role. In schools that means most importantly adults in the environment but both in schools and elsewhere it means all of us. It is very simple that when we as onlookers see bullying and look the other way or stay quiet we are complicit with it. We then share responsibility for it.

Speaking up in that context is not being a “white knight”; it is merely refusing to be placed in a position of guilt by inaction.

I would be a hypocrite of great measure if I advised that to kids who are taking real risk to the quality of their lives when they speak up (enough so that I think telling an on-site adult should be enough for most of them to take on), yet looked the other way when there isn’t even anything real on the line here.

IF what **BigT** was posting was racist or sexist or beating up on minority ethnicities or repetitively harassing someone who clearly at some power differential, then stating each time that such is being a jerk would not be bullying but would be standing up to bullying. Posting in a way that annoys some, even (_if_ so) being clueless and completely self-absorbed, aint that.

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**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/91 "2018-07-10T02:02:32Z")

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> [@iiandyiiii](#):
>
> I won’t chide anyone for doing wt they want to do, but I don’t join into the attacks on **BigT** because many of them feel mean-spirited, and I think many of them greatly hurt his feelings, and IMO his faults don’t warrant that level of response (most of the time, anyway). Just my opinion.

I agree with this.

I don’t care about hurting an asshole’s feelings. But for all his faults, **BigT** doesn’t strike me as an asshole. And I agree with **Manda JO** that it is unfair that he gets shot down with a canned one-liner while more obnoxious blowhards are challenged in a more respectful manner. At the very least, their intelligence isn’t impugned. I don’t agree with **BigT** on some stuff, but I do think he deserves that much.

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**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/92 "2018-07-10T02:04:55Z")

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“If there is no **BigT,** then I think we must invent one.”

Oscar Wilde.

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**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/93 "2018-07-10T02:35:11Z")

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> [@DSeid](#):
>
> I would be a hypocrite of great measure if I advised that to kids who are taking real risk to the quality of their lives when they speak up (enough so that I think telling an on-site adult should be enough for most of them to take on), yet looked the other way when there isn’t even anything real on the line here.

This is an interesting observation. Quite often adults preach and attempt to hold kids to a higher standard than themselves. Kids who are physically and verbally bullied or abused are told to restrain themselves, tell an adult, ignore it etc. Yet an adult would fight back. And adults supposedly have greater emotional and intellectual abilities.

So yes, if we want kids to deal with bullies then they need adult allies and it would be hypocritical if adults didn’t practice what they preach. The problem is the target of your comments are mentally ill. So not only will you not reach them you yourself will become an obsession to them.

Your name will go in a Lotus 1-2-3 snark spreadsheet and you will be harassed by mentally ill people who have far too much time on their hands. And unfortunately, you will never convince them that their behavior is immoral.

It is good that you recognize the problem and are making an effort to be productive. The world needs people willing to stand up to cyber bullies.

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**Author:** ![xenophon41](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xenophon41/32/253_2.png) [@xenophon41](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xenophon41)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/94 "2018-07-10T03:23:37Z")

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> [@Sunny\_Daze](#):
>
> Me too.

I’m already on record here, I think.

#yep

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**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/95 "2018-07-10T03:43:00Z")

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> [@monstro](#):
>
> I agree with this.
> 
> I don’t care about hurting an asshole’s feelings. But for all his faults, **BigT** doesn’t strike me as an asshole. And I agree with **Manda JO** that it is unfair that he gets shot down with a canned one-liner while more obnoxious blowhards are challenged in a more respectful manner. At the very least, their intelligence isn’t impugned. I don’t agree with **BigT** on some stuff, but I do think he deserves that much.

I’ll add my voice here, to nobody’s surprise. I’ve found myself uncomfortable when BigT joins my side in a debate sometimes, because he comes on so strong and often so unwilling to consider the other side; but that doesn’t mean the shit he gets is fair. Folks who get all indignant about their right to throw shit at him are pretty fuckin scummy in my opinion.

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**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/96 "2018-07-10T04:51:20Z")

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> [@DSeid](#):
>
> That’s really the best an experienced Pitizen and Snarkpert like you can do? Come back after a few drinks if you are feeling more inspired.

You become so butthurt at what you perceive as bullying that you call people pieces of shit for it. That’s the best you deserve.

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**Author:** ![DSeid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dseid/32/20194_2.png) [@DSeid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSeid)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 11:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/97 "2018-07-10T11:05:41Z")

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> [@Dallas\_Jones](#):
>
> “If there is no **BigT,** then I think we must invent one.”
> 
> Oscar Wilde.

Winston: Does the BigT exist?

O’Brien: That, Winston, you will never know. If we choose to set you free when we have finished with you, and if you live to be ninety years old, still you will never learn whether the answer to that question is Yes or No. As long as you live it will be an unsolved riddle in your mind.

- George Orwell - sort of.

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**Author:** ![DSeid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dseid/32/20194_2.png) [@DSeid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSeid)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/98 "2018-07-10T11:23:05Z")

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> [@cochrane](#):
>
> You become so butthurt at what you perceive as bullying that you call people pieces of shit for it. That’s the best you deserve.

It’s called empathy - I see human hemorrhoids and _my_ butt hurts. What can I say?

Now go away and play with the other widdle bullies.

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**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/99 "2018-07-10T11:23:31Z")

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> [@cochrane](#):
>
> You become so butthurt at what you perceive as bullying that you call people pieces of shit for it. That’s the best you deserve.

Also: in my nearly 20 years here, I don’t think I’ve once seen someone use “butthurt” and not be an asshole.

Coincidence?

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**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/shup-up-wiith-the-shut-up-already/817485/100 "2018-07-10T16:06:07Z")

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> [@DSeid](#):
>
> It’s called empathy - I see human hemorrhoids and _my_ butt hurts. What can I say?
> 
> Now go away and play with the other widdle bullies.

Go have intimate relations with the largest saguaro you can find.

> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#):
>
> Also: in my nearly 20 years here, I don’t think I’ve once seen someone use “butthurt” and not be an asshole.
> 
> Coincidence?

You, too.

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