# Signs of a Mid-Life Crisis... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 19, 2008, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443 "2008-11-19T13:49:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Sam\_I\_Am](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e495f1/32.png) [@Sam\_I\_Am](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_I_Am)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/41 "2008-11-24T04:30:14Z")
> [@kittenblue](#): > > Yes, you heard right. He has started “questioning his sexual orientation” and he is blaming Chantix, the stop-smoking drug, for these urges. Oh, and the bars he’s out drinking in are gay bars. Has he smoked for a long time? If so, I could kind of see it being an emotional defense mechanism. Maybe stopping smoking = facing issues he’d been avoiding until now. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/42 "2008-11-24T04:43:54Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > for years he bought plain, functional, cheap boring clothing from Walmart, etc Ouch!! HHelllooo? I’m sitting right here. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/43 "2008-11-24T04:59:59Z")
> [@kittenblue](#): > > Yes, you heard right. He has started “questioning his sexual orientation” and he is blaming Chantix, the stop-smoking drug, for these urges. Oh, and the bars he’s out drinking in are gay bars. > > His sister spent $2000 on trendy, Miami-hip clothes for him. Some of the t-shirts (or are they P-shirts?) have rhinestones on them. She doesn’t know about his “questioning”, but these styles are hot in Florida right now. He is actually afraid to wear it out to the gay bar…in Nebraska. I had my midlife crisis when I was about 19…unless that was the first wave. The sexual orientation thing was never an issue. Why is his sister buying clothes for him and spending big bucks? And rhinestones? Hmm, I would be quite afraid to wear them in the gay bars or anywhere else as well. This smells bad to me. ---
**Author:** ![CAT\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@CAT\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CAT_1)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/44 "2008-11-24T07:09:56Z")
A friends husband who was only about 35 started wearing puca shell necklaces and a TOE RING! He was not the toe ring type at all before that. It was a huge red flag, and yup, within a month or two of the toe ring, they were divorcing. He magically had a new girlfriend(age20ish) a few weeks later, that he swore he didn’t date before they were seperated. ---
**Author:** ![Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heffalump_and_roo/32/7691_2.png) [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heffalump_and_Roo)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/45 "2008-11-24T07:12:25Z")
Is it bad that this thread has me laughing? I am sorry if his behavior has caused any problems for the people around him. But seeing a shocked **WhyNot**. . .well, that’s just impressive. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/46 "2008-11-24T13:34:40Z")
> [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](#): > > But seeing a shocked **WhyNot**. . .well, that’s just impressive. _Sniff_ I am a delicate flower of womanhood, you know! 😃 No, seriously, denial on that level always makes me go _wah?!_. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/47 "2008-11-24T17:19:49Z")
Given the more salient details, I’d say his liking of trendy clothing is the least of his worries. Somehow I don’t think I would have highlighted that particular aspect of this situation. Hmm… ---
**Author:** ![Thylacine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thylacine/32/1143_2.png) [@Thylacine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thylacine)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/48 "2008-11-24T23:18:24Z")
My partner became suicidal on chantix, is it possible he became depressed on it, decided all was wrong and is now trying to turn his life upside down to get away from it? I would suggest that somebody suggest a visit to a therapist to figure out what is real and what is not given a known risk factor is in the mix. The gay bar scene is fun, my straight friends like coming along now and then and have been known in weak moments to wonder if they like it so much because they are gay or just because it is fun. Quitting smoking is a bitch emotionally in itself. There is a lot more going on than aging. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2008, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/49 "2008-11-24T23:44:50Z")
When I turned fifty it occured to me I had not had a midlife crisis. This became a topic of discussion around the pool one hot summer afternoon. A couple of friends and I had turned fifty. The squeeze and another friend were going to turn fifty in a few months. The result of this was, we all decided to go on a weeklong cruise to the Bahamas in October of that year. We named it our midlife crisis. We acted like fools aboard a bigass cruise ship for a week and got it all out of our system. Best way ever to have a midlife crisis. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![legalsnugs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/45deac/32.png) [@legalsnugs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/legalsnugs)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2008, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/50 "2008-11-25T15:56:27Z")
> [@kittenblue](#): > > Perhaps not inherently different…the pants all have two legs, the shirts have two sleeves…but he has suddenly developed a need for labels. And higher-end clothes than they can afford. And he’s wearing clothes that are designed for teenagers, not pudgy older men. Oh, and he’s thinking that maybe the Chantix her took to stop smoking is making him gay. And he’s started drinking in bars, something he’s never, ever done before. So like I said, more to the story, and quite a change for the whole family. Sweetie, unless you are with him _every_ _minute_ while he’s “drinking in (gay) bars,” you make him wear a condom every single time you guys have sex. Every single time. Don’t want to scare you or anything but you _really_ are not taking this seriously enough. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Carl\_Corey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Carl\_Corey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carl_Corey)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2008, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443/51 "2008-11-25T20:59:19Z")
**legalsnugs** , if the OP is talking about who I think she is (her ex-husband) I don’t think you have to worry. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/signs-of-a-mid-life-crisis/473443.md?page=2)