# Silliest Super Origin **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 9, 2004, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864 "2004-12-09T03:00:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/41 "2004-12-09T21:23:55Z")
> [@Superdude](#): > > Anyone remember [Slapstick](http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/slapstick.htm)? Ok, to be fair, Slapstick was a comedy character and his origin is SUPPOSED to be silly. Man, I miss Slapstick. I’d so buy a Slapstick/Speedball series. Maybe painted by Ross with covers by Mayhew or Horn. ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/42 "2004-12-09T22:13:03Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > Oh come now, people! > > Fortunately, my murdered parents were mega-millionaires allowing me to to study and become the world’s greatest detective, while training my body to athletic perfection. Now I can wear a bat costume and fight crime in memory of them. > > Perhaps we should change the topic to the **least** ridiculous origin. Actually, batman’s at least is plausible, even if somewhat improbable. I just want to know how they moved all that equipment into the batcave with just Bruce and Alfred. ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/43 "2004-12-09T22:15:05Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > Turns out that it only really works on red-haired people though In the mid-'80’s Bob Rozakis Hero Hotline miniseries introduced Stretch, a hero who had been using gingold long before Ralph Dibny and whose body had over time become more rubbery so he was in some sense a walking Tex Avery cartoon. IIRC he had grey hair that appeared to have formerly been black. –Cliffy ---
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/44 "2004-12-09T22:23:44Z")
> [@Already in Use](#): > > Well, come one, wasn’t the Legion of Super-Heroes pretty much ridiculous overall? Bouncing Boy? What the hell was that? Not to mention Matter-Eater Lad. Still, I would LOVE it if they produced a movie based on the Legion, precisely because it was so cheesy. Most of the Legino origins boiled down to “everyone on my planet has this power, and I’m the best one on my world at it” There were a few silly origins, but not overtly so. You have to realize that the Time Trapper was one of the Legion’s oldest foes. His first origin was that he was a Controller an offshoot of the Gaurdians, but that turned out to only be a game he was playing. The Time Trapper was this all powerful mysterious being and a really cool villain. And then they ruined it. > [@](#): > > Wasn’t there a retcon to the effect that this was not a coincidence? According to The Ambush Bug Guide to the DC Universe, a character named Mopey (IIRC) of the Heavely Helpmates sent both lightning bolts creating both Flashes. This story was quickly forgotten. ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/45 "2004-12-09T22:24:19Z")
> [@Yllaria](#): > > I vaguely remember a 3-D man. Didn’t he have 3-D glasses that were possessed by the ghost of his stunt man brother? So of course, when he wears them, they fuse and. . . Yes, 3-D Man was a Roy Thomas creation in either the early '80’s or late '70’s, although the strip was set in the '50’s. I know the 3-D Man was utilized in Kurt Busiek’s Avengers run of a couple years ago, although I don’t know what the scoop was. –Cliffy ---
**Author:** ![Cliffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@Cliffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cliffy)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/46 "2004-12-09T22:25:27Z")
> [@Already in Use](#): > > Well, come one, wasn’t the Legion of Super-Heroes pretty much ridiculous overall? Better not let **cmkeller** hear that kind of talk! –Cliffy ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/47 "2004-12-09T22:35:55Z")
Anyone remember “Dial H for Hero”? “Ooh! We found these super high-tech magic spy watches in an old lady’s attic! There’s a dial on them with four letters…H. E. R. O. Wonder what happens when we dial the word?!” Admittedly, it was a good CONCEPT: How do we have an ongoing short strip series about a multitude of superheroes without having to come up with a new backstory every month? But can’t we do better than “I found these super magic techno godlike spy watches in Old Lady Miller’s attic” as an origin? ---
**Author:** ![Sir\_Rhosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@Sir\_Rhosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_Rhosis)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/48 "2004-12-09T22:55:02Z")
Didn’t Ellison write one of the “Dial H” stories? Think I have it. Ya know, I’ve read a few cmics in my life, know most of the famous ones and a few obscure one, but… There really is a superhero named **The Whizzer**? You’re kidding me! What’s he do – piss faster than a speeding bullet? I bet the poor guy gets a lot of grief from his cooler-monikered superfriends. Sir Rhosis ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/49 "2004-12-09T23:12:24Z")
There’s at least 2 Whizzers, actually. Both at Marvel. (Well, 3, if you include the Squadron Sinister and Squadron Supreme versions as seperate characters.) There’s the one with the mongoose, the Golden Age version: [http://www.toonopedia.com/whizzer.htm](http://www.toonopedia.com/whizzer.htm) And the Silver Age version in the Squadron Sinister/Supreme: [http://www.hyperborea.org/flash/whizzer.html](http://www.hyperborea.org/flash/whizzer.html) ---
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/50 "2004-12-09T23:27:34Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Anyone remember “Dial H for Hero”? > > “Ooh! We found these super high-tech magic spy watches in an old lady’s attic! There’s a dial on them with four letters…H. E. R. O. Wonder what happens when we dial the word?!” > > Admittedly, it was a good CONCEPT: How do we have an ongoing short strip series about a multitude of superheroes without having to come up with a new backstory every month? But can’t we do better than “I found these super magic techno godlike spy watches in Old Lady Miller’s attic” as an origin? The first dial was found in a cave and had alien writing on it. The kid who found it could somehow read the writing and figured out which symbols spelled out “H-E-R-O”. He dialed “S-P-L-I-T” (IIRC) and became two seperate people. The good half created the new dials with only “H-E-R-O” in English and hid them away from his evil counterpart. Ok, not much better, but a little more detailed than “we just found them in my Aunt’s attic” ---
**Author:** ![Julius\_Henry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8797f3/32.png) [@Julius\_Henry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Julius_Henry)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/51 "2004-12-09T23:34:16Z")
Doesn’t anyone remember **Insect Queen**? Lana Lang casually walks by (or maybe she’s on her bike) an alien trapped under a tree. She lifts the tree enough for him to get out and he gives Lana a ring which allows her to turn into any insect of her choice once per day. Don’t know if there were more than the one story with her and her superpower, though. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/52 "2004-12-09T23:35:17Z")
Whoa…was Lana Lang the Henry Pym of the DCUniverse or what? ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2004, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/53 "2004-12-09T23:35:46Z")
I can’t believe we’re talking about silliest super-origins and nobody has mentioned the relationship between Barry Allen/Flash and [**Mopee,**](http://www.dcindexes.com/planet/planet4.htm) the _alien magician._ :eek: And I quote: > [@](#): > > According to Flash #167, that lightning bolt was originated by Mopee, initiate tenth class of the Heavenly Help-Mates. Apparently the superiors in the Heavenly Help-Mates had decided to gift an Earth man with super-speed, so they dispatched Mopee to deliver the gift. Mopee was something of a bumbler, whose appearance reminds me of Presto from the old Dungeons and Dragons cartoon. In sending the lightning bolt and gifting Barry with super-speed, he broke the rules. I dare you to top _that,_ fanboys! 😃 > [@Max Carnage](#): > > Man, I miss Slapstick. I’d so buy a Slapstick/Speedball series. Only if Slapstick can continue to one-up that !#@%$?!@ dipstick Speedball. (And nothing, but _nothing,_ will ever top the first time Slapstick met Ghost Rider for sheer comic book comedy… 😃 ) ---
**Author:** ![cbawlmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@cbawlmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cbawlmer)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/54 "2004-12-10T00:53:58Z")
The Golden Age Black Condor: IIRC, he crash-landed in the wilderness as an infant, Tarzan-style. His parents were killed, but he was found and raised by condors, who taught him how to fly. Mind over matter, I guess. When he grew up, he decided to go back to civilization and \*just happened \* to arrive in Washington, D.C. in time to witness a mob hit on a corrupt senator who \*just happened \* to look exactly like Black Condor! So BC quietly took over his life and Senate seat and fought crime in his spare time. ---
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/55 "2004-12-10T01:04:18Z")
> [@Julius Henry](#): > > Doesn’t anyone remember **Insect Queen**? Lana Lang casually walks by (or maybe she’s on her bike) an alien trapped under a tree. She lifts the tree enough for him to get out and he gives Lana a ring which allows her to turn into any insect of her choice once per day. Don’t know if there were more than the one story with her and her superpower, though. She had a few stories. In fact, she was an honorary member of the Legion of Super Heros. Later on, Lois Lane was known to have used the ring as well. > [@](#): > > I can’t believe we’re talking about silliest super-origins and nobody has mentioned the relationship between Barry Allen/Flash and Mopee, the alien magician. You need to go back a few posts. I did mention Mopee (but I spelled it wrong) ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/56 "2004-12-10T01:17:38Z")
So you did. But he still tops 'em all. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/57 "2004-12-10T01:22:16Z")
I may have some of the details wrong, but here it is. There was this guy. His name was James Wordsman or something, and he was the editor of some huge dictionary or encyclopedia for like 20 years. After spending 20 years editing dictionaries, he became really good at it. He developed as his super-power a superior command of the english language. In short, he became a really good talker. That’s it. That’s his origin. He called himself **The Word** and he started a cult as a highly charismatic leader. He was very persuasive. In fact, he persuaded his daughter that she was incredibly strong. He convinced her that she was a superhero (though she had no superpowers.) based on his his elocution she called herself **Ultima** and was able to go toe to toe, and blow for blow with the She-Hulk. The She-hulk eventually put him on trial for his crimes. This turned out to be an exceedingly bad idea, as once he was on the stand, **The Word** was able to use his command of the English language to convince the jury that he was innocent. Just for fun, we also taunted the She-Hulk into transforming and betraying he secret identity (he can talk anybody into anything.) In the ensuing battle Ultima was crippled, paralyzed. No big deal though, **The Word** talked to her about and convinced her that she was fine and then she was superpowerful again. Oddly enough, I think I knew this guy in real life. In High School I had this friend, Kevin who was so persuasive, not only did he score with his date during a doubledate that we went on, but he also convinced my date (who hated me) that I was a great guy and that she should have sex with me. I find **The Word** to be an ironic kind of supervillain. He’s also realistic. He gained abilities by studying hard. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/58 "2004-12-10T01:38:20Z")
> [@](#): > > Quote: > Originally Posted by Yllaria > I vaguely remember a 3-D man. Didn’t he have 3-D glasses that were possessed by the ghost of his stunt man brother? So of course, when he wears them, they fuse and. . . > Yes, 3-D Man was a Roy Thomas creation in either the early '80’s or late '70’s, although the strip was set in the '50’s. I know the 3-D Man was utilized in Kurt Busiek’s Avengers run of a couple years ago, although I don’t know what the scoop was. > > –Cliffy Roy Thomas didn’t create 3-D Man – Jack Kirby _did_ draw a 3-D man comic back in the 1950s (there’s a reproduction of the cover and a few pages in the book **Amazing 3-D**. I didn’t realize that Thomas had revived it, but if he did, he set it in the 1950s because that’s where it first appeared. The Kirby issue may have been a once-only, rather than series. Here’s an abscure and absurd origin – **The Man with the Chlordane Hands** from the comic **The Fly** (a serious superhero comic put out by the Archie Comics people, surprisingly, back in the 1960s). Chlordane was apparently an insecticide, kinda like DDT, and this professor accidentally spilled som on his hands. It turned them all purple and gave him the ability to kill insects by touching them. So, of course, he ends up trying to kill The Fly (A guy with the ability to fly, and one of the dumbest superhero ideas. There was a Fly Girl, too. I don’t know their origins.) , even though he’s not, technically, an insect. If I Recall Correctly, he didn’t really want to do it, but was being blackmailed, so the “death” was faked, and The Fly captured the bad guys. I don’t think TMWTCH ever showed up again. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/59 "2004-12-10T01:48:37Z")
> [@Scylla](#): > > Oddly enough, I think I knew this guy in real life. In High School I had this friend, Kevin who was so persuasive, not only did he score with his date during a doubledate that we went on, but he also convinced my date (who hated me) that I was a great guy and that she should have sex with me. **Scylla** , I thought I recognized you! -Superdude, whose secret identity is Kevin. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2004, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864/60 "2004-12-10T02:06:23Z")
Does anybody know the backstory on Braniac? I always did like [Braniac](http://www.starstore.com/acatalog/dc_braniac13-01.jpg) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/silliest-super-origin/278864.md?page=4)