# Simple thing you finally figured out that made you feel stupid **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 4, 2005, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805 "2005-06-04T00:00:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![FatBaldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@FatBaldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FatBaldGuy)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2005, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/241 "2005-06-13T15:27:05Z")
> [@TV time](#): > > As we sat in the audience listening to the director talk about Ann Tig O Knee, we got to wondering if the director had decided to go with a different play than the original Anti Gone. Unfortunately we asked A former cow-orker told me the story of her brother, who had been in several amateur theatrical productions, including _Les Miserables_. Once he was interviewed for the local newspaper, and the reporter wrote that he had appeared in _Lame Is Rob_. ---
**Author:** ![Cub\_Mistress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea666f/32.png) [@Cub\_Mistress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cub_Mistress)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2005, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/242 "2005-06-13T15:52:26Z")
Persephone is Per-sa- phone (as in the phone you call me on) in my mind. I have to stop and correct myself (in my head), at least 25% of the time. In my defense, I had heard someone say it that way. Apparently, they knew no more than I did. Still, it was tough learning the correct pronunciation in front of a class I was teaching!!! :o :o ---
**Author:** ![Can\_Handle\_the\_Truth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Can\_Handle\_the\_Truth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Can_Handle_the_Truth)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/243 "2005-07-19T22:24:34Z")
Imagine the howls of laughter I got when I happened to mention Don Kwickset, the crazy spanish gentleman… ---
**Author:** ![lizardling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f4b2a3/32.png) [@lizardling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lizardling)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/244 "2005-07-19T22:58:16Z")
> [@elfkin477](#): > > I see this word spelled wrong more often than right. (Because I work with student writing). And I totally don’t get it. Kids can spell “may” and kids can spell “bee” and “bye” too, and those who have read Romeo and Juliet know about “mab” as well. I’d expect to see “maybee” but how do you get to mabye? that’d be like Queen Mab with a bye stuck on the end. Mab-(b)ye. I’m not very good at sounding words out, but that’s obvious even to me. 😕 Are the students’ papers handwritten or typed? When I misspell ‘maybe’, it’s generally because I’m typing too fast and my fingers tangle up. Maybe some of that could be due to sloppy typing skills. ---
**Author:** ![lizardling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f4b2a3/32.png) [@lizardling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lizardling)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/245 "2005-07-19T23:00:21Z")
> [@jellyblue](#): > > You would probably have a fascinating Rorschach! Ha! I had the same thing going for the longest time when I was young. Until one day I was staring at it and something _shifted_ in my brain. “Oooooh. So _THAT’S_ what it is. An eagle.” ---
**Author:** ![dearissues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/919ad9/32.png) [@dearissues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dearissues)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/246 "2005-07-19T23:05:45Z")
> [@Nicodemus2004](#): > > Dirty Deeds done to sheep!! Dirty deeds to Dungarees! Glad to know I’m not the only one. ---
**Author:** ![BwanaBob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bwanabob/32/2985_2.png) [@BwanaBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BwanaBob)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/247 "2005-07-20T12:04:35Z")
> [@Anne Neville](#): > > Here in California, that’s not necessarily true. I take 680 South and 580 East to get to work. The even-odd rule only applies to two-digit interstates. There’s a rhyme and reason to three-digit ones as well, but it’s early and I haven’t had coffee yet… ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/248 "2005-07-20T12:35:43Z")
I owned a car (for six years) that had electric wing mirrors. Just next to the switchgear that adjusted the mirrors was a little button (and I mean little). When I pressed it, a little light lit up green next to it. It didn’t go out on a second press of the button, but in its own good time. Six cold and frosty winters later, I found out that the mirrors had built-in de-icers. ---
**Author:** ![bluecanary](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bluecanary/32/3614_2.png) [@bluecanary](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bluecanary)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/249 "2005-07-20T12:49:52Z")
_awry_ is not pronounced awe-ree, it is pronounced a-rye. ---
**Author:** ![Winnie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e480ec/32.png) [@Winnie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winnie)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/250 "2005-07-20T13:07:45Z")
> [@bluecanary](#): > > _awry_ is not pronounced awe-ree, it is pronounced a-rye. Yup. Did this for YEARS sounding like a backwoods hillbilly until I heard it in a movie and realized I’d been saying it wrong. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_chao_goes_mu/32/3191_2.png) [@The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Chao_Goes_Mu)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/251 "2005-07-20T13:45:44Z")
> [@Anne Neville](#): > > Here in California, that’s not necessarily true. I take 680 South and 580 East to get to work. Interstates with 3 numbers circumnavigate a city and connect to the areas north/south east/west interstates. What? You didn’t know that? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/252 "2005-07-20T13:56:30Z")
Got two uv’em: Thanks to SDMB I know better understand the word “martial.” I always known, of course, that it had something to do with fighting. It wasn’t until this thread which linked to this Mark Twain article. Twain uses “martial” in a phrase other than “martial arts” and the light bulb went on: “Martial, relating to Mars, the god of war! Ding!” (not so bad, I guess) * * * I live near Windsor ON - have for the last 5-6 years. Since 1858 a brand of whiskey has been produced here called Canadian Club (heard of it?) by a company called Hiram Walker & Sons Ltd. Mrs. Call works for the company that owns Hiram Walker & Sons Ltd. When we car pooled I dropped her off at the Walker building at the Hiram Walker & Sons complex. I then proceeded down Walker Rd. (a major local road which ends at the Hiram Walker complex). Walker Rd. runs through Walkerville. You’d think I would have realized that Walker Rd. is named after Hiram Walker? No, not until I was giving the tour of Windsor to some visiting relatives did the light come on, and to compound my foolishness I actually said, “Hey, I bet that Walker Rd. was named after Hiram Walker” much to the mirth and merriment of my passengers. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_chao_goes_mu/32/3191_2.png) [@The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Chao_Goes_Mu)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/253 "2005-07-20T15:05:19Z")
My partner and I make frequent trips to Buffalo, NY to visit her family. Every trip I noticed these signs on the Interstate that were blue with a huge white question mark on them. I remained quiet for several trips, desperately trying to figure out what they meant but to no avail. Finally, on one of the trips, I broke down and asked her what the hell the question mark was about. She stared at me for several seconds, just blinking. Then she asks if I’m serious. I tell her I am. She rolls her eyes and tells me that they mean “Information” I felt like I was hit in the face with a frying pan. DUH!!! For the record, I think the signs are dumb. I think about one mile after the question mark sign they should erect a sign with an exclamation point. ---
**Author:** ![EllaBean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a5b964/32.png) [@EllaBean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EllaBean)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/254 "2005-07-20T15:50:40Z")
one from my younger sister: we were walking one day and talking about painters… I’m not sure how it came up, but she said something about how hard it must have been for Michelangelo to paint the “Sixteenth Chapel” and one from me: In the movie “Forrest Gump” when Forrest is on The Late Show or The Tonight Show or whatever interviewing-celebrities-with-a-guy-behind-a-desk show it was with John Lennon. They were talking about China or Vietnam and Forrest says (roughly) “well, they don’t have anything!” to which John replies “no posessions?” “yeah. and they don’t go to church!” “no religion, too?” It wasn’t until maybe two months ago that I was listening to the song, “Imagine” and recognized the funny phrasing (“no religion too”) and went :smack: > [@nyctea scandiaca](#): > > Oh here’s a good one! I have felt stupid for years because of this… > > I dated a guy in college named Chris. But a lot of people called him “Topher.” I couldn’t figure out why, so one day I asked him. He said, with a laugh, “it’s because I like tofu!” And I was like, ohhhh-kaaay?! :dubious: > > It wasn’t until years later that I figured it out; it hit me like a ton of bricks… > > Chris **TOPHER**!!! > > DUH! :smack: :smack: :smack: I have a friend named Jennifer who referred to herself as “Nifer” or “Nif” a lot. I never really thought about it until I told someone her name and changed my mind halfway through because I couldn’t remember if she preferred to be called “Jen” or “Jennifer”. “her name is Jen… nifer… OH!” > [@panache45](#): > > I was well into college before I found out that women don’t pee through their vaginas. > > And I’ve recently discovered (on this board) that there are a whole lot of women who think they do. wait… we DON’T? what do they call that thing, then? > [@Taber](#): > > epi-tome is apparently pronounced epi-to-me. who knew? > > everyone besides me I would have gone through life thinking it was pronounced ee-PIE-tome had I not been reading aloud the first time encountered it. My parents still say it that way just to make fun of me. I WAS SEVEN YEARS OLD! LET UP ALREADY! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/255 "2005-07-20T23:24:49Z")
> [@BiblioCat](#): > > You know that dumb kid’s joke, “How do you get down from an elephant? You don’t get down from an elephant, you get down from a duck!” > For years, I just didn’t get it. I just didn’t make the “down” connection. I kept wondering how you would get down off of the elephant’s back. :smack: > Then one day in high school, as I was putting on my _down_ vest, it finally hit me. > It was like a light bulb went on. “Oooooh, I get it!” I felt like such a moron. LOL. It took me years to figure that joke out too. I actually had someone explain it to me once, then FORGOT the explanation, so I went several years knowing that I used to get it, but not getting it. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/256 "2005-07-21T02:17:18Z")
> [@EllaBean](#): > > In the movie “Forrest Gump” when Forrest is on The Late Show or The Tonight Show or whatever interviewing-celebrities-with-a-guy-behind-a-desk show it was with John Lennon. Dick Cavett. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/257 "2005-07-21T03:48:12Z")
> [@EllaBean](#): > > wait… we DON’T? what do they call that thing, then? Urine comes out the urethra, which is located above the vaginal opening, and below the clitoris. ---
**Author:** ![glilly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/48db29/32.png) [@glilly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glilly)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/258 "2005-07-22T02:39:32Z")
I thought people had **a stigmatism**. I thought perhaps you could have **two stigmatisms**. Until I finally saw it in print and laughed at how it was misspelled. For about two seconds. Then :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Amaranta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Amaranta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amaranta)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/259 "2005-07-22T02:52:32Z")
> [@glilly](#): > > I thought people had **a stigmatism**. I thought perhaps you could have **two stigmatisms**. Until I finally saw it in print and laughed at how it was misspelled. For about two seconds. Then :smack: Oh, thank Pete I’m not the only one. I thought a stigmatism was like, I dunno, something on your cornea or something, like a bump. C’mon, really, how often does it come up? A friend of mine has astigmatism, and she was complaining about astigmatism and contact lenses. Convo goes: Me: “Yah, that would suck, can they ever get rid of it, like remove it?” Her: “Remove what? My eyeball?” Me: “No… the stigmatism” Her: “What?” Me: “What?” Her: “It’s ASTIGMATISM. One word.” Me: “Ooooooh.” Luckily, she forgot about the conversation and has never mentioned it again. I felt like the biggest idiot on the planet. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2005, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/260 "2005-07-22T07:13:16Z")
When I was first learning about wine, I was at a business dinner and the host asked if we would like a good **Burgundy**. I told him that no, I preferred red. :smack: My mispronunciations are too numerous to begin. (Did you know there is a “t” at the end of “across”, and an “n” in might? Ouch.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805.md?page=14)