# Simple thing you finally figured out that made you feel stupid **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 4, 2005, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805 "2005-06-04T00:00:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/141 "2005-06-08T06:54:40Z")
> [@Nicodemus2004](#): > > Dirty Deeds done to sheep!! Dirty deeds, Thunder Chief! Duh! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Hoops](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoops/32/6408_2.png) [@Hoops](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoops)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/142 "2005-06-08T09:19:12Z")
Right on the [front page](http://www.straightdope.com/) of our own Straight Dope website–you do look at the front page from time to time, yes?–there is a link called Weird Earl’s. It is updated regularly and always points to an unusual or bizarre webpage, nominated by Dopers. I never gave the title much thought, assuming that it was meant to give the impression of a peculiar establishment run by a guy named Weird Earl. I have been seeing and using this link for years. Am I the only one who didn’t notice until recently that the reason it is named Weird Earl’s is: (if you don’t know what I’m about to reveal, consider thinking about it before reading the spoiler) it’s a pun. Unusual or bizarre websites are weird URLs. I wonder who came up with that one? Hats off to them! ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/143 "2005-06-08T15:15:54Z")
> [@Only Mostly Dead](#): > > “Caniggit” is a phoenetic attempt at “knight.” IIRC, “caniggit” is actually the original old-English (Saxon?) pronunciation of the word, which Terry Jones, as a well-read lay historian of the period, would have known. The “nite” pronunciation came after the spelling was established, apparently. One of our better-informed Dopers can either confirm or contradict my recollection. ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/144 "2005-06-08T17:18:23Z")
Recently we went on a cruise. When we arrived onboard and were shown our cabin, we were delighted to discover that we had been upgraded from an ordinary outside cabin, with just a window, to one with a balcony. The shipping company’s website and literature did mention the possibility of an upgrade so we weren’t completely surprised. Why do they do this? Simple. Because they know that once you’ve cruised with a balcony cabin, you’ll never go back. The fiends! ---
**Author:** ![Montgomery\_Burns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/db5fbb/32.png) [@Montgomery\_Burns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montgomery_Burns)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/145 "2005-06-08T17:27:19Z")
> [@dinahmoe](#): > > Just realized today that the dog and cat in “Get Fuzzy”? Satchel and Bucky? Satchel Paige and Bucky (F’ing!) Dent. Not a smart girl, here. I guess I don’t see why anyone would feel stupid about not knowing who the dog and cat are named after. Is there something in the comic strip that I’m missing that makes this obvious? ---
**Author:** ![Corner\_Case](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/corner_case/32/234_2.png) [@Corner\_Case](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corner_Case)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/146 "2005-06-08T19:06:28Z")
I installed some remote controls for the ceiling fan and its light. All the installations would work just fine. Then one day, a week later, or a month later, I would press the light button on the remote and the light would turn on but be quite dim. I used a meter to check the power input and determined that it was okay. So the remote installed in the ceiling must have gone bad. I replaced it. Other remotes would have the same problem. I replaced them, sometimes with the same model, sometimes with another. After three of these replacements, one of the replacements had the problem. What was going on here? I couldn’t figure it out. Then one day, in exasperation I pointed the remote at the light and pressed **and held** the button! The light dimmed slowly from full to off. A light dawned in my head. I pressed **and held** the button again. The light came on dim and slowly brightened to full power. :wally Well, the other buttons were Lo, Med, and Hi for the fan! Why should the light have a press-to-dim/lighten feature? Okay, I read the box after the fact and it did say it had a dimmer for the light. I just didn’t need it so never bothered to learn what it meant. The kids must have played with the remotes. Oh, and I have a BS in Electrical Engineering and program computers for a living. :o ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/147 "2005-06-08T22:23:02Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > IIRC, “caniggit” is actually the original old-English (Saxon?) pronunciation of the word, which Terry Jones, as a well-read lay historian of the period, would have known. The “nite” pronunciation came after the spelling was established, apparently. One of our better-informed Dopers can either confirm or contradict my recollection. On-line sources seem to say that it comes from the Saxon _cniht_ which seems to contain no gs. “Caniggit” seems suspect, especially when there are so many other -ight words in English. Unless I’m being whooshed. 😛 It look me months and someone’s else’s counsel to figure out that I didn’t have to use my key to lock the driver’s side door of my car. I could just hold up the handle while pressing down the lock. ---
**Author:** ![Izzybella](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e56c9b/32.png) [@Izzybella](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Izzybella)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/148 "2005-06-08T22:23:34Z")
When watching the film “The Wedding Singer” I commented to my friend that the guy playing Billy Idol was crap and didn’t even look like Billy Idol. We stayed for the credits only to find that Billy Idol played himself. I felt pretty stupid. On the misunderstood lyrics front, my dad used to listen to country music when I was a kid. I heard: You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille. Four-hundred kids, and I’m feedin 'em oatmeal. And about 3 years ago, I was telling my sister that something was super-flow-is instead of
um
er
superfluous. She looked at me in confusion, realized what I meant to say, corrected me, and then mocked me senseless for the rest of the day. ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/149 "2005-06-08T22:36:13Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > On-line sources seem to say that it comes from the Saxon _cniht_ which seems to contain no gs. “Caniggit” seems suspect, especially when there are so many other -ight words in English. > > Unless I’m being whooshed. 😛 > . You’re not being whooshed. In Old English (~400 to 1100CE) writing, _h_ at the end of a syllable was pronounced much like _ch_ in modern German words like _nicht_ and _ich_. The _g_ preceding the _h_ wasn’t written until hundreds of years later during the Middle English period. Not long after, people stopped pronouncing the “ich-laut” but kept the spelling. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/150 "2005-06-08T22:49:39Z")
> [@Misnomer](#): > > I have lived in this house for 26 months. It took 24 of those months for me to discover that the ceiling fan in the master bedroom has more than one speed. :smack: > > Holy crap: not only is the alliteration good, the meter is great, too (especially “manlier men for miles around”)! Well done! 🙂 ::applause:: So it took me two years to discover I had under cabinet lighting in the kitchen. :eek: :eek: ---
**Author:** ![N.Sane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f19dbf/32.png) [@N.Sane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/N.Sane)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/151 "2005-06-08T22:53:08Z")
I’m a voracious reader, and have an extensive vocabulary. I think by now, at 41, I’ve learned the pronunciation of most of those words. But I remember saying something to my grandmother once about my A-chilies heel. She stared at me in bewilderment, and then broke out in laughter whilst telling me that it was pronounced ah-kill-ees. I also used to think that a ga-ze-bo was pronounced gaze-bo. I thought it sounded peculiar, but what the hey, right? And Izzybella forgot to tell you that she devoured the Sweet Valley High books when she was a young teenager. She made a comment once about what a funny last name Jessica and Elizabeth have: wak-a-field. It was my turn to stare at her in bewilderment and break out in laughter whilst telling her that it was pronounced wake-field. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/152 "2005-06-08T22:53:41Z")
> [@Mr. Blue Sky](#): > > Topher Grace was on some show recently and the host (Letterman? Leno?) asked him about his name and he said it was short for Christopher. I’d always wondered what the heck kind of name Topher was. and Ving Rhames is short for
I R V I N G ! ! ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/153 "2005-06-08T22:54:47Z")
> [@Baraqiyal](#): > > I react with 😕 "I’m sorry, but I don’t have a compass. Can you just tell me in left and right?” They would give an uncomfortable laugh, as if to say, “I’m sure you were making a joke, but it wasn’t very funny”. I don’t know how you people do it. Well, it’s because you know that certain places are to the north, east, south, and west of wherever you are. For example, I know from looking at a map that Saint-Henri is west of downtown and the Village is east. Laval is north and the river is south.\* So when someone tells me to go east on RenĂ©-LĂ©vesque, it means go towards the Village. If I then have to turn north, it’s obvious I need to go left, since I was going east before. Does that help? \*for the purposes of this discussion, we will ignore Montreal north. Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/154 "2005-06-08T22:58:23Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > I was well into college before I found out that women don’t pee through their vaginas. > > And I’ve recently discovered (on this board) that there are a whole lot of women who think they do. So, when we learned about sex in the fourth grade, I couldn’t figure how a flaccid penis could fit in a vagina. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/155 "2005-06-08T23:00:30Z")
> [@Zeldar](#): > > Right after college I had a job as an announcer at an FM station playing jazz music and such things. Having never heard or seen the word “segue” before, I introduced _Seque In C_ (by the Basie or Ellington band IIRC) as if it it were **Seeg** and went happily on my way. > > It was years later and in a situation I can’t recall specifics about, when I heard someone say **Seg-Way** and it suddenly dawned on me what I had done before. > > Imagine blushing with embarrassment years after the fact! Yuck yuck everyone knows segue is pronounced seg gew! ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/156 "2005-06-08T23:04:59Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > Another one I might as well admit to, as it occurred here, was the fact that I thought Del Shannon the singer was the same person as Dell Shannon the author. I guess I just assumed the after “Runaway” dropped off the charts and his musical career faded, he picked up a pen and began writing mysteries. As several people pointed out, Del (aka Charles Westover) was no relation to Dell (aka Elizabeth Linington). At least nobody tried to claim it should have been obvious because everybody knows Del’s a boy’s name and Dell’s a girl’s name. So I watched a TV special about Jimmy Rodgers and was surprised they didn’t mention the pork sausages. Jimmy dean was the guy who died on the motorcycle, wasn’t he? ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/157 "2005-06-08T23:07:47Z")
and there was the time I said disassemble meant to lie!! :smack: No!! that was the president!! :wally ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/158 "2005-06-08T23:15:58Z")
> [@missbunny](#): > > I thought until a few years ago that “To Be Announced” was a PBS TV show. It seemed like whenever I saw it in the TV guide, it was under a listing for a PBS station so I thought it was some kind of panel show. > > Well it sounds like a panel show, doesn’t it? I thought it was something about current events and the whole point was that you didn’t know exactly what they’d be discussing until you tuned in. They’d based it on whatever was in the news that week. > > I only realized I was mistaken when I got digital cable 3 years ago and saw “To Be Announced” sometimes listed for every single channel. Doesn’t TBA stand for The Basketball Association\> 😕 ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/159 "2005-06-08T23:20:42Z")
> [@Girl From Mars](#): > > A surprising number of guys don’t know this, I’ve mentioned it as a joke before (women having 3 holes) to completely blank looks and the need for explaination. > > My pathetic confession is that for years I thought it was ‘Duck’ Tape. You know, for tying up pesky ducks to keep them under control
 Guess what!! Duct tape was once called duck tape. [From DuctTapeGuys.com](http://www.octanecreative.com/ducttape/DT101/) I guess we know about as much as anyone about duct tape origins - so we’ve become the “experts,” or the conveyors of folk lore - as the case may be. It was actually rather hard to find anyone to admit to the actual invention of duct tape. The closest we got to a consistent story was the Johnson and Johnson Permacel Division who made the stuff for the U.S. Military during World War II. The original use was to keep the moisture out of the ammunition cases. Because it was waterproof, people referred to the tape as “Duck Tape.” Also, the tape was made using cotton duck - similar to what was used in their cloth medical tapes. Military personnel quickly discovered that the tape was very versatile and used it to fix their guns, jeeps, aircraft, etc. After the war, the tape was used in the booming housing industry to connect heating and air conditioning duct work together. Soon, the color was changed from Army green to silver to match the ductwork and people started to refer to duck tape as “Duct Tape.” (By the way, “Duck Tape” is now a registered trademark of Duck¼ brand (a division of Henkel Consumer Adhesives) in Avon, Ohio ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2005, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805/160 "2005-06-08T23:41:11Z")
One time in college I went to my first jazz show with a couple people and after a few “songs” I leaned forward and whispered to me friend: “It sounds like they’re just making it up as they go along!” Yeah, I still blush over that one. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simple-thing-you-finally-figured-out-that-made-you-feel-stupid/306805.md?page=9)