# Simpsons: "Bombardment" not "Dodgeball." Is "dodgeball" a trademark or something? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [February 27, 2006, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359 "2006-02-27T20:09:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359/41 "2006-02-28T19:18:33Z")
> [@stuyguy](#): > > On yesterday’s Simpsons episode the new gym teacher is a masochistic drill seargant type who loves to abuse the kids by playing “Bombardment” – a game that any fool can instantly see is nothing but dodgeball. I’m not just _any_ fool.😉 The game is called Bombardment, and only sissys play it with rubber school [balls!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=294613&highlight=dodgeball) ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359/42 "2006-02-28T19:23:35Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > You’d get from three to a billion people all in a group near a wall (preferably brick) and one person would throw a tennis ball as hard as they could at the wall. At a different school, I learned this game was called “Suicide” though it wasn’t about accumulating strikes. If a player dropped the ball or threw and didn’t reach the wall (as might happen if he’d tried to throw it the length of the playground after a previous player had gotten off a really hard throw with a long rebound), he’d have to run to touch the wall before another player could grab the ball and throw it at _him_. Naturally, this made for quick decisions, since a straight run would get you to the wall faster, but a zig-zag made you a harder target. The worst, of course, was to be mere steps from the wall and feeling the hard “thwack” of a tennis ball nailing you between the shoulderblades or on the back of the head. I forget under what circumstances a player would have to stand by the wall and take a free shot, but it was a highlight of the game, to be sure. ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359/43 "2006-02-28T19:30:00Z")
We played Bombardment in high school, almost exactly as **Cleophus** described, but for three slight variations. First, there was no time limit on holding the ball. Second, shots to the head resulted in the thrower being called out. And third, once it was down to a single man on one side, the players on the other team could cross the center line to move in for the kill. Since our school had a swimming pool (albeit a decrepit one), we also played a game called Jungleball, which was like a no-hold-barred version of water polo. I still don’t know why nobody ever drowned because we played pretty rough. During my early grade school years (on Army bases in Germany) we had three basic “non-regulation” games. 1. The standard, run-of-the-mill Dodgeball. 2. Army Dodgeball. Two throwers, everyone else in the middle. The penalty for being hit depended on where you got hit. Head or torso was fatal. A limb shot resulted in the loss of the limb. Lost arms had to stay behind one’s back. Lost legs could not be used for walking or ever supporting one’s weight (hop hop hop). 3. Smear The Queer (Kill the Man With The Ball). Like **toadspittle** , we had no idea of the politically incorrect meaning of the phrase…it was just what the game was called. We were first and second graders growing up in the Army during the late 70s. Not exactly the environment for inculcating a healthy respect for alternative lifestyles. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![MrSquishy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9e5f3/32.png) [@MrSquishy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrSquishy)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359/44 "2006-02-28T19:39:34Z")
We called it murder ball too. I wonder if that’s a Canadian thing. I bet they don’t call it that any more. In fact, I wonder if they even play it any more. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359/45 "2006-02-28T20:22:58Z")
> [@Sublight](#): > > Kill the Man with the Ball - Recess only, and the teachers would stop us whenever they caught us playing it. Essentially it was rugby with no goal, and teams divided into “whoever has the ball” vs. “everyone else.” Strangely, we all tried to get the ball. That’s a game we charmingly called “Smear the Queer”. I don’t think any of us thought the word “queer” meant homosexual, I never heard anyone using queer to mean gay at that time. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359/46 "2006-02-28T20:23:34Z")
Huh. When I was a kid, “Dodgeball” (also known as “Scatter Dodge”) had no teams. Usually, there was only one ball (one of the red rubber things), and it was usually played on a basketball court (indoors; one would lose balls easily outdoors). At the beginning of the game, everyone but one person started off against a wall. The last person started in the middle, threw the ball as hard as he could at the wall above everyone’s heads for a good rebound, and yelled “Scatter Dodge”. At this point, it was just your standard Dodgeball there-can-be-only-one general melee: If you got the ball, you threw it at someone, if they caught it, you were out, and if it touched them without them catching it, they were out. No body part was completely off-limits, though aiming for the head was a no-no (this being a judgement call of the responsible adults present, since many of us had bad aim). Once out, you never got back in. I can’t remember if you were allowed to move with the ball, but I don’t think so. Once it got down to about 5 people left, it went to half-court, with all of the out people forming a human wall down the middle of the court. We didn’t have any interesting house rules for dodgeball, but in kickball (which we played with the same ball in the same court) if you hit the opposite basketball backboard on your kick, it was an automatic home run, and if you got it through the basket, it was a home run plus five extra points (this happened about once every year or two). ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359/47 "2006-02-28T21:48:48Z")
> [@Bryan Ekers](#): > > Were there… bible questions involved? The “bombardment” plot in this most recent episode actually helped me understand the joke in this classic _Simpsons_ episode. Bart and Lisa perk up when they hear Ned say they’re going to play Bombardment because they think they’re going to play a dodgeball game. But that’s not the full name of the game! Hah! ---
**Author:** ![Edward\_The\_Head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ce73a5/32.png) [@Edward\_The\_Head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Edward_The_Head)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2006, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359/48 "2006-02-28T23:45:48Z")
Did anyone else call this Greek Dodge or were we the only middle school that called it that? This would have been the mid 80s. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-bombardment-not-dodgeball-is-dodgeball-a-trademark-or-something/346359.md?page=2)