# Simpsons non-recurring-character lines **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 23, 2003, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768 "2003-11-23T01:55:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/1 "2003-11-23T01:55:45Z")
We’ve had several recent CS threads on favorite lines spoken on _The Simpsons_ by Homer, Bart, Marge and Lisa. But some of the most memorable lines in the show were not spoken by any recurring character. Here’s one to get us started: When Lisa is assigned to babysit Bart, and he retaliates with prank calls, etc., and then falls down the stairs and hurts himself, Lisa calls 911: Lisa: "Hello, this is the Simpson residence . . . " Operator: “Simpson? Oh, no! We’ve already been out there tonight for an emergency sisterectomy, a case of terminal buttrot, and a leprechaun fight! How dumb do you think we are?” ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/2 "2003-11-23T04:45:58Z")
In the Mel Gibson episode, when Mel submits his remake of _Mr. Smith Goes to Washington_ (with much bloody carnage added on Homer’s advice) to the studio brass: Exec: “This film is AWFUL! It’s worse than **Godfather 3!** ” Mel: “Whoa! Let’s not say stuff we can’t take back.” Exec: “Alright, I’m sorry.” One of my all-time favorite lines is by the German guy at “Fourth Reich Motors” when Lisa points out that their crash-test footage isn’t using real dummies: “This exhibit is closed.” ---
**Author:** ![Mojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Mojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mojo)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/3 "2003-11-23T06:02:57Z")
Duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh LEADER! ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/4 "2003-11-23T06:13:51Z")
If you like to watch your tv, and I mean _really_ watch it… ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/5 "2003-11-23T06:16:17Z")
“I had a _strooooooke!_” ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/6 "2003-11-23T06:41:45Z")
I enjoyed the line from the enviro-hunk Lisa was so stricken with when she was trying to save the tree: > [@](#): > > I’m a fifth-degree vegan. I don’t eat anything that casts a shadow. ---
**Author:** ![MrSarcasticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@MrSarcasticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrSarcasticus)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/7 "2003-11-23T06:53:21Z")
To the Beemobile! ---
**Author:** ![autobulb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@autobulb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/autobulb)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/8 "2003-11-23T07:36:35Z")
In one of the Treehouse of Horror episodes where Monty Burns is a vampire: Lisa: Dad! Bart is a vampire! Homer: Oh Lisa. You and your stories. Bart is a vampire. Beer kills brain cells. Now let’s go back to that building… thingy… where our beds and TV… is. ---
**Author:** ![autobulb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@autobulb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/autobulb)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/9 "2003-11-23T07:37:59Z")
Damn, I just realized the topic title said non-recurring. Please forgive… ---
**Author:** ![eli\_the\_fanatic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ccd318/32.png) [@eli\_the\_fanatic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eli_the_fanatic)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/10 "2003-11-23T07:41:54Z")
Do they mean non-recurring lines or non-recurring characters? How about the clerk attending to Comic Book Guy at the store. CBG: I’d like to return this quote unquote one-size-fits-all Star Trek Utility Belt. Clerk: What seems to be the problem, quote-unquote sir? ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 8:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/11 "2003-11-23T08:43:20Z")
Lisa was taking dance lessons, but was no good, and used Professor Frink’s mechanical dancing shoes during a recital. Lisa’s instructor (a former Shirley Temple-like child star whose character name escapes me) found out and uttered: “I’m _ever_ so pissed!” ---
**Author:** ![Gmork](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f19dbf/32.png) [@Gmork](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gmork)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/12 "2003-11-23T10:38:18Z")
**Ranchoth** - I was going to say that!!! 'Mrs Pommelhorse! Can I get down now? - Small child hanging precariously from a very high bar in a deserted gymnasium ---
**Author:** ![Armilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e19b73/32.png) [@Armilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Armilla)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/13 "2003-11-23T11:00:17Z")
I always had something of a soft spot for the eastern-european gymnastics coach, Lugash. Lugash : How old are you, sweetie? Lisa : Eight Lugash : Too old! Go home, grandma! [Other chidren giggle] Lugash : No giggling! It veakens ze haunches! ---
**Author:** ![Phelan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a183cd/32.png) [@Phelan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phelan)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/14 "2003-11-23T14:04:40Z")
The name might be Little Vicky: Come on now, turn that frown upside down!!! That’s a SMILE not an upside down frown! ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/15 "2003-11-23T14:54:30Z")
Hippie at the recycling place: "Sounds like you’re livin’ for your car, man. Simplify. SIMPLIFY! ---
**Author:** ![Burrido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Burrido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Burrido)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/16 "2003-11-23T18:28:55Z")
TV spokesmen: “Fox is experiencing technical difficulties at this moment. Please do not talk to family members or loved ones. Do not attempt any sexual relations for years of radiation has left your genitals withered and useless.” Wiggum pulls up covers and looks down: “Well, I’ll be” ---
**Author:** ![Spudo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@Spudo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spudo)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/17 "2003-11-23T18:35:42Z")
Jimmy: What’s gonna happen to him? Mechanic: Remember that Oldsmobile we just couldn’t fix? Jimmy: We’re gonna sell him to Mr. Stefanopolos? Mechanic: You’re a dull boy Jimmy. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/18 "2003-11-23T18:46:46Z")
“Um, yeah, anyone wanna trade seats?” - the guy sitting next to Leonard Nemoy on the monorail. ---
**Author:** ![Sketch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Sketch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sketch)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/19 "2003-11-23T18:49:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MrSarcasticus \* > \*\*To the Beemobile! \*\* You mean your Chevy? …Yeah. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768/20 "2003-11-23T18:53:23Z")
Homer: I’d kill you if I had my gun. Gun Shop Owner: Yeah, well you don’t. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsons-non-recurring-character-lines/214768.md?page=2)